That video was just a clusterfuck. I like the description that said it was filmed with a potato, cause it certainly looks it. Mom with the classic trailer gut sleeping in a filthy bed covered in laundry. Her daughter elegantly clad in an unzipped hoodie and bra. I think the most shocking thing to me was that the bf was 16. I would expect a 15-16 year old girl in that social situation to be dating a 19-20 year old Fleet Farm employee. The dialogue was so bad I almost thought it was staged cause it honestly sounded like the script to a "Mom bangs Stepdaughter's BF" porn"
The phone didn't work after being in the silica 24 hours, so I finally let my husband crack it open. This is his favorite thing in the world and I know he was annoyed I wouldn't let him do it sooner. It was dry as a bone inside but covered with white crap - which jibes with some of the stuff I'd researched, that water impurities are often the bigger culprit than the moisture itself. He is cleaning it and we'll see how it goes. I'm still not optimistic, but I've reached the acceptance stage of my grief.
Re: Be healed This is blasphemous. There's no way a middle easterner from Jesus' time didn't have chest hair. Or hair all over. They're still hairy bastards.
Don't skip leg day I feel like if the Good Shepherd was going to spend that much time in the gym, he probably waxed.
She only kept saying "friend" in the video, I never heard boyfriend. You are right about the age dating though, girls from trash only date creepy twenty somethings with a car.
My husband just called me from my phone. It works for the most part, but there are some glitches: 1) The battery won't charge through the phone. He said I will probably have to get one of those separate battery chargers. 2) The microphone doesn't work. He had to talk through a hands-free device in order for me to hear him. 3) The two buttons at the bottom for "settings" and "go back" don't work. He hasn't found anything else yet from playing around with it, so we'll see how it goes. I'm the type of person that will put up with stupid shit forever if it means I don't have to shell out more dough, so unless I hit a brick wall with something non-negotiable I will probably keep the phone and deal with it until I see a really good price on a refurbished one (it's a Samsung Galaxy 4s).
Because I know y'all are riveted to the edge of your seat regarding my phone situation, my husband thinks he knows what part of the cell phone is causing all 3 of the glitches and has ordered a replacement part. Meanwhile he has gone to get a battery charger to tide me over till the part gets in next week. Boggles my mind.
I pulled this over because it reminded me of a funny story. Years ago when Outback Steakhouse was really big, we met up with some friends and had a pretty long wait. We were in the lobby and they kept bringing food out and setting them on trays for people. We were wondering if because the wait was so long they were doing it to keep people happy since we didn't see any waitresses taking orders. My one friend wanders off and we notice her heading towards the food. We realize just as her hand is reaching towards the food that they are in fact orders that people place but we were too late to stop her. So she basically went up to these old couples' tray and ate their bloomin' onion, dipping it in their sauce and everything. The look on the couples' faces were hysterical. I went and rescued her since she had pretty much parked it there. She was so embarrassed to the point where I don't know if she's ever gone to another one ever. The people never said anything to her either. Just looked at each other like what is going on here? She would have ate the whole thing.
A third hand story that never fails to crack me up. A good family friend of ours got married in college and was broke. However, they decided as newlyweds that they could splurge and go to....KFC. So they go to KFC and chowdown on what little they could afford, but they are still pretty hungry. They are just sitting their talking and what not when the couple in the booth behind them gets up and disappears. They left a bucket of the good stuff on the table though. So the newlyweds are just sitting there talking and waiting and eyeing this bucket of chicken. A few minutes pass and in a carpe diem moment he seizes the bucket of chicken. They aren't ones to balk at a free meal even if that free meal comes second hand at KFC. They eat a bit. But then the couple behind them returns from the bathroom/car/Atlantis/Malaysian plane and they look at their table sans bucket, and then look at that them. They see the bucket and our family friend with a drumstick in his mouth. He nods and continues chewing. They shake their heads, cluck their tongues, and went to tell the story about the trashy couple at KFC who stole their food.
Perhaps there should be a grace period before stealing a bucket of plumber's caulk n' lard? "Trashy". That's a good way to describe it. The only way to make that story more believable would be to have it take place at Waffle House. Or maybe Houlihan's.
If my only experience at waffle house (or w-f-l h-s according to the dimly-lit sign) was any indication of future expectations, there's more than just a good chance of being stabbed in the throat with a broken coffee pot filled with e.coli over half a packet of sweet-n-low at any moment. Though, I did watch a pimp trying to sell blow over the phone blast a fist full of change at his bitches when it was time to go. Ft. Lauderdale, you spoiled me...
My favourite was Kentucky, where I was called a "faggot" for being Canadian. I had more fun at the Kissimmee one because it was great viewing: A Noah's Ark off-ramp for rejects of society. The waffles were decent (and the size of manhole covers) but I still prefer homemade. Is the company from Georgia? It has 3x the Waffle Houses that pretty much any other state has.
90% of those pictures speak to parts of me that I didn't know existed. If someone asks "What does a nice ass look like?" You send them to that blog. Those are real asses, handcrafted by an all religion team of Buddha, Vishnu, Shiva, Jesus, Allah, Mohammed, Brahma, Krishna, Zeus and God. I clicked that link at 7:01 pm. I scrolled, and I scrolled until my phone rang and it was 7:20pm. Dat ass.
Look, I appreciate the fact that my mom gave me two loaves of zucchini bread. But did she have to put blueberries in one and nuts in the other? I could barely wolf them down without thinking about how much I hate nuts in the bread. And there's a time and a place for blueberries, and zucchini bread isn't it. I really wish she'd think of me when she's making those huge batches for everyone. Geez. And I forgot how much I hate doing resumes and cover letters. Although technically not a cover letter (who does those?), I am sending an email with my resume and I don't just want to say "here". I feel like I need to include some sort of correspondence. I think I'm going to throw out a shoulder patting myself on the back so much about how awesome I am. Luckily she knows me and probably knows I'm blowing smoke up her ass. And I also have a hard time typing how organized I am when I have paperwork all over my bedroom in "I'll get to it" piles but since I still have 4 weeks, technically, I still have plenty of time. That's 28 whole days. Practically a month.
I have to ask them to practically burn the waffle so that it will be crispy. Nothing worse than a limp waffle (except maybe a limp dick). Same with the hash browns - I refuse to eat warmed up soggy shredded potato. That griddle you got there is supposed to fry shit, it's not a microwave. Their patty melts are the bomb yo.