I'm picturing him crying like a girl every time he wipes. I'm betting he'll invest in a bidet before all is said and done. You're on some pretty amazing pain medication, though, right? That must mix well with the booze.
I can't run, I'll tell you that. It hurts to even bend my knees when I walk so I have the stick-my-my-ass strut that moistens the ladies on eye contact. As a bonus, it's all snow and ice here now so slipping on the ice outside in any way just feels ooooooooooooooooh so good. I can get around okay. I have to crawl up staircases which looks kind of silly. I think my favourite part so far was my doctor making me immedietly walk down the street to an ATM (not far enough to drive of course) because he only accepts cash for excuse notes. Nice, huh? I was given Tylonel 3's, which is latin for "placebo". They are laughably weak painkillers, I'll probably hardly use them.
What I am saying is that they ARE terrible. They don't take away pain, but still give you a burst of that "medicated high" that I hate. I'll never understand why people enjoy painkillers and downers as a recreational drug-- with the exception of methaqualone.
Don't blame codeine, it never did anything to you*. Blame god for giving you inadequate expression of CYP 2D6. *except constipation. Watch out for that.
Oh, yeah, Tylenol 3 is fucking useless. That is the kind of stuff they give ten year olds as "good painkillers." You need to go back and demand some of the good stuff. How in the fucking fuck could they only give you Tylenol 3? After I threw my back out, they put me on a muscle relaxer and a pain killer. I remember leaving the hospital, and then I woke up seven hours later and I couldn't move. According to my roommate at the time, I was up, walking around, makings snacks, and watching movies. I don't know how it was possible because when I woke up I literally couldn't movie at all. I wish I remember what it was that they gave me, because holy shit it worked. I also got Vicodin for my kidney stones. That stuff made me happy when I took it, although I was always wary of getting hooked so I took it very rarely .
Because I asked my doctor to put on "light duty" at work instead of short-term disability, so he said I have "No business" needing strong painkillers. Obviously he has no idea how much it hurts. I still have my OWN signature brand of medicine. And believe me, it helps. I don't know what they put in perscription-strength muscle relaxers, but whatever it is it scares the shit out of me. Those things cheat the fabric of nature and was probably the explanation of why you were so chipper for a brief period. They also make people nuts sometimes, so tread cautiously.
I agree. When I'm asked if I want a prescription of Tylanol-3 for something I just tell my doctor not to bother. Unfortunately, my body develops tolerance to painkillers pretty quickly. Percocets don't to anything for me either, and I have some sort of abdominal injury that Vicodin doesn't do shit for.
Oh yeah, the muscle relaxer is something I haven't been on since. The stuff I was on was directly from the hospital, it wasn't even a prescription (or at least a prescription I filled). They gave me the muscle relaxer and pain killer and sent me on my way, and it didn't fully kick in until I got home, at which point I was apparently happier than I've ever been. Semi-related note: I'm drunk, and its good. Unfortunately, I just want to play some video games, but my wife is watching Pride and Prejudice on my PS3. What a bunch of bullshit.
I think what's also hilarious is on that rare occasion I do break something, it's never anything you can cast or that heals properly. My ribs, my toes, my tailbone, and I have a permanent bone chip in my left elbow. I never get the classic forearm or lower leg fracture that every other person I know got (not to say that those are fun, I imagine they probably aren't).
You guys should look into meditation. Pain is only an artefact your nervous system creates. With enough mind control you can stop those nerve impulses. Big Pharma is profiting from keeping you ignorant of your own body's capacity to heal itself.
I try to put all my focus in the front of my brain, but the rest of it keeps shouting "YOU HAVE A BROKEN BONE AT THE BOTTOM OF YOUR SPINE, FOCUS ONLY ON THAT ENTIRELY!!!!!!" Of course, maybe meditation COULD help me focus. After all, the way of Buddha allowed Tiger Woods to focus his entire concentration on fucking every single waitress and porn star in America that smells like ammonia.
If I meditate for a couple of hours I can read one of your posts and not come away thinking you're a twat. Only one though.
You know Crown, what GA says is true. What you need is high dose of your body's natural painkiller: endorphins! So go get yourself a runner's high! Just keep running until all the pain is gone.
That's nice. You guys go back to talking about how you're afraid of getting addicted to powerful painkillers but also how dare doctors prescribe powerful painkillers so liberally.
Wasn't part of that, however the two concepts don't seem mutually exclusive. I would like to see lazy GP's cutting back on prescribing antibiotics to every hypochondriac panty waste who has a sniffle, but that’s another story.