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6/20/14 WDT NSFW

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by shegirl, Jun 20, 2014.

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  1. toddamus

    toddamus
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    She hates you for a reason, but like many women, she just hasn't told you yet.
     
    #241 toddamus, Jun 25, 2014
  2. BakedBean

    BakedBean
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    Disturbed

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    You should already know!
     
    #242 BakedBean, Jun 25, 2014
  3. Crown Royal

    Crown Royal
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    Just call me Topher

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    That's why females get angry at us. It's because we don't know the reason as to WHY they're pissed off at us for no reason. Those reasons include:

    1) treated them horribly in a dream they just had

    2) You forgot to put the toilet seat down and they're blind, have no hands, and have never lived indoors before.

    3) You forgot some mindlessly obscure "special day" like the anniversary of the first time she watched a hooker peg you in that old deserted hospital.
     
    #243 Crown Royal, Jun 25, 2014
  4. Danger Boy

    Danger Boy
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    #244 Danger Boy, Jun 25, 2014
  5. gamecocks

    gamecocks
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    The main problem with women's problems boils down to the fact that they don't want actual help with their issues. You ask a guy about a problem and he wants to fix it, women just want the support. Men are from Mars and what not. Easiest way is to just handle the support while thinking how to fix the problem.
     
    #245 gamecocks, Jun 25, 2014
  6. Juice

    Juice
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    #246 Juice, Jun 25, 2014
  7. BakedBean

    BakedBean
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    He was "already dead by the time responders arrived." No shit, really?

    I wonder what kind of injury it would take to have the EMTs go, "Ohhh, Jesus! Oh my GOD!!" and finish the poor bastard off with a shotgun.
     
    #247 BakedBean, Jun 25, 2014
  8. scotchcrotch

    scotchcrotch
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    So one of my friends was walking out of his doctor's office today after being diagnosed with Malaria and witnessed a woman getting run over and killed from a driver that had a seizure in his truck.


    Suddenly my bad day doesn't seem as bad.
     
    #248 scotchcrotch, Jun 25, 2014
  9. john_b

    john_b
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    How old is she? Here's my daughter with pink and purple in her hair. I think she was 9 at the time. It was the more permanent kind, where they turned it blonde then colored it.
     

    Attached Files:

    #249 john_b, Jun 25, 2014
  10. gamecocks

    gamecocks
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    Am I supposed to use corn or cilantro to accent that salsa. Asking for a friend.
     
    #250 gamecocks, Jun 25, 2014
  11. scootah

    scootah
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    Paramedics oopsy with opiates. Cops use shotguns, then they just sprinkle a little crack around and call it a drug bust.
     
    #251 scootah, Jun 25, 2014
  12. Luke 217

    Luke 217
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    My wife didn't speak to me for well over a month for motorboating a tranny at Churchill Downs a year or so ago.
    I knew what she was pissed about, I just didn't understand why.
    When she finally did want to talk about it, I told her that the tranny in question had grapefruits stuffed in her bra and she immediately thought that it wasn't as bad.

    What I don't understand is how that is any different? I didn't know they were grapefruits until I motorboated the tranny, for all I knew they were just fake sweater hams. Women justify the weirdest shit.
     
    #252 Luke 217, Jun 25, 2014
  13. xrayvision

    xrayvision
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    You can use both and it's fine. But I suggest some chopped poblano with a little garlic and lime for a nice touch.
     
    #253 xrayvision, Jun 25, 2014
  14. Bundy Bear

    Bundy Bear
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    Sounds like Tazzy Devil crossed with a fucking Velociraptor.
     
    #254 Bundy Bear, Jun 25, 2014
  15. Crown Royal

    Crown Royal
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    Just call me Topher

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    She's five. Really it doesn't bother me, she just wants it because she'll "look like a pop star."

    I will now sit back and await more jokes.
     
    #255 Crown Royal, Jun 25, 2014
  16. Rush-O-Matic

    Rush-O-Matic
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    grapefruit chipper

    The back and forth among the three topics - fruity blowjobs, hair dye in young girls, and wood chipper injuries - is messing with my brain trying to keep straight. I'm gonna have strange dreams tonight.
     
    #256 Rush-O-Matic, Jun 25, 2014
  17. bewildered

    bewildered
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    Re: grapefruit chipper

    Well actually, I did buy a grapefruit today...

    It is totally to make fruity iced tea, though.
     
    #257 bewildered, Jun 25, 2014
  18. xrayvision

    xrayvision
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    Hey guys. What do you think is happening to dixiebandit right now?
    [​IMG]
     
    #258 xrayvision, Jun 25, 2014
  19. toddamus

    toddamus
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    Re: grapefruit chipper

    Yea, sure, you're totally not considering carving a dick sized hole in it....
     
    #259 toddamus, Jun 25, 2014
  20. bewildered

    bewildered
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    Re: grapefruit chipper

    I would have had to have bought a watermelon instead.
     
    #260 bewildered, Jun 25, 2014
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