I thinks it's the smell of pickles the turn people off. I like them, but like my wife with onions it's like a zombie bite if it comes in contact with anything.
I started putting more spinach on sandwiches... not enough to make a salad out of it but it stays in place a lot better than the shredded mess. Tomatoes used to be a meal ruiner for me, not so much anymore. I'm not much of a fan of olives though and they can spread their briny juice all over. My girlfriend eats them out of the can... *gag* Sauerkraut is another thing she loves and I hate.
A tradition unlike any other...assholes who play 2 rounds of golf a year posting obnoxious statuses about how they aren't gonna get any work done cause the Masters is on. A spring clusterfuck of posers only rivaled by baseball opening day which is loudly populated by idiots who follow baseball for the first week, then disappear till fall but are the first to defend its entirely too long season as necessary and talk about it like it has some fucking magic and mystique. That being said, the Masters is a great tournament and I look forward to day drinking and watching rounds 3-4 on Sat/Sunday.
Eiffel Tower? I hardly know 'er Alison Brie is hilariously sexy and talented and it's brilliantly summed up in that 5 second gif. To (convincingly) make a pantomime of jerking / licking two dongs simultaneously dirty and funny is a gift. Edit: Okay, well I still think Alison Brie is hilariously sexy and talented . . . but, after seeing the outtakes, it's not what I thought. I mean, I'm sure she was playing along, because obvioulsy Joel McHale et al were doing it, too, in the other takes. She was supposed to be stabbing two people with a knife and the blood was spraying on her face, which they told her off-camera "no, it tastes terrible." Still funny.
While I can appreciate golf for the righteous opportunity to day-drink, wear silly pants and for it's relatively difficult skill, I cannot watch it without sleeping. Fuck mayonnaise and most white condiments in general. Duke's seems to have a cult following in my hometown and people who otherwise can't stand mayo consume this by the gallon. Nope, I'm not falling for it. The only exception is wasabi mayo, spicy ranch and Zaxby's sauce. Everything else containing mayo can fuck off. I can't believe I finished Peace Corps service 4 years ago. I'm celebrating by drinking tap water, using the internet, having the lights and A/C on at the same time and not shitting blood. Good times.
Proper mayonnaise is NOT white, people. Hellmann's is just paint disguised as mayo. THIS is the real stuff: The background there is white, the mayo quite clearly isn't (the glass jar is clear, not tinted in any way). Wasabi is also some good stuff, but why make mayo out of it? Seems odd to me. Then again, I like hot mustard, so maybe that's it.
I too used to have a distaste for slimy tomatoes on things. Ive grown to like them in applications I didn't used to. Homegrown ones blow the supermarket tasteless ones out of the water any day of the week. Also fuck olives the vinegar brine fucking pollutes anything they are put on. Dirty martini drinkers are obviously deviant sociopaths. As for other condiments anyone else think ketchup should be stopped being used on hot dogs the day your mommy stops cutting them up for you? I go straight mustard, which is mustards only real application for me since it over powers everything else it is put on like hamburgers. With brats and mets it's heavy sauerkraut and heavy mustard with onions. Fuck it.
Congrats on doing absolutely nothing to make it seem less appealing. I'm not staunchly anti-mayo, but I don't have it in my fridge, ever really, and am inclined to be annoyed if there is too much. I think the movement away from it came from my college dining halls seemingly only having the Hellmans Mayo Dressing packets. It had a disturbing tangy flavor, shit was revolting. One of my best friends is massively anti-white condiments. No mayo, no ranch of any sort, no sour cream, no white aoilis. Its a tad bit odd. Ranch is whatever, but eating mexican food without sour cream is just unconscionable for me. He eats ketchup by the gallon though. Guess he needs HFCS in his condiments.
I tolerate ranch. But I'm also an anti white condiments person. Mostly, no mayo or sour cream. Why is it sour? Why is cream allowed to be sour? Ketchup is awesome on most things, but because I'm not 6, I limit it to fried foods and hamburgers. If I must have a hot dog, spicy mustard, sauerkraut, and onions will do. If I'm getting one at a hot dog cart in New York, spicy mustard and the onions in the sauce is the best thing ever.
I have nothing against Ranch or sour cream. Mayo... No. I use a micro amount with tuna, I like it better dry anyways. Wendy's should be shot and pissed on for putting mayo on burgers. You actually have to request it removed, shouldn't it be the other way around? Mayo does not belong on hamburgers. That is an abomination in my eyes. It's like telling your kids you're taking them to Disneyworld and you pull into the parking lot of their dentist.
Mayo with Sriracha or Chipotle Tabasco mixed in is friggin' awesome on sandwiches and burgers and stuff. Try that before hating all mayo. Too much of any condiment bothers me with one exception, and that is tangy barbecue sauce slathered over most anything grilled or barbecued. I like it more vinegary and spicy than sweet too, whenever I visit Kansas City I come home with a bunch. I use it in place of pretty much anything you'd put ketchup on.
Extra mayo, extra sour cream, extra dressing. I also dip my fries in honey mustard. The sloppier my food is the better. I will have ketchup AND mayo on my burgers. I will also put ketchup AND mustard on my hot dogs. Although I'm not a big fan of hot dogs in general. Mushrooms and raisins should be banned. Also, these things: Are delicious. I eat the outside caramel first, then pop the sugary goodness in my mouth last to savor. And when I eat those Easter Robin's Eggs, I have to bite them in half, then stick my tongue on the malt and suck it out. It melts in your mouth! And that leaves the hard candy shell to eat last. And I can easily eat a whole bag in one sitting. I'm so fucking hungry. I can't eat right now and woke up with hunger pains. All this food talk is torture. Torture.
Spread the goodness Isn't mayo just oil and eggs whipped together with a little lemon juice? Why is that revolting? I don't "use it," I just eat it. I mean, the next thing you'll say is that the stuff in oreos is disgusting, just because it's lard and sugar mixed together. Pfff.
YOU SHUT YOUR PIEHOLE, RUSH. OREOS ARE AMBROSIA. I WILL NOT HEAR SLANDER ABOUT THE WHITE CREAMY FILLING.
For someone who hates mayo like myself, London was a borderline uncomfortable food experience. They literally put it on everything out there. I'm pretty sure they even use it for lube.
Re: Spread the goodness Raisin are just grapes. Grapes are delicious, raisins taste like mouse turds mixed with spent fuel rods. A beautiful child CAN become a serial killer.
Doesn't stop there. When I eat bananas after I take a bite I have to stick my tongue in the center so that it breaks evenly into three parts and when I eat raspberries I have to stick my tongue in the center of them where the hole is. It's like coolness on my tongue. I guess I should point out here it's not like people know I'm doing this stuff. I have some class. And as someone who makes icing, it's lard and confectioners' sugar basically. And delicious. Oh so delicious. Double stuff all the way.