Fucking McDonalds. For years Egg McMuffins have been 2 for $3.33. Imagine my surprise when I walked in this morning, ordered 4, and was told it was $12 and some change. I looked at the person behind the counter dumbfounded and finally blurted out "Aw hell no" and walked out. I really wanted those McMuffins too. But not for 12 fucking dollars.
The last time I had a sausage McMuffin, I swear there was a tooth in it. Never again. Bacon McMuffin all the way. With a large coffee with milk. The perfect colon cleanse.
Welcome to the world of Canadian prices. You'll be one of us soon: wearing flip-flops in March, desperately calling every suicide hotline over the Leafs. ONE...OF...USSSSSS
For 7 bucks I go down to the taco joint. Get 3 tacos and a bucket of rice and beans. Homemade, cheaper than MCD, you don't have to shit your brains out. You get to... you get to. Topped out at 93 today. Just walking from my car into the store my back was dripping. You know it's hot when you feel heat escape the top of your scalp, like your body is evaporating. Fuck this shit. This guy playing last night, he had sweat moobs so bad. Who the fuck wears a silk shirt in June? Who the fuck wears a silk shirt? Fuckin' creep.
Good luck with that. What I actually ordered were 4 Sausage McMuffins with egg. I have no idea why I typed Egg McMuffin.
Aw yeah, sausage McMuffins. I love 'em. Too bad I gotta crawl into the fetal position for a bit afterwards out of shooting abdominal pain. Worth it!
Ugh. It was somewhere in the 113-117 range here today and I'll take that anytime over 90 in the south. At least I don't feel like I have to chew the air here.
Why, Divorced-Guy-With-A-Ponytail, THAT'S who wears one motherfucker. I think it's obvious you've never been to a dog park before. I wish somebody could have warned me about those places before I bought a dog. Yeeeesh, creep city.
McGriddles FTW. Who needs paper mache bread that dries your mouth out like eating a palm full of sand?
I've always liked the plain Ol' Egg McMuffin. I thinks it's one of McDonalds best creations, and actually it's one of the "healthiest" menu items.
Dunkin Donuts bacon, egg and cheese on an English Muffin for the win! Not bad for you either. Switch it to a croissant and that changes things. Also, their coffee is delish.
It is really easy to make a homemade Egg McMuffin. Seasoned ground pork, a scrambled egg and chives, toasted English muffin. None of these things are necessarily unhealthy. However, instead of Murkian cheese, I'd throw on the stinkiest sharp cheddar you can find. But that's my answer to everything. Bad day? Stinky cheese. Bad marriage? Stinky cheese. Smell like stinky cheese? More stinky cheese. 42 may be the answer to universal secrets, but stinky cheese and garlic are just as plausible. I make my own big macs all the time. The "secret sauce" is 3/4 cups ketchup and 1/2 cup of mayo. I toss a head of roasted garlic, teaspoon of dijon, and a splash of Worcestershire sauce in mine (stolen from a Mark Murphy recipe). Also did a McRib with beer braised pork belly. Pressed it over night so it became more patty-like, then crisped it in a pan and doused it in my chipotle bbq sauce, couple pickles and thin sliced red onion. Crack a beer, you've got yourself a shame party. Shit. Who wants to invest in this food truck? Park outside a gym and we'll make a fortune. "No, really, it's totally healthy guys. Well, healthier."
Today I celebrated returning home to Canada after a month away with a caesar at the first airport bar I could find. Because seriously, America, why the fuck wouldn't you add clam juice to your tomato-based cocktails?
My supervisor is from the land of Molson and swears by Caesar's. Because only drunk ass Canadians would pick up a clam and squeeze the juice into a bastardized version of a Bloody Mary. The fuck is wrong with you people?
Crap, for literally decades, every time I have to drive to Los Angeles (which is every three months) I would stop at the same McDonalds in Gorman California and order the Sausage McMuffin 2 for $3.33 special and an orange juice. Now Toytoy has destroyed my Southland travel life. Damnnit.
Wtf is clam juice? I love clams. But dumping the juice into something that's already perfectly delicious? It sounds as appealing as asking Blondie from the Clermont Lounge to queef into your beer for some "extra spice". No, thanks.