The beginning of Commando might be the most out of place introduction in action movie history. Just Arnold and Alyssa Milano smashing ice cream cones in each other's faces to the tune of the dumbest "happy daddy-daughter day out" music the mid-eighties could come up with.
My two favorite Christmas movies: Emmitt Otters Jugband Christmas and A Very Murray Christmas. If you haven't seen the latter you're missing out. Also:
Yeah animals are no joke when they hit you. I used to run cross country. One time a deer came outta the brush and T-boned me, ran me right the fuck over. It wasn't as dramatic as that YouTube that's been going around lately of the kid and the deer, but it still hurt like a mother. Coach thought it was funny. Asshole.
A thousand apologies. Please be aware that the source I posted did not show a dead animal in the source picture. And, I don't know the mechanics of spoilering, which it should have been regardless. Please advise. None of the above is an excuse, just how it happened. Merry Christmas!
Is it weird that kind of turned me on? Maybe an odd comment but better than posting videos of horribly maimed animals
My wife is pregnant. After what felt like forever trying, some stuff was going wrong and we were *this* close to doing IVF. I can't tell anyone else (we're doing it on Xmas) so I'm sharing the excitement with y'all... except for maybe angel. She's probably still over that shit. Literally. Merry Xmas TiB. I'm basically crying right now.
Congratulations! Being responsible for a tiny human whose totally dependant on you for everything is awesome. I wouldn't trade it for anything. My only parenting advice: Go buy "Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child" and read it. Then start sleep training at 6 weeks. Don't wait until your kid's 4.5 months old and your wife is up crying at 3:00am because she hasn't had any sleep for a week and is trying to get the baby to go to sleep; then try to find said book that your friends gave you and read it the next day......those things may or may not have happened to me.
Or you just have a horribly clingy baby and everything seems fines sleeps through the night or till at least 6 am in one go then one night just says fuck it all will not sleep without being in your bed.
My 2 year old son puts himself to bed at 8:00. He sleeps until about 7:30 or 8. Working in preschool administration for the better part of two decades now has been invaluable to me as a parent. Just the experience, and having the tools to be able to try different things and different approaches (hint: 99.9 percent of what you read is complete bullshit; you know your kid better than any book does so just use common sense and then give them as much love and emotional support and self confidence as you possibly can).
My wife has now gone through 4 piss sticks. Apparently she thinks the results are magically gonna be different on one of them. That shit costs money though. One would do. The way I found out it was 4 was when I found them lying on the stove top. And when she pick them up there was piss drippings. Yeah I don't care how preggo you are. Leaving urine where I cook is grounds for me fucking with you. Just put some cayenne in her non-alcoholic beer.
Phew, dodged a bullet there - because IVF is just a tiny bit more expensive than home pregnancy tests. And, FYI, if you have a two year old son, and based on when you started talking about it here, you haven't actually been trying that long, imo.
Been trying a year. But she never ovulated (until the last time, which is when I knocked her up). The doctors didn't know what was wrong, why the eggs weren't dropping, and they couldn't find anything on the scans so the next step was exploratory surgery. Our best guess is that she the IUD (or as I call it now, her IED) screwed with her system. Regardless, I'm getting the snip snip assuming this one hits the ground healthy.
Is anyone else watching this Scientology series with Leah Remini on A&E? I love this shit. It's one of my guilty pleasures. I got tons of crap last year for putting her book on my Christmas list.
In college I was the sound guy on a student documentary a friend did about Scientology (this was during the big Anonymous protests). Got to sit in on a bunch of interviews and was present at a few of the protests. Scientology are a bunch of weird and aggressive fuckers.