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8/23/13 WDT RRRRRNSFW Whoa man.

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by shegirl, Aug 23, 2013.

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  1. The Village Idiot

    The Village Idiot
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    Porn Worthy, Bitches

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    Damnit, now I have to stay on here to await the next pure gold Angel post.

    Just watched Interview with a Hitman. Pretty good movie.
     
  2. bewildered

    bewildered
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    Deeply satisfied pooper

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  3. bewildered

    bewildered
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    Deeply satisfied pooper

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    My dog is a terrible guard dog. He has growled at my landlord and mother in law but when strangers like the two stoner North Shore surfer dudes who came to buy my busted TV? Licked to death.
     
  4. Crown Royal

    Crown Royal
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    Just call me Topher

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    My wife's grandmother has a pudgy beagle named Maggie. It's very friendly even though it's starting to look like a furry watermelon, however none of that matters. All that matters is that she was put on this planet to protect it from the most dangerous being ever known to mankind: my daughter, age four. Maggie absolutely, positively hates her for no provoked reason. Because my daughter takes up her great grandmother's attention during the one or two times a year we visit, this dog takes it VERY personally and constantly omits a low, malevolent growl whenever my daughter is within eyeshot. The closer she gets (being young she's virtually clueless to the dog's jealousy), the more teeth appear under Maggie's lips. The dog even snapped at her once, causing my wife's grandmother to go old school and tomahawk the dog on the beak with her tennis ball cane. Have you ever heard a beagle yelp in pain in a small house? They must be the loudest goddamn dogs on earth. This woman is British, 90, and starts every day with a pint glass of Screwdriver.
     
  5. Revengeofthenerds

    Revengeofthenerds
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    ER Frequent Flyer Platinum Member

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    Uhm... I don't think she's coming back.

    Though from the sounds of it at least one person will be cumming on her back.
     
  6. bewildered

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    He actually really loves kids and enjoys attention from anyone who will give it. I think Buddy's growls have been more of a nervous thing, because he settled down and got over it. Either that or he was picking up on my own nervousness. My mother in law feels to me like one of those unpredictable tom cats that are nice, rubbing up against your leg because they want food or attention, and then when you least expect it they lash out and bite you. She makes me very uncomfortable.

    I feel ya on the asshole dog thing. My sister's dog (I hate wire haired fox terriers. I would punt that fucking dog off a bridge if I could be certain no one would catch me) is the most ill tempered piece of shit I've ever had the displeasure to meet. My other sister's little girl was gently pecking all the relatives on the cheek before she went to bed on Christmas Eve and went to kiss the asshole on the head and got bit. Merry Christmas little girl! Here's a couple scabs on your face to remember your lovely holiday.
     
  7. katokoch

    katokoch
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    My lab loves little kids. Hell he loves everyone he sees. He would be the worst guard dog ever.
     
  8. toytoy88

    toytoy88
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    Alone in the dark, drooling on himself

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    Maybe your daughter is possessed. According to Ghost Hunters dogs are highly sensitive to that shit, they even have a Ghost Hunting dog. Science is awesome.
     
  9. toytoy88

    toytoy88
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    Alone in the dark, drooling on himself

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    My dad had a dog named Buddy. A fucking Cockapoo (Combination Cocker Spaniel/ Poodle.) Dad got him when he was 5 years old and that dog was an asshole. He fucking hated me. He'd bark constantly when I came over and try to bite me.

    After awhile Buddy came to like me and I set my plan in motion. Cockapoo's are high strung and neurotic to begin with, but I caused him to take it to a whole new level. He had his toys and I'd point at them and tell him "I'm going to get that." He'd flip his shit trying to protect his toys. I'd tell him "I'm going to get your food" and he'd run to his dish and growl.

    After a couple years of this he'd bite anyone who dared point at him.

    He actually pretty much became my dog, no one else knew how to deal with him. I miss that high strung little shit.
     
  10. bewildered

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    My Buddy's pretty freaking neurotic, more but like "basket case" than any kind of aggressive sort of thing. He cries to el husband the entire time I am gone, pouts when I'm getting my stuff together to leave, and sticks to my side all day. He really is my Buddy and is the best companion I could ever ask for but it really hurts him when I leave.

    Your Buddy sounds like good punting material.
     
  11. Crown Royal

    Crown Royal
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    Just call me Topher

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  12. Puffman

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    I just needed to get my 2 cents in. Drinking a cheap micobrew, watching high school football on Fox sports and wondering what it happening to my Oakland A's. Damn you Shimmered. Oh and of course I am waiting for the next Angel post.
     
  13. dixiebandit69

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    Li'l Bandit and I just got in from our final day at Schlitterbahn, New Braunfels.
    You know what I like most about this location (we have a pathetic little Schlitterbahn at South Padre Island)?
    The women at this location actually wear bikinis. Where I come from, the women will wear a bikini with a long-ass t-shirt over it, or wear shorts over the bottom, or both. Up here, they actually wear the damn bikini and nothing else.
     
  14. katokoch

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    Dixie, you should visit Lake Calhoun here in Minneapolis in the summer. Gorgeous women in bikinis everywhere.

    My girlfriend and I are headed to the State Fair tomorrow and then to a buddy's place on a lake for some grilling and fishing- if the dogs cooperate. I'm bringing my camera to the State Fair for the random sights and weird people.
     
  15. NatCH

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    You didn't happen to get caught up in a black market elephant smuggling operation ,did you?
     
  16. toytoy88

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    Alone in the dark, drooling on himself

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    Labia City huh?
     
  17. dixiebandit69

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    No, more like gluteal sulcus/ aka:butt crease city. And lots of wonderful midriffs.
     
  18. kuhjäger

    kuhjäger
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    Every bridal party has the bridesmaid who gets around, so if it isn't three, and you can't figure out which one it is, well I am sorry to say it is probably you...

    Ours was bridesmaid number two. She had fucked:

    The groom
    The bride
    The best man
    Groomsman #1

    and kissed groomsman #3 freshman year.
     
  19. ghettoastronaut

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    Champagne facials wins this thread.

    [​IMG]
     
  20. guernica

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    That mouth...
     
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