So, you can't drink AND you have to participate in impossibly gay and unecessary bullshit that kids in grade seven find childish? If you don't start drinking....NOW...I'm going to personally swim to your fucking country and force a funnell down your throat. You think I'm LYING, don't you? I wouldn't blame you for punching holes in the walls of your house right now. What a bunch of cockclowns.
Strange, I didn't read "Asshole To End All Assholes For Eternity" in there, but other than that I couldn't put it better myself. Worship that? I'll sooner start a church dedicated to Vlad III.
Don't get me wrong I love my family but not all at once in the same room and not right now two days after a break up that absolutely no one who knew us saw coming at all much less myself. I've currently hidden myself away from everyone and will make up for lost time drinking very shortly.
All I know is this is my first Christmas clean and sober... And I'm sitting in my camp room in Fort Mac. Worked today, working tomorrow. "I know mom, it's terrible, but I have to work during Christmas, no way around it!" 5 minutes earlier... "Hey Ron, you want me to work over Christmas for you?"
You mean your family doesn't come up with drinking games like Quiddish pong? Man you people are doing it wrong.
He died on the cross so rappers could dress like huge assholes. Or, in the case of nowadays, white guys. And the Jews gave you guys something else: every single sitcom about a black or hispanic family. And they make everybody else on the planet look like great athletes.
I'm only posting this because it was specifically requested by Crown Royal. Gloria in excelsis deo...bitches.
Maybe you would like it if I slit your stomach open with a gas saw and paid homeless guys to blow their HPV-riddled loads in the open wound. Fuck that chubby whore and her no-talent teenager husband. They deserve each other.
I hate Santa Claus. His "belly that shook like a bowl full of jelly"? Aka Diabetes. The only thing Santa is getting this year is an amputation.
It is now officially Christmas Day here. So, Merry Christmas you twisted, degenerate comedians. I can't think of a more entertaining family to party with over the holidays. Now, pass the eggnog spiked with mouthwash. It's BUSINESS time.
Did you guys know Deborah Ann Woll's fiance is blind? Imagine being the only guy who actually gets the honour of seeing her naked...and you STILL don't get to see her naked.
No' Sack, its cause I don't like half the people in my house right now. Currently they're downstairs doing Christmassy stuff, meanwhile I'm upstairs killing time and drinking. My older brother is a miserly whiner, everything is too expensive to him. Apparently he can't go go-karting because it costs too much, I didn't know my brother was a Jew but shalom. My brother in law is a whiner, and gets on my nerves like a cold. At first he's not too bad but he wears on ya, with little bitchy comments here and there. Then there's my mom, who I tolerate best of all, but like least. I've detailed her issues before. Thats not to say I'm a saint. I'm flawed, deeply. I acknowledge this. However, I know where I'm comfortable and where I'm not. I'd rather be by myself, watching Duck Dynasty, with a bourbon then downstairs watching some crappy xmas movie making small talk with people who annoy me. Simple really.
Merry Christmas all. The wife went to sleep, so I put on Bad Santa. The holiday's off to a good start!
Watching White Christmas. I'm a huge fan of Danny Kaye. And Rosemary Clooney looks like Nathan Lane in drag.
Merry Christmas Idiots. Dinner was awesome. Indulged in Christmas movies on the tube, discovered egg nog and Sailor Jerry and I'm feeling pretty good right now. Isn't it time for a NSFCMC post Black Jesus?
I've listened to Merry Christmas to You AND Merry Christmas II You. I don't care if you don't like Mariah Carey, you can't deny she's an excellent singer that can hit notes only a few singers have ever hit. And if you do, it must be because you're an asshole. Merry Christmas idiots.
I don't understand the whole "Mariah Carey can hit notes in the stratosphere" thing. I've heard singers hit those notes before. Hell, I'VE hit those notes before. It's called tightening your vocal cords so far that your voice squeak, and she's just really good at controlling it.
I thought the thing with Mariah is that she had a really wide range for a pop singer? She seems kinda annoying though.