"Oh, I'm sorry, did I sit on your cupholder?" *suction-pop noise* -------------- George decided this would be the last time he buttered himself up to ride the incomparably cheap Lilliput Airlines.
"This is your captain speaking, due to an unforeseen addition in weight, we will be flying at cruising altitude of approximately zero feet. If any of our passengers would like to make their planned arrival times, it would be in their best interest to get out and push. And thank you again for driving American Air."
For those aviation types: Ladies and gentlemen, we regret to inform you that because of the extreme shift in the aircraft's center of gravity, we would have to fly at an angle of attack much greater than the stall aoa in order to take off, therefor we will not be departing.