I don't know how to embed the video. Whatever. Watch it, it's funny. Promo for the new show on IFC. https://www.instagram.com/p/BPdaCB6BbFs/
Newb. Rip the bag out of the box and suck on that spigot like you're huffing nitrous from a balloon. Every. Last. Drop... Guaranteed. Along with your pride.
I don't consider myself a proud person, however, I do not need wine badly enough to cut the bag open to get that last ounce out. Segue: I got to make a joke today at work about nuts and bags. We had a package today, two nuts had fallen out of the box. There was a bag of hardware inside. Upon cupping the bag I couldn't find a hole. I was able to put the two nuts that had somehow fallen out of the bag into the invoice slip so that I didn't have to open the whole package. My job sucks, it sucked especially today for some reason, but that joke about cupping the bag almost made it worth putting up with the bullshit today. Almost. (I realize that this joke was much funnier when it happened, I also don't really care so I'm going to post it anyway,)
You don't cut the bag, only pull the bag out of the box. Then you suck the air out of the bag, and at the end, you get wine, until you can't suck no more. Am I really explaining to you how to get the most out of boxed wine?
Tip from the experienced. Just make sure the tap thingy isn't on your face side when using it as a pillow.
Yesterday, I woke up at 2 a.m. to drive to New Hampshire for school. I lost a $110k deal and my boss tells me we lost a $235k deal. And now, after a bean salad my farts sound like a New Orleans marching band made of firecrackers and muddy boots. Fucking Blue Monday it true.
Are you for or against womens suffrage? Personally I am against women suffering but for their ability to have suffrage
Anybody else getting tornado'd? (uh, not a sex euphemism) I currently do not have power. Taking cover in the pantry lost its fun after about 5 minutes. And, now, I can't really go anywhere because of the continued severe weather threat for the rest of the day. Boooooooooo.
To be serious for a moment, I'm obviously for it. I wish the women marching the best and more power to them. Make Susan B. Anthony proud. If only the dicks in office would open their minds and hearts. Back to the drunk thread... What the hell can you do that makes sitting in a pantry fun for five minutes? ... You know what, nevermind.
Just remember... everything is a dildo if you try hard enough. It's starting to get a bit windy here because it's getting so warm out... up to 10 deg C so far, and some blue sky. They're calling for record-breaking highs today that were set over 100 years ago.
Hey, being surrounded by food is fun. It doesn't mean I was carving potatoes and putting them in my butt. I mean, if that was a thing.