Rant: "I can't stop thinking about you. Wtf is up w/ that?" This creeps me out enough to begin with. Throw in the fact that she is married and the crazy meter is going off the charts.
rant watching someone you know really well, have a psychotic break? About the most terrifying thing ever. I fucking hate this.
Rant: Complete life upheaval. I've dropped all of my classes this semester, I'm scrambling to get a "normal" full-time job with a specific company/institution, I'm desperately trying to get into another university in a completely different area, I'm rushing around trying to find a room/board somewhere close to my as-yet-hypothetical job, I'm picking up a ton of bills that I haven't budgeted for, and I'm pretty sure that once I've accomplished all of this...I won't hear from my family again until a major holiday or birthday comes around. Words were said (My favorite? "I'm tired of not being able to be racist in my own house!"), ultimatums were thrown down, and we are all just entirely done with the pretense of familial loyalty. Most people approach their Augean stables with a shovel and the ability to celebrate incremental change, but throwing a stick of dynamite into a stall and hoping for the best seems to be how I handle that sort of shit lately. There really needs to be a support group for this sort of thing. Rave: This can only get better. Right? Right? Also, The Dude. He has been aces at The Sex recently and it totally helps take my mind off of the other things. At least for 10-20 minutes at a time.
Rant: Nothing like turning a 15 minute maintenance/upgrade task into a downed production database. Rave: I fixed it before anyone noticed/cared (People noticed because I told them - im not going to hide) and I fixed it in like an hour. Now if my heart will stop beating Rant: Still not totally sure HOW I fixed it. Need to scour logs to see what I tried worked.
Rant: What the fuck is it about winter that makes people lose the ability to clean up after their dog? Does cold weather evaporate dog shit and I just don't know it? 'Cause if it does, that's the scientific breakthrough of the goddamn year. Rave: About to start a new job... AS A MASKED VIGILANTE WHO BEATS THE HELL OUT OF LAZY ASSHOLES WHO REFUSE TO PICK UP THEIR DOG'S SHIT.
Rant: Wife left yesterday to visit her parents for a week since her mom isn't doing well at all and they couldn't travel here for the holidays. I miss the Mrs already. Rave: Keeping a positive perspective on things, it's giving me the opportunity to spend just "Dad" time with my girls which is pretty cool. I'm studying during the day so I can be free in the evenings. We cooked dinner together last night, played Scrabble afterwards, and just talked about life. It gave them the opportunity to talk about things they're a little uncomfortable discussing in front of mom and what mom is going through with her Mother's failing health and rapid decline. Some touchy subjects, but healthy conversations. Rant: back to the books.
Rave:Have had a great time in England for the past week. My sister has matured to about a 25 year old, so she is now only 6 years behind. We get along great now, and she and Jägerette got along well (they have never met) rant:My mom was out visiting too, and my sister, her fiance, his parents and I discussed her behavior for the past years, and the basic answer is: She is crazy. She lies to us, she had a break down because my dad visited my sister and met his grandkids, (which my mother has been preventing for the past decade). She needs serious help.
Rant: I want to know what the fuck i did to the ball of my left foot. Got up this morning and it feels like someone took a hammer to it in the middle of the night.
Rave/Rant(but mostly rave): On New Years Day her royal highness threw up again, but this time there was blood in it (or most specifically big nasty looking blood clots.) And then when I peaked at her gums they were almost pure white, so her anemia was back. She had not been feeling well for a couple of days, but I figured she was having good days and bad days due to the medications for the supposed Lyme's disease and just generally being old and sick. So we go back to the vet on the 2nd and basically restart the whole process anew with cancer back on the table. This time we get a specialist to perform the ultrasound and go with continued blood work. Once again the ultrasound is inclusive, but the blood clots and fecal samples show she is digesting her own blood. This sends us to the doggie gastrointestinal specialist so miss Ellie can have a camera shoved up her ass to find out that apparently needs some yoga or shit, because she has an ulcer.* Which is probably the issue she's had since right after Thanksgiving and no Lyme's disease or auto-immune disorder. Keep her on a soft food diet and Prilosec OTC and she will probably be fine. So it took about $6,000 to figure out that my dog has stress issues** *In truth dog ulcers are typically a sign of cancer or some other major disease. ** Most likely it was from the NSAID painkiller after he tussle with another dog at Thanksgiving, but I prefer to think that she leads such a stressful life that she gave herself an ulcer.
Rave (w/ a side of Rant): My dad is sort of visiting me for two weeks! His company got a project in Oklahoma that requires his supervision during a transitional phase, so while he's taking care of that he's staying with me instead of a hotel. He, my mom, sister & one of my brothers live in Colorado Springs and ever since I moved back to Oklahoma in March (to take care of my grandma, who died a month to the day after I moved in w/ her; leaving me alone w/ 2 dogs, 13 cats, a 45 minute commute to work at a job I don't particularly like 5 days a week - one of which is always Saturday - & a 103 year old house w/ some issues.... but that's a rant for another day) I've really missed them. It was awesome getting to spend the whole week between Christmas & New Years Eve with them, so it's nice having dad around for a little bit to ween myself back into my usual single living routine. Rant (more of just an observation): When living alone, it's amazing how totally and completely you can sink into a routine of base functionality. Since I knew my dad was coming I decided to give my house a super special cleaning and realized how non-socially I live. Salt & pepper & water jug on the coffee table because that's where I take all of my meals - in front of the TV. All of my clean gym clothes are on the bench by the back door so that I can take off my work clothes, throw them directly into the washing machine, dress for the gym & head right back out the door. All other clean clothes are arranged in piles according to color on the guest bed so that I can quickly get dressed for work (the closet space in a 103 year old house is basically non-existent). My 5 most worn pairs of shoes reside by the front door. The same bowl, plate, fork, knife, spoon, pot, & skillet are on constant rotation from the right (dirty) side of the sink to the left (clean) side of the sink - never actually making it to the cupboard. I cook on Fridays for Sat-Sun & on Sunday for Mon-Thurs (lunches & dinners), so all of my meals-for-one are portioned and stacked in my fridge in sectional Tupperware. And I never realized how often I walk around naked/ partially naked until I couldn't do it anymore. It's only been 3 days and I can't even count how many times I've almost walked out of the bathroom/bedroom naked, or started to strip the second I walked through the front door only to have to check myself. Holy. Cow. It's not like I don't have friends. I have friends I go to dinner with weekly. Friends I watch football with, go have drinks with, visit on the weekends, & even a couple of gym partners. So, I'm not a hermit or some anti-social cat lady... but as for the function of getting through the daily routines that serve as the springboard for my life - I live ALONE. And... I actually kind of love it! But I am aware that it looks bizarre to outside parties who are used to living with other people and can't just arrange everything to suite their personal ease - because one man's function is another man's dysfunction. All of this to say: I love having my dad here (we watched a "Through The Worm Hole with Morgan Freeman" marathon the other night; this sparked an hour long discussion that started off with the theory of "global consciousness" and ended with my dad saying "and that's why this whole 2012 Apocalypse thing is horseshit"), but man is it awkward answering the question "Why is there a bottle of vodka and a shot glass by the bath tub?"
Rant: Sweet jesus, I'm getting pregnancy scared by a one-night stand I foolishly slept with and regretted instantly and of course used a condom... I'm hoping/thinking she's just being manipulative.
Rant: I just walked by a meeting where these idiots I work with are talking about 6 week delivery commitments on new equipment. On what planet? We're 12 weeks out you dumb shits. You cannot fabricate more time so quit selling bullshit and making this company even worse and more stress filled than it already is. Rave: Pulling the weekend trigger in 2.5 hours. Rant: Weekend is packed with shit to do. Hate it when every minute of free time is booked up completely like that.
Rave: 55 degrees and sunny in January. Perfect day to take down my Christmas lights. Rant: So of course I have a slight fever and feel like someone shoved silly putty up my nose and sandpaper down my throat, and now I can't get it out.
Rant: International Fuel Tax Agreement (IFTA). We used 4.89 gallons less than what we purchased last quarter and yet I owe you $200 in extra taxes (a privilege that I pay $3400 a year for). Fuck you....directly in the ass please...thank you.
Rave/rant: I've been assigned to sell to bigger/better companies and will be reporting to the CEO in addition to our sales VP... and while this is awesome, the double edged sword is added pressure I put on myself and anxiety over performance. I'll be trailblazing in areas we have no experience in and while I am confident there's tremendous opportunity, fuck sakes it won't be easy. Rave: I wasn't sure how much I'd like this particular sales gig, but feeling like a damn conquistador is awesome. Some days I come home feeling burned out and unproductive, but the hard-earned wins are the most gratifying and I know they're out there. Rave: My great aunt is doing really well. She has yet to start radiation treatment and the future is still uncertain, but the outlook is good enough to let the whole family breathe much easier.
Maga Rant: Just found out the job I applied for that i really wanted, got filled already. Usually it takes 1-1.5 months for them to give out interviews. It has only been 2 weeks or so, and they have already filled the position. I would of been happy with just an interview. Now I find this out on a friday afternoon. Fuck this is going to be a depressing weekend.
Rant: I'm sick of feeling lost. I'm sick of feeling at sea. I'm sick of being emo about shit. My life feels like a fucking roller coaster and all I just want it to go back to being fucking awesome. If anything else goes majorly wrong in the next couple of days, I might just snap off my rollers. I could really use some shit breaking my way. Fuck this week.
Rant: NOTHING says lovin' like leaving work at 0230 and arriving at 0845 to find that the locks were cut, the door broken, and 9 whole dollars change was stolen, along with my laptop and blackberry. I fucking hate people.
RAVE: Pretty good day today. I slept in, went out for lunch with my brother then went to the gun club. I spent a few hours there, came home and played some COD MW3. Then went over to my cousins farm for a bit to shoot the shit. After I left there I went to another cousins farm to see what was going on and they invited me out to dinner. I went to Red Lobster for the first time ever which was pretty good. After that we went and seen the new Mission Impossible movie, then went home where I had a nice big glass of Dalwinnie and shot the shit with the old man. It's too bad days like this are few and far between. RAVE: I want to buy a toy this year, eaither a 2012 H-D Street Glide (110 cubic inch, Screamin Eagle, all that shit) or trade my truck in and buy a 2012 Ram 2500 Cummins with a 6 speed manual. Shitty part is that the truck I got now is a 2011 Ram 1500 with the Hemi which I bought 9 months ago, so the sales guy said I would probably loose $10k just in trade in. Fucking redicilous. I really want the truck but I can't justify loosing that kind of money, so now I'm kind of leaning towards the bike. I'm kinda hitting the first world problem thing here.