Ideas for the birds

So a lot of us have seen in the news lately about the thousands of blackbirds dying midair in Arkansas.

We all have weird ideas about stuff in life. Whether it be JFK or Roswell or chupacabras I your backyard. Share them now.

FOCUS: What conspiracies do you believe/find interesting?
ALT FOCUS: What the hell happened to the blackbirds and fish in Arkansas?

 

I think maybe they BUMPed into something.

 

I don't really believe in any conspiracies personally. Not to say that I don't find any of them plausible, its just that I tend to lean to the story as it is reported. I have been called naive before for this, however, what evidence do I have to argue against the story as it has been reported.

Ohh and those kids that made the "documentary" Loose Change were going around talking shit about 9/11 on the talk show circuit need to get the shit kicked out of them preferably by a bunch of NYFD fireman armed with haligan bars.

For Reference if you don't know the kids i am talking about.

Spoiler

As for the birds at first i thought it would end up being something like a toxic gas release, either natural or from an industrial center. (Example: Poison Gas Kills Bison in Yellowstone) But now they are saying that upon examination of the dead birds they show signs of trauma, so i have no clue.

 

Here's my theory:

Tom Cruise ascended to a new level in the video game that is his religion. As a reward, he was given the coveted flying spaghetti monster so that he could quickly bring his war to the Vatican and, shortly thereafter, Mecca. As we all know, this monster has the power of invisibility, gained from the addition of vodka sauce, in lieu of conventional marinara.

As he took off across the country, he mistakenly aimed his aerial pasta beast into multiple flocks of birds in the south-eastern United States. Realizing that the news would surely pick up on such an odd story, he took off to Sweden where he encountered yet another group of birds.

He's laying low now until the heat blows over and environmentalists have convinced everyone that fireworks killed the birds, depite the fact that it's highly unlikely unless the fireworks were shot from underneath their nests.

 

Isn't it just most likely that the birds were Cleveland sports fans, and they just killed themselves?

 

Modified Alt Focus: It's not just Arkansas. There's also been birds go down in Louisiana and Sweden as well as 40000 crabs wash up on beaches across the UK from what I've been reading. It's interesting to go on some of the conspiracy theory sites. They seem to think the poles are about to invert.

On a fucked up side note, it seems NASA is expecting the next solar maximum within a month or so of the mayan prediction of 2012.

 

2 Pac is totally alive.

 

I'm curious about the possibility that the ships at Pearl were left exposed as a bait to tempt the Axis, to galvanise the US public into supporting the intervention in a European war. Attacking Pearl was basically the act that defeated the axis, the ships there weren't tactically significant. The crews were for the most part not strategically significant, and had Yamamoto just held off on dragging the US into the war until the Axis had completed kicking the crap out of Asia and Europe - we would very likely all be speaking German and talking about how negroes and jews are extinct now.

I'm not sold on the suggestion that it was a conspiracy to get the US into the fight, but it does interest me.

 

Oh. More fish have died. Should have checked the news before I made my post above. A new swath of animals is dying daily now.

<a class="postlink" href="http://www.cnn.com/2011/US/01/06/maryland.fish.kill/index.html?hpt=T2" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;">http://www.cnn.com/2011/US/01/06/maryla ... tml?hpt=T2</a>

 

This is my thought on the matter. I don't know why some idiot put this as a "fail" though.

 

The biggest conspiracy theory I'm sold on is JFK's assasination.

The Kennedy's had mob ties back from their bootlegging days and all of a sudden JFK and Bobby go on an organized crime rant and end up dead. We're supposed to believe Oswald acted alone?

Not to mention Ruby "acting alone" and all the holes in the Warren Commission, everything's tied up a little too neatly.

Fuck that, something doesn't add up.

 

Dead birds and fish? Yeah, there's a conspiracy in play here, and it involves the CIA and ToyToy.

 

I think if I had more time and energy the JFK conspiracy is something I'd really like to take on as a greater interest.

In middle school, my English teacher's dad was a trauma surgery resident at Parkland when JFK came in. (She brought in his coat one time that had some of JFK's blood on it....it had turned green by then). His role was to hold his head still while other docs did their thing. So, he got a really good look at the point of entrance/exit. He said after that day the FBI met with every doctor, nurse, etc that was in the room that day and told them what they saw. I think she said the FBI successfully bribed some of them to say the bullet entered a completely different way from how it really happened, and some of them were on talk shows spouting straight-out lies about JFK's wound (according to my teacher's dad). Also, I'm pretty sure he thought someone had messed with his body for the autopsy pics.

It's pretty fucked up that 40+ years later we still don't know what exactly happened.

 

Bird and fish kills happen occasionally. This is an instance of a media organization actually paying attention to one particular kill. This in turn raises the awareness of the public to bird kills, suddenly people are noticing bird kills that would have otherwise gone unremarked, and viola, the end of the world is coming.

For example, if I say to you "geeze, have you noticed all of the blue cars on the road lately?", you are more likely to be aware of blue cars as you drive, and come to the erroneous conclusion that the preference for blue cars is a recent fad. There is a phrase for this phenomenon that some of you may know but I can't seem to recall.

 

I was close to coming to grips with reality...but I stepped off the ledge.

Dick.

 

Hey look. Somebody made a google map of all the little critters dying

Conspiracies? Never had time for them. Although the Fiance's cooking does taste a little arsenicky.

 

I don't have any idea what happened to the birds in Arkansas, nor do I care enough to come up with a kooky conspiracy theory. My only question is who will weaponize the phenomenon first - the U.S. or China? I hope it's the U.S.

 

I guess. It's just weird I've never heard of millions of fish and dozens of different species of birds all dying around the planet within a week.