Hey y'all...I heard a great line to pick up chicks today. We have tortilla soup that's actually pretty decent at work. Attendings eat for free. One doofus is going around bragging to any gal who's around that he can hook them up with free soup. "You know I can get you tortilla soup for free, right? You and all of your friends. 'Cause I get it for free. Just let me know." Oh, yeah...free soup at work. Panty dropper!
Weird request I got last night. Dude: Can you give me some tape please, 2 pieces. Me: Why do you want 2 pieces of tape Dude: I am going to tape these 10 dollar bills on my wifes tits so she can show them to the band and tip them Me: request granted
My sister in law picked up my kids a while ago. I've been rocking out to 90s music and cleaning house since they left. I just opened a beer and it's lukewarm. I think I'm doing Friday wrong.
I used a few hours of vacation to leave work early. I'm not exactly sure how I fit in to the whole doing Friday correctly hierarchy.
I just put some beer and ice in the sink in the bathroom. No fridge upstairs? No problem. I've folded a grand total of three items though, so I'm not being very productive. How do four people generate so much laundry?
I guess it all depends on how fat your family is. I mean, if you're a "Larger" family, well...tents do take some time to fold, so it's all relative.
I've moved on from 90s music to Lucero and I'm almost done folding laundry. If you haven't seen these guys live, do yourself a favor and get to a show.
Most of the laundry comes from the two small children who live here. I don't understand how they have so many clothes.
Speaking of doing Friday right or wrong I just found out (after three days) that I am not in a dry county. I'm pretty sure that means I did about half of my week wrong though. Also, one of the guys I work with is sick so there is a chance I'll have to run up to Buffalo on my way back to Indiana from West Virginia. Shit.
I have three sisters. One of them is a complete raving lunatic. Called me after I proposed to my wife and yelled "what the fuck are you thinking?!?" Has completely disowned various members of the family at various points in time for petty reasons, has caused more shit than sugar free gummy bears, and at one point tried to stage an intervention to get me to a mental hospital in order to get back at me for calling her an asshole. So no surprise, her husband of seven years, father of three kids, a surgeon, cheated on her with a pharm rep. It was the scenario we had all joked about for years as how karma was gonna pay her back. To add insult to injury, the girl was a few shades past 21. And it was a relationship, not just a one time thing. He told her the whole spiel about I'm gonna divorce my wife to be with you. And when he got caught he apologized, said all the right things, then continued right back along his merry ways with the girl. So now they're getting divorced and the one who screamed "what the fuck are you thinking?!?" at me through the phone is gonna be single as I celebrate my 5th year anniversary. Am I wrong for thinking this was maybe her fault? Or at least mostly her fault?
Or maybe her plan? Do the math: ~Surgeon ~ 3 kids ~ He cheated ~ "I gave him the best years of my life! He abandoned his family for a 21 year old! I did nothing to deserve this. Think of the children." Next year at this time she's going to be sitting by her pool being fanned by oiled up pool boys, her ex-husband is going to be drinking a case of Old Milwaukee every night living in a studio apartment.
I imagine working at a hospital is a lot like scrubs but with way more fucking. So spaceX stuck a vertical landing. Did I miss the point on why vertical landings are so important to privatized space travel? Do they just want to replicate cheesy 50s tv's version of rocket landings? Couldn't they just parachute them back like the Russians do?
We called that years ago. They had two kids, we said she was gonna get him for one more then collect child support. They now have a litter of three. Though in fairness she makes really good money, has her own business. I believe she makes more than he does. For all of the two ladies on this board, if you've read a gossip magazine chances are good you've heard of her, or at least her company.
I haven't bought anything expensive and pointless in a while, so I bought a new knife. One of these: It's a Gerber Mark II. What the SEAL teams carried in Vietnam. It only has one practical purpose.....killing things. It's worthless at anything else, but it excels as a fuck you up seven ways from Sunday knife. Come at me bro.
Yes. Your sister is undoubtedly terrible person. But that doesn't justify cheating in my mind. If someone is a terrible person you divorce them.