Just remembered it so I thought I'd share: One night I dreamt I was at the third annual Wisconsin Chicken Fest, this was back in 2005. I live in Canada and have never been to Wisconsin much less know what the fuck a chicken festival is. When I woke up I told my buddies (one of whom was Chater) and as a joke they googled it. We found out that; that year the little town of Darboy was holding the third annual Wisconsin Chicken Festival. Yeah, Nostradamus doesn't have shit on me. <a class="postlink" href="http://www.darboyfest.org/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;">http://www.darboyfest.org/</a>
Scootah dreamed last night that he was a medieval soldier returning home after years of war. Enroute, he fell in love with hooker, married her, and brought her home with him. Turns out he had been fucking his sister before going off to war, and bitch was pissed about the strumpet. ...I'm trying really really hard not to read to much into this story. And I'm really glad Scootah is an only child. Now quick, go take the piss out of him.
I'm doing a trial on a CPAP machine and the doc warned me that I'd start dreaming more. I think he was right. Last night I dreamed that I was some sort of soldier in Canada, obsessed with digging the Canadian coins out of my pay. And when I found them, they were intricate metalwork lattices. I don't remember, but I was probably also missing my underwear. That seems to be a common thread for me.
I usually only remember my dreams when I'm sleeping in hotels, because inconsiderate assholes wake me up all night long. It's kind of fuzzy, but yesterday morning I dreamt that I was back at the campground I worked at in high school/college, but everyone that was staying there was somebody that I knew. Some were people from high school, some from college, some from work, and some that I met when I moved down here a few years ago. I was walking through one of the buildings, and my brother was drunk and peeing in the corner. Then I started walking up the hill, just as 3 motorhomes decided to empty their sewage tanks and let it run down the hill towards me. For some reason I helped them unclog one of the sewage lines. I think I ended up in the main office, sitting in a circle with my parents, my bosses and my ex-girlfriend from 5 years ago, and I was telling them all that she was pregnant with my baby. I woke up in a cold sweat. My wife and I just found out she's pregnant, and it scares the shit out of me that somehow my brain connected pregnancy to my crazy bitch of an ex. I don't know what any of the rest of that shit means.
I had a dream the other night that my brain was laid out like the "program files" folder on my computer, and I was in there moving and deleting memories to clear up space. Now if I had only defragged the drive... I wish it was that easy.
Last night I had a weird dream. I was driving along a road through a desert. There was nothing but sand in every direction, except for the highway. I was in the first car my parents ever owned. A Chrysler Sigma....it was a burnt orange coloured piece of crap. In the dream I recognized it as their old car, and I was marvelling at how strange that was when I noticed a hitchhiker in the side of the road. I picked her up, and in my dream it was my nextdoor neighbours daughter, but she was actually Catherine Bell (the chick from JAG). Remembering the dream, it is clear as day it's Catherine Bell, but for some reason in the dream I accepted her as my nextdoor neighbours daughter. We started talking about old times, and then out of nowhere I just started jerking off. We're talking like nothing is happening, and I'm beating it like there's no tomorrow. At some point I started to get self conscious and stopped, but then i'd begin again thinking she couldn't see me. After a bit she looks at me weird and says "let me know when your close to cumming, and you can cum inside my ass". Then she just goes back to rambling on about whatever it was she was talking about. After that the whole jerking off part stopped, and suddenly we were in a mall parking lot. She gets out and when I go to follow her, she has turned into my best friends sister, and nothing at all seems strange about this. We go inside and go to the food court, and there's a gigantic food fight going on, and that's pretty much where I woke up. It was fucking completely bizarre.
The dream I just woke up from was creepy but not entirely unpleasant. For some reason, I am Paul Dano, and I am trapped in this house with an older man who is like my mentor. There are ghosts or monsters after us, and we keep trying all the exits but all the doors are locked. The older man finds the one unlocked door, and it is a small dark closet. I shake my head, knowing somehow that it's a trap. I back up and go toward the window, and it opens for me. I push myself out, hanging off the ledge, and what looks like a sheer face to the house actually has other little ledges that I catch as I drop down to the ground. When I hit the ground, it looks like I've broken my ankle but I'm actually fine. Just as I hit the ground, whatever was coming after us gets the old man, and I start to run. Once the house is out of sight, I realize my dog is not with me, and I start to call him. Right on cue he crashes out of darkness and we run together down the street of an old neighborhood. Even though I'm a terrible runner, in the dream I feel like I will be able to run for miles before getting tired, and he is right there with me. I am more worried that he will slow down before I do. I hear an alert go out for people to be on the lookout for a kid in a white nightshirt, because I'm dressed like I'm in the Victorian period. People start coming at every angle and I'm sure they're going to get me, but then a girl who looks like the girl from The Ring materializes on someone's lawn, and everyone thinks that's who they are after. I realize she is one of the ghosts who is after me and run away again while she kills people who are looking at her. The rest of the dream is too fuzzy to remember. All I know is I hate stupid ghosts.
Last night I had the most fucked up dream ever. I was cuddling in a tub, with an ex-boyfriend, clothed, and the tub was empty. The tub was in an old Victorian house, and it was in flames. So were sitting in this tub and the whole house is just burning down around us. Then I wake up.
I have been having a lot of sexy type dreams, well, they would be sexy but I keep getting rejected (pretty sad when you can't get laid in your dreams). I will spare you all of the boring details because I am sure my dream humiliation is only of interest to me. In my amateur psychologist mind, I am interpreting it as a fear of failure as I am getting ready to undertake a new career, am studying to pass a national certification exam so I can continue to practice in the new career, etc. It certainly can't mean that I am not capable of sealing the deal if I chose to, can it????
I've had the same dream several times (4 or 5), it seems to be short, but absurd none the less.. I'm sitting on the front porch of the house I grew up in as a child, talking to cats (who talk back, and are dressed like the cats in the Disney movie "Aristocats" (I think that's what it was called). Then, the sky turns red, and a giant robot tarantula appears from the woods, I run, and run, and run. End dream. What the fuck is so important that it needs to keep being dreamed(?) over and over?
It was very windy here last night. 30-35 mph winds and gusts as high as 60mph. Therefore I had my usual dream (nightmare?) about sailing in a storm. Just about every time I sleep with heavy winds whipping around outside I have a dream where I'm out in the ocean, sometimes with other people (who are there but I never see), sometimes alone, and I'm fighting a storm trying to get back to the harbor. The boat isn't in any danger of sinking but my adrenalin is flowing as I'm waiting for a big wave to break over the boat. Half the time I have this dream I semi-awake, and think I'm actually on the boat. I instantly panic because I shouldn't have fallen asleep in that situation. I'll leap out of bed and usually that's when I realize I'm not on my boat (carpet on the floor, seeing the outline of the bedroom windows, etc) but occasionally I don't realize it right away and nearly throw myself down the stairs because the stairs in my house to go downstairs are precisely where the stairs to go on deck are on my boat. This morning at 1AM it was one of the latter. Bathed in sweat I went to climb up but didn't find the first rung/step and instead fell forward. Luckily I caught the banister before I went tumbling down the stairs. With the way the weather is around here I probably have this dream ten times a year.
I had a dream last night that turned into a lucid dream after something so unexplainable happened. My dream started as they usually do, me being so badass I have to save the world from some horrible apocalypse type thing. This time it was a crazy scientist who had engineered mutated dinosaurs that were going to take over the world. The bastard also kidnapped a hot girl that I had to save. So I break into the facility, fighting, shooting, and just general awesomeness occurs. I rescue the hot girl and that is when the crazy scientist releases the dreaded T-Rex. So we are running for our lives until I come up with a brilliant plan. I will hijack a fire truck and then impale it with the ladder fully extended kind of like jousting. I defeat the t-rex and the scientist sends his evil henchmen for us. We start running until I look back and see the one and only Bill Murray. I stop dead in my tracks Me: "Hold on, Bill Murray why are you chasing me?" BM: "I don't know, I get bored sometimes, why are you running?" Me: "No this is impossible, there is no way that Bill Murray would be chasing me trying to kill me. Am I dreaming?" BM: "Yeah probably" Me: "Oh....so what do I do now?" BM: "Who knows, this is your dream kid." Then I just waited around for a while until I woke up. There was also the time that I dreamed I went to a party with William Shatner. That man can party.
This was years and years ago, but the most vivid and real dream I ever had. Me and this girl my age (no clue who she was) were fighting a monster that had erased everyone in the world. And for some reason, the world was now covered in concrete and swimming pools. There's little sheds, fences, and not to mention TONS of tropical plants, but no houses or streets. Just one pool surrounded on 4 sides by other pools. And the amazing thing was, these hundreds of pools were portals. You dive into one, you surface in another. We killed the monster by pushing him into a pol, and draining the pool it connected to so he would never surface. Oh, then...uh...me and the girl...fucked. Yeah. That's an idiot board dream right there.
Slept like shit last night. Woke up at 2:30, 4:30 and 8 because of bad dreams. The only one I can remember was the most recent. I was walking my dog and cat home from this kennel type place (the cat was walking off-leash right beside me). Odd thing was, the place was where my grandparents used to live in West Roxbury, MA. I walked not a house up from the entrance to the kennels when this black car pulled out from the next driveway, followed my for about 5 seconds, then stopped and this Russian guy and his kid stepped out. The guy pulled out a gun and said "Hello [c_norris]. Hope you're having a nice day. We're now going to take your cat" and the kid moved to pick up my cat. Normally my kitty is timid as hell, but suddenly she got the most demonic look in history, eyes bloodshot red, and latched onto the kid's throat like a badly-animated horror movie, and proceeded to rip the everloving shit out of his neck. I stood there paralyzed with shock, and the guy shot at her a few times, but then she literally flew over and did the same thing to him. Just ripped him to pieces. Blood everywhere, both of them dead. Then she was normal, and we walked up the street like nothing happened. We turned the corner, and I woke up. Truly a WTF situation when I woke up.
I have this same dream a couple times a year, and it always results in me waking up in cold sweats. It happened again last night and I figured it was appropriate for this thread. I dream that I die, and I can see my funeral. It's always an outdoor funeral with an open casket and I can see my dead self laying there. All my family and friends sit in white chairs, and in the front row, between my parents, is an empty chair, where I assume I would be sitting had it not been my funeral. Instead, sitting in the empty chair, is the spirit or ghost or whatever of my best friends Dad who died about 5 years ago. My ghosty self runs to talk to him, but he disappears and I wake up at that moment every time.
Another fucking weird one this morning. This was the last of three bizarre dreams last night, and this is the only one I remember now. It starts out that I'm in the center enclosure of an Old Navy/Gap-type store. jeans and shirts everywhere on tables etc. I'm there with my ex-girlfriend and two 7- or 8-year-old boys that she knows but I don't. Me and her are talking when suddenly she gets this scary-ass look in her eyes and turns into this weird creature that tries to rip me to shreds. I'm terrified and just as she's about to claw me open I get transported to another room... it's like two rectangular rooms joined mostly along one side, completely bare except for two sets of sliding doors. Then I see two guys and a girl I know from school pressing their faces against the glass in the weirdest zombie looks I've ever seen. They keep saying "hey [c_norris], open the glass" but I don't because they're prob zombies. Then I'm transported back to the room with my ex in it, she is still the weird creature thing. It tries to attack again but then I grow these weird huge claws and fucking rip it to shreds, just totally destroy it. Then it turns back into her and she's lying in a bloody mess bawling her eyes out. Then I hold her in my arms telling her it's ok, and then I wake up when we are embracing. What the hell. ?
Fuck me. I dream somewhat regularly and I remember quite a few of my dreams. Last night however, I wish I hadn't. I was in a world of shit, something like Nazi Germany and the forces (army/police etc.) were after me and everyone I know/like/love. I was extremely paranoid, moving around my normal surroundings and everything I did made the whole situation worse. It was a perpetual motion shitstorm. I am not normally paranoid or scared or anxious, but man did I wake up scared. Most unrelaxing sleep I've ever had, no comparison to sleeping on a burmese bus.
The funniest and most amusing dream I have ever had: Starts off with me as the richest person in the world, and I'm having one of my business, Rupert Murdoch, partners over for dinner. I decide that I'm going to make him a prune-chicken soup so I go out and buy a brand new toilet to cook the meal in. When he comes over and starts to eat his food, I die, go to the gates, and get sent down to hell by St. Peter for being such an ass in life and especially for having supper with Rupert. So I'm in hell beating the piss out of some demons when I get beamed up to heaven. There, I'm told by God that I have been assigned to a team that includes a friend of mine, Stan, and some guy I don't know who's name I forget and a celebrity whom I think was Dolph Lundgren. We get decked out in gear and weapons and are sent to a Slayer concert where we have to kill everyone there in order to win our right to go to heaven. When we're done, we meet one last person we have to kill who tuns out to be the prince of darkness, Ozzy Osbourne. We didn't want to kill him so we decide to party with him.
A couple nights ago I had this dream: I am dating the hot drug dealer who sat next to me in Grade 12 Chemistry. Logically, I decide to invite him to meet my entire extended extremely conservative, Christian family. He was feeling really uncomfortable, so I decide to take him downstairs to "loosen him up." We start making out, and in my dream he is an awful kisser (not in real life, though), so I think, "Fuck this shit" and start giving him head. Mid blow job, someone opens the door. I then woke up and never found out who caught us.