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2014 CHRISTMAS AND NEW YEARS DRUNK THREAD (NSFW)

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Juice, Dec 1, 2014.

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  1. bewildered

    bewildered
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    Deeply satisfied pooper

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    Babies can't be conceived in your asshole, can they? I need to double check with a pharmacist because I am not smart enough to figure this out on my own.
     
  2. Frebis

    Frebis
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    Emotionally Jaded

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    This is why you shouldnt wipe back to front specifically after butt sex.
     
  3. bewildered

    bewildered
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    Deeply satisfied pooper

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    My baby is going to come out black, isn't it?
     
  4. Revengeofthenerds

    Revengeofthenerds
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    ER Frequent Flyer Platinum Member

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    Just make sure it can breath.
     
  5. bewildered

    bewildered
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    Deeply satisfied pooper

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    So...blue?
     
  6. Luke 217

    Luke 217
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    Disturbed

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    I just took receipt of about 200 lbs of deer meat a month or so ago,,,,, and its all corn and soybean fed shit. Fucking amazing. I dry cured some into salami... 5 lbs of it, already gone. People are losing their shit over it.
    I'll probably make about 50 lbs of it. Perfect holiday present for people I give shit about.

    Question for you hunters and eaters of Venison: Is there a difference when you shoot these things how they taste. I'd guess that getting a buck in rut would make it taste different.
     
  7. Kubla Kahn

    Kubla Kahn
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    Did I just shit myself?

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    More hunters wives tales. Though they do shed quite a bit of weight so maybe they are leaner? I got a young bucks few years ago and a decent mid aged buck this season and so far I don't taste any difference between either of them and the does I've gotten.
     
  8. Luke 217

    Luke 217
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    Disturbed

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    Yeah, I was just speculating. I know when I have more testosterone running through me the wife says I taste like rhino horn aioli coming out of an untethered fire hose. Guess it doesn't apply to ten pointers.
     
  9. shimmered

    shimmered
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    Just ate a burrito and a cheeseburger. not even sorry.
     
  10. Crown Royal

    Crown Royal
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    Just call me Topher

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    As much as I like buying beer in Quebec Costco, I hate the way people shop here. So damn inconsiderate: they'll just abandon their carts to walk halfway across the store to grab something, blocking you in the aisle. Then when I push their cart out of my way, the douche screams at me like the cart is his property. Fuck you Pepi, pay attention to your surroundings. You're in between me and beer, feel lucky I don't knife you like fucking Screech.
     
  11. JoeCanada

    JoeCanada
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    I think I'm getting more Canadian. I had a tire blow out on a snowy highway the other day and spilled my Tim Horton's coffee. Then some guy saw me from his house like 300 feet away and came to help. Thanks to him, I wasn't late for the curling tournament I was going to.

    Also, curling is awesome. I had never done it before (it was a "for fun" tournament, we were all drunk and terrible) but I'm going to try to join a league when I get home.
     
  12. Crown Royal

    Crown Royal
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    Just call me Topher

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    I thought curling was like golf: fun to play, boring as fuck to watch. But you can get drunk playing both.

    Here in Ottawa it there is no snow, above zero. Crazy.

    We're staying with my wife's grandmother. This 92 year old British battle-axe starts off every morning with a double Harvey Wallbanger and sans-filter cigarette for breakfast. Today my wife and I we treated to a 20-minute railing against the untrustworthy homosexuals. She still cleans her own gutters and shovels her own snow. To say she doesn't gives a fuck is an understatement. She makes for awkward conversation a LOT.
     
  13. happyfunball

    happyfunball
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    overly defenCive stuffed cougar

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    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]

    [​IMG]



    I'm guessing all you Canadians break the curve for niceness? Except Joe. He seems sorta nice. The rest of you guys seem cranky.
     
  14. Nettdata

    Nettdata
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    Mr. Toast

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    -3 and 15cm of snow... it's awesome here. Making some spicy turkey and leek and potato soup and drinking in front of the fireplace.

    Great day.
     
  15. Crown Royal

    Crown Royal
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    Just call me Topher

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    Somebody play some Savage Garden.
     

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  16. Nettdata

    Nettdata
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    Mr. Toast

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    Just did some Yuletide Server Updates, drunk, without testing them first. Because that's how I roll.

    So if you noticed a slight hiccup, well, I don't want to hear about it.

    Merry Christmas.
     
  17. Angel_1756

    Angel_1756
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    The Big Four-Oh

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    Seriously? It's like 7 degrees here. I walked to the mailbox in a t-shirt and yoga pants before.
    I'm jealous of your snow.
     
  18. CanisDirus

    CanisDirus
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    I just had to clear five inches of snow off of my new Dish-dish to get the TV to work again. Considering I have thirty or so feet to the ground from the roof, and the slickness of the wet snow, it was pretty spooky if I would have fallen, but I kept to all fours and went slow. Getting back down was the bitch, the roof is highly angled, and I basically half-slipped, half-climbed down back to my ladder.
     
  19. happyfunball

    happyfunball
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    overly defenCive stuffed cougar

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    We doing weather reports?

    It was a little chilly in the shade today.

    I know this because I had to take my daughter dress shopping today ("Mom, can we go Saturday instead?" "Sure hon, no problem", my ass). Do NOT go shopping at the outdoor mall the first Saturday after Christmas. It was awful. Parking was ridiculous. But the SALES!
     
  20. jdoogie

    jdoogie
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    Finally back home after a week of running back and forth between the families and all I want to do is sit back and relax with a nice beer or two but I can't because I have to be up early to go to a 3 Floyd's tasting event at 9am. #FirstWorldProblems
     
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