When you look at it from a studio's perspective, Sandler is a goddamn money printing machine. Look at the box offices on his live action starring roles since 2010. Blended made $126.8 million box office on a $40 million budget. Grown Ups 2? $247 on $80. Jack and Jill? $150 on $79. Just Go With It? $215 on $80. Grown Ups? $271 on $80. Only stinker in there was That's My Boy ($58 on $70). Even knowing that studio budgets tend to be underreported, that's an insane return, before even accounting for the home video markets. If anyone wants him to go away, all you have to do is stop buying tickets to his schlock.
Fortunately for him, there is no such thing as a finite amount of stupid people. Every single movie you listed there as funny as charbroiling a live puppy. If he shrieked into a bag of his own shit it would make some already-rich assholes even richer, and allowing us to discover such 400-pound-gorilla comic talent like Nick Swardson. The funniest thing about his movies is trying to accept that the women he's paired with would want somebody who looks and acts like him in real life.
At the risk of sounding like KIMaster, none of his movies are that good, that includes Billy Madison and Happy Gilmore. Most people like those movies because they liked them when they were growing up in the 90s and have nostalgia goggles on. Click was decent as was Punch Drunk Love, but thats as good as it gets with his movies, and both of those are forgettable. He became pretty successful through SNL and rode the wave from there.
There was no reason to like him on SNL either. He ISN'T FUNNY. The only movie with him I loved was Wedding Singer, his character was appealing and the digs that movie took at the 80's were great.
I think his movies are pretty bad too, but I sure don't blame him for continuing to make them. If I had his formula for success I wouldn't change a thing and just keep cranking out shitty money-makers too, no question whatsoever.
His next four films will be released on Netflix, not sure what kind of budget they will let him have.
I tried to hop a chain link fence at the soccer tournament on Saturday and, instead of gracefully leaping over it, I caught my foot and fell like a graceful pile of bricks. On the plus side, I scratched the shit out of my inner thigh and now it looks like I tried to get blown by a pissed off cougar.
I watched the "guy with the shovel" marching behind the horses in the Santa Claus parade this weekend be so wrapped up in hitting on some girl in the crowd that he neglected to notice the horse shit in front of him, slipped in it and fell on his ass thus making the entire parade pause to wait for him to resolve himself. I guess what I'm saying is, at least you didn't shit yourself.
Those things were so easy to climb when your feet were still small enough to fit in the little holes, yes?
That could be the last thing anyone ever says after they have a bad day. "Well, my wife banged her personal trainer, I got fired, and they repossessed my car, but at least I didn't shit myself"
Gotta take those small victories when they come, I guess. At your age, I'm pretty sure the sphincters are the next thing to go. Isn't that right, Rush?
When I was a senior in high school, I was 5-10 and one of my good friends was 6-3. We had a "senior patio" where we got to eat outside, while the other students had to eat inside. We would goof around with slap games and general stupid fun. One thing I used to do with my buddy was this: he would stand straight still with his arms at his side facing me, and I would run right at him. I would jump, place my hands on his shoulders and vault myself right over, landing like a rock star to much applause. Ok, no applause. But, it was fun to do, and it looked more impressive than it really was. A couple years ago, we had our 25th reunion, and we took a tour of the school to see how it had changed. We were standing out on that patio, and he said, remember when you used to do ^^ that thing ^^? I laughed and one of my other friends said he bet I couldn't still do it. So, I tried. I may have lost a step in 25+ years . . . I proceeded to plant my groin right in his face, not clearing his head, and knocking us both to the ground. It was not pretty. I think one of the girls in my class got a picture at impact and posted it on facebook.