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2017 Holiday Drunk Thread NSFW

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Juice, Dec 1, 2017.

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  1. Revengeofthenerds

    Revengeofthenerds
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    ER Frequent Flyer Platinum Member

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    I'm just trying to figure out how to tell my wife that the real reason I'm upset is that one of my favorite porn stars just died.
     
    #101 Revengeofthenerds, Dec 6, 2017
  2. Nettdata

    Nettdata
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    Mr. Toast

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    "Honey? You know how I whack off to that chick that does all the stuff that you don't do, and looks way hotter? Yeah... she died today..."

    Your wife will actually appreciate it.
     
    #102 Nettdata, Dec 6, 2017
  3. Revengeofthenerds

    Revengeofthenerds
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    Actually, I like her because she looks damn near like my wife except with fake tits and lips.

    Yup, have fun with that armchair psychologists!
     
    #103 Revengeofthenerds, Dec 6, 2017
  4. Nettdata

    Nettdata
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    Mr. Toast

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    My ex-wife looks like a slightly less bouncy version of Gianna Michaels.

    I was OK with that. Like, very OK.
     
    #104 Nettdata, Dec 6, 2017
  5. Revengeofthenerds

    Revengeofthenerds
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    Googled her and my phone is now infected with bi-polar and leather bondage.

    What the fuck man?!?
     
    #105 Revengeofthenerds, Dec 6, 2017
  6. Nettdata

    Nettdata
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    Mr. Toast

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    I think you spelled, "fucken' eh man!" wrong.
     
    #106 Nettdata, Dec 6, 2017
  7. Revengeofthenerds

    Revengeofthenerds
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    I think you spelled "fucking a man" wrong.
     
    #107 Revengeofthenerds, Dec 6, 2017
  8. Nettdata

    Nettdata
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    Mr. Toast

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    That's your brain tumour talking.
     
    #108 Nettdata, Dec 6, 2017
  9. Revengeofthenerds

    Revengeofthenerds
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    Ok now you're just spelling wrong.
     
    #109 Revengeofthenerds, Dec 6, 2017
  10. Nettdata

    Nettdata
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    Mr. Toast

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    I be spellin wright.
     
    #110 Nettdata, Dec 6, 2017
  11. Rush-O-Matic

    Rush-O-Matic
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    Emotionally Jaded

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    Can't you just get a giant bald eagle on your back, wings spread, with a huge set of dick and balls? Maybe about to eat a baby armadillo? And, at sunset.
     
    #111 Rush-O-Matic, Dec 6, 2017
  12. Nettdata

    Nettdata
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    Mr. Toast

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    If anyone ever NEEDED to have a bald eagle with truck nuts attached in full colour on their back...
     
    #112 Nettdata, Dec 6, 2017
  13. Nettdata

    Nettdata
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    Mr. Toast

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    So I think I'm way too fucking drunk for a Wednesday night...

    I'm dealing with two large commercial clients, and they're both fucking idiots... 16 hour days sneak up on you, and I do believe me finishing the last of my Captain Morgan is a sign...

    Now that I really stop and introspect... I do believe I may have bed spins tonight.

    Wow... I really did not see that coming...
     
    #113 Nettdata, Dec 6, 2017
  14. Revengeofthenerds

    Revengeofthenerds
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    I do have a version of the Gadsden flag with a rattlesnake on it (instead of the original Timber Rattlesnake) on my chest. Every bit of it has personal meaning, none of it that militia "fuck the government" shit you normally associate with that flag, but it still looks very redneck when you first look at it.
     
    #114 Revengeofthenerds, Dec 6, 2017
  15. Nettdata

    Nettdata
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    I'm somewhat disappointed that it's not this:

    [​IMG]
     
    #115 Nettdata, Dec 6, 2017
  16. Revengeofthenerds

    Revengeofthenerds
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    Some part of me truly hopes that Trump is in the plane that inevitably drops a nuke on NK, and then poses for a photo op in the pilot's seat after it with two thumbs up, and then tweets out the photo. And then someone gets that photo tattooed on them.
     
    #116 Revengeofthenerds, Dec 6, 2017
  17. Nettdata

    Nettdata
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    Mr. Toast

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    WHERE ARE ALL THE DRUNK PEOPLE AT?!?!?!?
     
    #117 Nettdata, Dec 6, 2017
  18. Nettdata

    Nettdata
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    Mr. Toast

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    We need more tit pics around here... I'm sure @Rush-O-Matic will agree...
     
    #118 Nettdata, Dec 6, 2017
  19. Rush-O-Matic

    Rush-O-Matic
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    Posting (female) titty pics is always a good idea. You'll get no argument from me.
     
    #119 Rush-O-Matic, Dec 6, 2017
  20. Juice

    Juice
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    My aunt gave me shit last night about whether or not I want to cut the umbilical cord. I do not. I dont want any part of it. She claims its a "bonding process." No it isnt. Its a nutrient tube and I dont want cut it.
     
    #120 Juice, Dec 7, 2017
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