Re: Don't steal my identity So much confusion. Go with Netts focus. Clearly I made a mistake and should have posted my rant in the right thread so as to avoid the shitstorm it has caused in this thread. Carry on.
Re: Don't steal my identity I was going to say "stay on focus" but it's a WDT thread so there isn't one so carry on.
Um, not to be a downer here, but if I paid for a first class ticket, there is no way in hell I'm giving up that seat to anyone. Sometimes I don't understand how people think doing nice things for a specific group of people is somehow expected or is in some way praised at a higher level than if it was done for someone else.
Re: Don't steal my identity You know if I wasn't making an effort into not being an asshole I would have edited that post, The Wife just texted me saying that since I am about to be a father I have to clean up my act. That's a bunch of horse-shit if you ask me, which she didn't.
While we're on the topic of ptsd, I don't have it but have worked cases/rounds involving plenty of ptsd patients. I have also seen way too many people attempt to make jokes about ptsd or make light of someone by suggesting that they have it and have been asked s few times if i have it, not because I have shown any symptoms but because people just assume that you have ptsd if you've done certain things (I did some humanitarian work a few months ago and saw nothing traumatizing). Asking if I have ptsd so blithely is both offensive to those who suffer from it and unlikely to bring me any sort of help or consolation if I did. So everyone, the next time you see or hear someone making light of the disease or people who might have our, smack them in the head for me. Hard. Ptsd is not a disease exclusive to combat vets, nor does everyone who has ever served in the military necessarily have it (in fact the most common post deployment mental health problem is depression, and ptsd is on the whole rarer than you might think). Making light of it is kind of in the realm of making jokes about rape, but even less likely to be funny. If you know someone who you think needs help, reaching out to them is important (and you need to ask in direct terms, not vague "are you sure you're okay?" type questions which won't be answered honestly), but there's no space for "hey, how's it going? Haven't seen you in a while. Do you have ptsd from [shithole country]?" Just my two cents, while we're on the subject.
Re: Don't steal my identity Isn't it so cute when they say that? Like they really think you're gonna do it.
Re: Don't steal my identity What does "clean up your act" actually mean, besides being a complete insult? I always translated it as "You need to change but I'm fine the way I am."
I was back home for about 6 hours before the first person asked me if I had killed anyone when I was in Iraq. I also had people asking me if I was crazy or if I had flashbacks. My response was usually "Are you fucking retarded? Why would you ask me that?" Even when I was overseas I had an Air Force 2nd Lieutenant in the chow hall ask my buddy and I if we'd "seen any action yet" like he was asking us if we got laid or something. We then filled him in on how two days ago we lost three of our guys to some "action". He got real quiet after that.
I always assume that if you're talking to somebody who has seen a real horror that its not nice to play Twenty Questions about it. People should pick up on that sort of behaviour by being alive.
Re: Don't steal my identity Who knows what it means, all in all I really can't complain about my wife all that much, I guess I just lucked out. Some guys here at work complain so much and the stories they tell about the wives are just nuts, get a fucking divorce if it's that bad. Plus the few of the women I have actually met in person seem to be perfectly normal except for in the back of my mind I am just imagining them do all the horrible shit the husbands say they do.
So she was just saying Sarcastic Wife Shit. Got it. I also get horror stories about current wives. Fuck. It's nice to be in a decent marriage because there are some VERY unhappy married people out there. When couples are together, you only see the surface of their reality.
So long as it comes from a place of respect, I have NO PROBLEM talking about any aspect of what happened to me or about PTSD. In fact, I guess it's part of the "survivors guilt" thing, I take it as an opportunity to educate and inform those who are genuinely curious. It pains me to re-tell my story, but it pains me even more to know that there's this stereotype against people like me, so I have to do my best to make it normal. So, where I do have an issue, is when people ask me about what happened or about PTSD from a mocking or self-serving place. Like an "oh that sounds so cool, tell me all the gory details so I can go tell my friends something awesome!" For example: I had a priest give me my last rites (I'm not religious, but my family was). "Fortunately" I had enough time to discuss my own funeral plans with my family. I picked out everything from the songs they'd play (I'll post spoilered youtube of those songs if anyone is curious), to where I'd be buried (a family cemetery was being built on the ranch, and it was expedited for me), to cremation or casket, to the pictures I wanted on my casket. And yes, I really did request an "a party with kegs and people just having fun" instead of a recession or whatever the hell they normally do. I heard more people around me dying, making those groans and gurgles, than I care to count, though I probably could. I still hear those sounds when I go to sleep at night. Personally, emotionally, I prefer to talk about the happy old lady I met when in the hallways of the ward while I was re-learning how to walk, instead of how half her face was melted off from a fire, or how I heard some of her last sounds two nights later and how she died later that morning, and I had to hear her family sobbing their goodbyes as my family was sitting around me waiting to see if I'd survive or not. But talking about that part makes some of this PTSD stuff "human." It makes it real, like 'ok, so that's what they go through. Maybe PTSD isn't just the blood and guts you hear in the media. Maybe it is more emotional than that. Maybe these people who have it, aren't just action figures. Maybe they're like you and me.'
That is one of my only objections to hot weather: trying to sleep. If you're not in the A/C or under four fans it's hell. In the winter you just pile on the quilts and goodnight, Irene.
Oh it goes deeper. I'm talking full pajamas and covers and quilts. It was 85 here today and still around 74 right now. I cannot comprehend this. If it's above 62 in my apartment I start having a seizure.