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11/22 Drunk Thread

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Nom Chompsky, Nov 22, 2013.

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  1. Parker

    Parker
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    Emotionally Jaded

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    No its a bitch when your work is based on clients that aren't working and you can't dick around watching YouTube in the office because these fuckers haven't upgraded the internet.

    It's also a bitch going from a company that gave me a lot of time off and wanted me to use, knowing employees with a healthy work/life balance are more productive than to one that's like "Oh fuck you."
     
  2. McSmallstuff

    McSmallstuff
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    6'3" 330lbs

    You fuckers know pretty much every thing about me. But I once fell off of the roof of a bar that is featured pretty much every time Mizzou plays a football game. Oh and my mother is still in love with the man that molested one of her children. With the holidays coming up she will probably wax poetic about how he was the love of her life, and be upset when I remind her if I see him again he dies.

    Toe sucking, I have done it with no problem. However I am horribly ticklish so stay the fuck away from my feet.
     
  3. happyfunball

    happyfunball
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    overly defenCive stuffed cougar

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    Wait, you're not small....

    I'm not opposed to sucking the toes per se, just be prepared for me to be laughing hysterically while I do it as all I'll be thinking about is how stupid and weird I look and feel. Of course, maybe that's another fetish.
     
  4. Now Slappy

    Now Slappy
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    Rule #34...
     
  5. Trickysista

    Trickysista
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    Disturbed

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    You know what's a bitch? When you take a $12,000 pay cut because you're moving out of the big city and back to the area in which you grew up only to realize that on top of your pay cut, your boss' motto is, "If you don't work, you don't get paid." So that means that even though I have off tomorrow and Friday, I will not be getting paid. Also, the office is closed the week between Christmas and New Years. Sweet, right? Nope. BECAUSE I DON'T GET PAID FOR THAT EITHER.

    I think I made more working part time in high school.

    On top of all that, I get to go out to Thanksgiving brunch? tomorrow at 11:30am with my husband's family. The place we're going to is serving family style. Do you know how gross that is?? Everyone passing around food that some restaurant threw together in a big pot?? I understand that's how most holiday dinners are at one's home, however, when I go out for a holiday, I want a damn buffet. I don't want to worry about taking the last roll and having my sister-in-law shoot me a dirty look because of it. There better be alcohol. Also, who makes a reservation for 11:30am on Thanksgiving? My husband's backwards family, that's who.
     
  6. Popped Cherries

    Popped Cherries
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    How dare you want to destroy one of the greatest MILF hunting spots in North America!


    I volunteered to work on Thanksgiving. Triple time and a half to go in and do just about nothing for 6 hours. Sign me up.
    To be honest, I don't understand why people get so angry about having to work a holiday. It's really not a big deal.
    If someone comes up with a really good reason that doesn't revolve around "It's the only time I get to see my whole family" I'd be open to having my mind changed.
    Until then, I'll continue to believe it's just a convenient reason to climb up on a cross and proclaim to the world you care about something.
     
  7. happyfunball

    happyfunball
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    overly defenCive stuffed cougar

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    You've never been in a Michael's, have you?
     
  8. toddamus

    toddamus
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    You must really love fat old grandmothers then. I guess its like licking butthole, hitting on fat grandmas is for some guys and not for others.

    If anything, Micheals is the worst place to go hitting milfs (God I hate that phrase).
     
  9. Crown Royal

    Crown Royal
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    Just call me Topher

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    Wal-Mart employees should have to work on every holiday, theyre too poor to afford food or presents anyway.

    What other store has four oout of the ten richest people in America as its owners and at the same holds fundraisers and food drives for its own employees?
     
  10. scotchcrotch

    scotchcrotch
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    The White Elephant at Walmart must be boring this year with everyone giving each other Walmart gift cards.
     
  11. TX.

    TX.
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    The Mad Pooper

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    Y'all...it's proving it be damn-near impossible to find an affordable suit that doesn't fit like absolute shit.
     
  12. Popped Cherries

    Popped Cherries
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    I'm telling you, go to Michael's and browse around for an hour. I bet you see more 35-45 year old hot housewives in a concentration you can't replicate anywhere else in public.
     
  13. Parker

    Parker
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    Or younger artsy hipster chicks that have very few sexual inhibitions.
     
  14. happyfunball

    happyfunball
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    overly defenCive stuffed cougar

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    Try women in their 50/60s that make their own Christmas presents so need to buy all the fake flowers.

    Wait, I might be thinking of AC Moore.
     
  15. Coke Bottle Casualty

    Coke Bottle Casualty
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    Aren't all three of those statutory holidays, where your employer has to legally pay you? How to stats work in PA? How does your boss handle the vacation time you accrue?
     
  16. Parker

    Parker
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    Sounds like you should get into advertising.
     
  17. Misanthropic

    Misanthropic
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    Around here, all you have to do is go to the local grocery stotre between 5:30 and 7 on a Wednesday, and you'll see plenty of 25-35 year old single women. Hell, one even picked me up. If it was that easy for me, it can be that easy for you.
     
  18. scotchcrotch

    scotchcrotch
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    Whole Foods if you want a challenge. Holy shit the amount of hubris in that place, it's where hipsters go to war with each other over the betterments of their specific lifestyle.

    I prefer picking women up at the Dollar Store.
     
  19. Jimmy James

    Jimmy James
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  20. Currer Bell

    Currer Bell
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    Couch vegging has commenced!!
     
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