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2014 Thanksgiving Drunk Thread

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Juice, Nov 21, 2014.

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  1. Kubla Kahn

    Kubla Kahn
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    Did I just shit myself?

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    I did not come down here just to get jerked off!
     
    #241 Kubla Kahn, Nov 28, 2014
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 27, 2015
  2. JWags

    JWags
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    Emotionally Jaded

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    I was really proud of how worldly I'd become when I was able to distinguish between Australian and Kiwi accents, as well as decipher most of the regions of England.

    Best: Almost any of the English accent derivatives besides Cockney and Scouser (love LFC but I dont need a girl talking about "I love me family"); South African, Dutch, any of the Nordic countries cause they all speak great almost accented English but there is a cool tinge to it, and Deep but not inbred Southern.

    Worst: French (its a beautiful language, but people speaking English with a heavy French accent sound like they are drooling or having a stroke), Asian, Southie Boston, Northern Wisconsin/Minnesota
     
  3. Nettdata

    Nettdata
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    Mr. Toast

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    Someone's gonna get whacked over this one:

    http://sanfrancisco.cbslocal.com/2014/1 ... y-mystery/

    "So yeah... I know we were on the way to buy that meth, but we were running a bit early and got hungry and stopped off at the BK for a bite... it's not like were stupid or anything, we didn't leave it in the car. But yeah, it gone."
     
  4. wexton

    wexton
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    Fixed that for you.
     
  5. Angel_1756

    Angel_1756
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    The Big Four-Oh

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    So... if a stag and doe is planned for tomorrow night... and the groom-to-be's relationship status just changed from "engaged" to "it's complicated" to "in an open relationship"... Do I get my money back for the ticket I bought?
     
  6. TX.

    TX.
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    The Mad Pooper

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    Most Favorite: New Zealand tied with South African
    Least: Any Asian language

    Hope everyone's recovering from yesterday's festivities. Even after running and yoga I still have a food hangover and feel like I have a dressing baby. I'm gross.
     
  7. Now Slappy

    Now Slappy
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    I would call whomever you're friends with (bride or groom) and get the real story…and then ask for your money back.
     
  8. Whatthe...

    Whatthe...
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    Experienced Idiot

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    I say you go anyway. I went to a "not wedding" once when my buddy called off his destination wedding. Just the grooms men and some of the grooms friends ended up going, and his ex-fiance's aunt and uncle who nobody told that the groom was still going to Antigua. The look on his face when her aunt and uncle walked into the boarding lounge at the airport was priceless.

    On that note. Who has these stag and doe parties? Never in a million years would I have wanted my wife to come along to my stag, nor me go to hers. I've always thought they stem from some type of insecurity that the other party is going to go to the strippers/eat out a stripper/blow a stripper/something along those lines.
     
  9. Angel_1756

    Angel_1756
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    The Big Four-Oh

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    Ah, to clarify for those unfamiliar - a "stag and doe" is not the same as a "stag/stagette night". A stag and doe is effectively a fundraiser that's held to "help the bride and groom raise money for their wedding". Tickets are usually $10-20, drinks are cheap, prizes and games are played, and a few grand goes into the coffers.

    I actually loathe the idea of hitting up friends (who you aren't going to invite to said wedding in the first place) for money so you can have an extra tier of wedding cake "on your special day", but I'm a fucking wedding grinch, so meh.
     
  10. Crown Royal

    Crown Royal
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    Just call me Topher

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    People who aren't invited to the wedding still like stag & does. It offers a cheaper night out drinking, you're usually around a lot of familiar faces or you could use it for a more social pre-game before hitting the bar scene. The idea is to invite as many people as you can to make as much money as you can.

    People either like them or they don't. In small towns they are staples, I book more of them than I do weddings, easily. I think people like them because they can go hear music without OONTZ OONTZ OONTZ OONTZ OONTZ OONTZ OONTZ OONTZ
     
  11. Angel_1756

    Angel_1756
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    The Big Four-Oh

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    True - I know people who basically plan their social calendars around the stag and does that get listed in the local paper.

    I'm not that girl. If you're too poor to get married and you want to cut me a cheque, it's going to take more than $3 Budweiser and the prospect of winning a Texas Mickey if I toss a toonie closest to the bottle from 50 feet.
     
  12. Crown Royal

    Crown Royal
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    Just call me Topher

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    It's amusing when rich people have them. This one I did had twenty-five liquor bottles and four X-Boxes as door prizes. No shit.
     
  13. Angel_1756

    Angel_1756
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    The Big Four-Oh

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    It's also amusing when not-rich people have them, and the prize table contains such luxurious offerings as "a jar of spaghetti sauce" and "two packs of guitar strings".
     
  14. Crown Royal

    Crown Royal
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    Just call me Topher

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    Oh shit, the homemade prizes. Wool socks wrapped in a hand-knitted doily and tied with leftover Easter ribbon was a personal fave of mine. They only had Lucky Lager and Lakeport as the beers. The future bride and groom were NOT a handsome couple that night.
     
  15. silway

    silway
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    If they're still getting married, then I would think the party's still on.
     
  16. Angel_1756

    Angel_1756
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    The Big Four-Oh

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    Reminds me of a wedding my girlfriend went to where the dinner was buckets of KFC on the table "with all the fixin's" and the "midnight buffet" was bags of Wonder Bread, packs of bologne and bottles of French's mustard.
     
  17. Crown Royal

    Crown Royal
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    Just call me Topher

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    Midnight buffet must be Pizza or Chinese. Everyone knows that.

    That sounds like a fairy tale bash. I hope the groom wore a nice tuxedo t-shirt.
     
  18. Jimmy James

    Jimmy James
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    Weddings can blow me. More specifically, paying a shitload of money to feed a bunch of people that are only there out of a vague feeling of obligation and will talk shit about you if you aren't providing free top shelf liquor and caviar.

    I will recommend to the day I die an elopement package at a really nice hotel then spend your money on a kickass honeymoon instead. Weddings aren't about other people, they're about you and your partner. No shitty blender or whatever it is you put on the register nobody will bother to use is worth the stress of trying to make everybody else happy, so don't.
     
  19. ghettoastronaut

    ghettoastronaut
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    An important message from Jennifer Lawrence:

    [​IMG]
     
  20. katokoch

    katokoch
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    After hearing enough horseshit from family over when my girlfriend and I may or may not get engaged, I've started openly threatening to elope. Or just run away from it all and spend the rest of my days hunting and fishing. Eh. We'll see.
     
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