So apparently telling your wife she can't have her Christmas present in the beginning of fucking November is a great way to piss her off.
I'm almost too embarrassed to post this: I'm small, but wiry. Where was that question? I'm sure it would have added 5 Biebers to my total easily. But she wants sex NOW!
You fucking monster. I hope she tells all her friends about the shadow who oversees her every breath.
Tell her there are men out there who don't start thinking about Christmas presents until December 23rd and she should consider herself lucky.
Absolute truth. then there's the ones who wait until Christmas Eve then realize it would just be easier to dump her than brave the malls.
So I was watching a movie on TV and it ended. A new movie came on but I wasn't really paying attention. I glance up and there's dongs all over the place. It's a movie called Confetti, some kind of mockumentary and they are at a nudist camp. Guys playing badminton--naked. They weren't even using a net! I think it's a comedy. I know I laughed.
Re: Re: 11/1/13 WDT NSFW Thats the way she is acting, I am getting the silent treatment, I actually find it funny which just pisses her off more.
Re: Re: 11/1/13 WDT NSFW Aren't you the one who found out your wife was several years younger than you thought?
Went out drinking with a female "friend" last night who had me pull over multiple times on the way home so she could puke. Fast forward to this morning, and I'm dry heaving as I scrape chunks off my car door, questioning whether I want to keep doing this every weekend. Silly question, anyone here turned sober? Drinking is not fun anymore. I almost feel like I have to in social situations, but I don't think the health risks and aftermath are worth the fun I used to have drinking. Maybe I'm maturing, maybe I'm just talking. Maybe I'll have a beer tonight, dunno.
My cousin has 2 little boys and fun stories about announcing boners at inappropriate times. In the middle of church, "MOMMY! MY WEE WEE'S GETTING BIGGER!" In the stands of a soccer game, "Why is my wee wee hard? It's like there's a bone in it!" I don't know what I'm gonna do if I ever have a boy. There's no way I'm responding to that with a straight face.
I man cannot outgrow getting drunk and yelling at people in the streets. It's factory-installed in our DNA.
I forgot that I hadn't shown my kids any pictures of the house we're moving into...so I showed my youngest. He looks at me and says "Mom. That yard is huge. I love you. I'll die mowing it. Make the other kid mow it." He's quite serious, because of his asthma and allergies. Heh.
Ive kind of been in this existential drinking funk for a little while. I think its situational for me since I kind of live out of the way of most of my friends and refuse to drive drunk anymore so I have to save up my hard partying for the weekend. Honestly even during college I was never a huge weekday drinker as I prefer to be clear headed most of the week, this also went for weed when I smoked in my teens/early twenties. But now I get shitty wasted on the weekends and get drunk so fast that my main goal of socializing and blowing off steam is truncated. I really have become tired of dealing with huge hang overs on Sunday only to roll into Monday and deal with the stress and BS from work. I wonder if spreading it out and becoming a liquor or beer snob who has a glass or two during the week might help curtail my worse habits. I've thought about giving it up too. Im secretly jealous of my friends who have hobbies and social activities that aren't based entirely around drinking. "Wow you guys went canoeing and didn't even drink? But you're still planning on getting hammered at the bar after right?"
I could apparently kill 34 Biebers in a fight. For some reason, this makes me feel my entire existence is now valid.
I ended up with 35 Biebers. All that training is finally paying off for the good of humanity. And I'm sure nobody else cares, but the Panthers just picked up another win. San Francisco is up next, gonna be a tough game. Time for more beer.