1 on 1 or 2 on 2? How is this even a challenge? How about I double down. I'll fight them both at the same time, if I win the sisters participate in a threesome with me. They don't look that attractive, but I just want to deflate the egos of these girls who think they're tougher and hotter than they are. When both of them have black eyes and broken jaws, and one's eating out the other while I get ready to blast a load all over their faces, I'll bet they'll have some regrets as to their audaciousness. EDIT: Even after adjusting for my E-Muscles... they're still tiny girls.
Ive been doing Ninjutsu since I was I was 14 years old. Yes, its heavily stereotyped as guys jumping around in the middle of the night and getting into shenanigans and throwing ninja stars (shurikens). A lot of those stereotypes are based on facts from Fuedal Japan, but present-day practice is very different. Its technical name today is Bujinkan Budo Taijutsu. Bunjinkan being the official organization/school headed by Haatsumi Sensei. That stuff and all the other technical information can easily be found easily on the internet in places like Wikipedia. The fighting style itself is very different than other styles, as it isnt so much a style as it is an entire philosophy. It focuses on 4 different attitudes (5 depending on who you ask) that are based on the elements, Earth, Fire, Wind, and Water. What does this mean? The best translation would be the "Fire" perspective would be one of agression, where as "Water" would be the opposite. With this, it focuses heavily on intention towards your opponent in coordination with deception. Its difficult to learn let alone teach or master. The difficult part is that most of the Americanized ninjutsu is bullshit and misses the point of the discipline competely. Im still very novice even though Ive been doing it for 10+ years. From what Ive read from Takamatsu sensei (early 1920s) is that since it relies on deception and manipulation, the true purpose is to never get to the point of combat at all, physical fighting should be a last resort.
I've seen this a number of times. I wrestled for 10 years (it qualifies, right?) and some of the girls that wrestled were damned tough. There were a couple in my area that rarely lost. I watched enough guys get their asses handed to them (even when they were completely serious and not smiling the entire time) to not misunderestimate the pair. That pair must be pretty damn tough... totally not worth the effort. Oh, wrestling? 3rd grade to my senior year of high school. I wasn't as good as you'd expect from someone who had been doing it that long, but I eventually gained some strength (wrestled 112/119 freshman year and 152/160 senior year) and confidence and could control a match. I found that it was much more of a mental sport than I believed in the past and eventually used it to my advantage. I don't really wrestle anymore... it used to be fun when I was drunk and friends (and myself) got cocky but I don't like waking up with random bruises and bumps on my head anymore. Wrestling in college was never a thought.
The only martial art I've ever really participated in was kind of a minimalistic, basic form of Krav Maga. Krav Maga for Dummies, if you will. Basically, while attending a military college, when you went to town on leave, you had to wear this silly uniform with a cape and pillbox hat like you'd see old-school bellhops wearing. A few of us enjoyed going to some live music venues that were a little seedy, kind of biker bars, and the combination of the dress and environment and booze led to more than a few incidents. More often than not, we'd come out on the losing end of the deal. That's when the Vice Commandant brought in a few infantry types to teach us some basic self-defense. It was kind of "don't fuck around, this is how you save your ass and run away" approach, and a lot of practising various situations. Never really got into any situations that needed it, but it boosted the confidence a bit. Now my best martial art is a self-deprecating sense of humour and not giving a shit what other people think.
I have no doubt that these chicks could kick my ass. However, the whole article sounds like this one (In case you're curious, the previous article was a hoax, but a hoax that was picked up by the British press and treated as a true story).
Personally, I wouldn't take them on. For one, I refuse to buy before I try and if all I know is how good they are in a scrap, I'm not interested. Second, these girls may be extremely badass and be able to kick my as ten shades of black and blue. People can disparage kung fu all they like, but if all you know is the crap you've seen through movies and media then you don't know much. I've seen female Sanda fighters from China go at it, and I would not like to be on the receiving end of things. Plus, if these girls are from anywhere in the north and know Mongolian Wrestling most people are fucked if they choose empty hand. (Yes, I know it says the fight is in Foushan in the south east, but that's probably the most famous province in China for martial arts). Although, it would be awesome to have a wife that I could greet every morning with, "you remember that time I kicked your ass?".
What about Heart? What belt do you need to get before you can wield a magic ring? And where does Captain Planet fit into all of this? I took some Shotokan classes in 6th grade, but got bored with it after a few months. Most of my fighting skill comes from growing up with a younger brother who was bigger than me. There were a few times where it got pretty bloody. I've found out that 99% of the time I can talk my way out of a fight anyway.
First I'll take on the easy one, to Shennanigans: I said 150 with a .243. I'd happily do it with a more powerful rifle, but the recoil would be so bad for them it'd give me an unfair advantage. But I grew up with a .243 I'm extremely confident with it. No way in hell at 150 yards they could get me before I'd get them. Just, no. I'm also thinking maybe that they've never shot one before, which would give me an unfair advantage. And as for demolition derbies, their tendency to run into things would only play to my advantage. I'll be putting their engine in my sights, while they're running into things, like the wall, other cars, obstacles, etc. And like all men everywhere, I know how to properly counter-steer, remain in relative control while in a slide, understand which parts of a car are most vulnerable, and can avoid other vehicles when under attack by a lesser opponent. They, by nature of being women, and especially chinese women, obviously don't.
I wrestled in junior high and high school (8 years total) and have trained muay thai (4 years and earned my black shorts) and Bjj (4 years and a blue belt). The hardest mentally were wrestling (cutting weight) and muay thai (take punishment to deal out punishment). It took about a year and a half to condition my shins in muay thai and bags of concrete still give me the chills. My trainer (a 2 time Lumpinee champion) said that since we lacked banana trees, we would kick 50 lb bags of concrete tied to the gym's support beams instead. After technique and sparring ended, we would have 50 kicks on each leg on the concrete bags before anyone could stretch and go home. My first night, I was nearly in tears after about 15 kicks on my right leg but managed to finish out the sets and collapse on the mat. It got a lot easier as my shins hardened, but never again. I'm now extremely susceptible to shin splints and if you run you hand down them, they feel like an alligator's back from all of the calcium deposits and minor breaks. I wrestled for a top 10 class A team in Illinois and my coach was a two time All-American at Iowa State. He was the friendliest guy you'll ever meet off the mats but in training he could have given the Spanish Inquisition a run for their money in creative torture techniques. I fondly remember a practice session where he was pissed at the previous night's match result. He calmly walked in, told the 103-130 lb guys to grab a partner and 25 lb plates, the 135-160 lb guys to grab 35's and the 171+ guys to grab 45's. We ran the bleachers at Illinois State's Redbird Arena for 30 minutes. The first guy out of the two would grab the weight and run up the bleachers pressing it over his head every two steps on the way up and off his chest on the way down. The second guy would run suicides on the basketball floor and had to complete two down-and-backs before the first guy finished. Everyone, and I mean everyone, puked at some point and one guy had a mental breakdown about 20 minutes in. Never again. What was the previous night's result you might ask? We won 54-12 over the #12 team in the state. But we gave up two pins. Coach didn't like pins. Alt Focus: MMA (the UFC in particular) is starting to become extremely wrestling emphasized. A good collegiate wrestler with basic submission defense and decent stand up can hang with the best from around the world. The Bjj techniques aren't baffling anyone anymore and wrestlers have the easiest time adjusting to basic submissions and defense. If anyone watched the last UFC fights, they were a perfect example. The Brits don't have a wrestling background and suffered for it. Chael Sonnen in UFC 117 also illustrated the first point. He ravaged Anderson Silva (widely considered one of the nastiest strikers in MMA history and a BJJ black belt) for five rounds. Despite the hail mary submission at the end by Anderson, I think it started to illustrate a changing of the guard in MMA technique.
Except Chael! Ohhh! (and let's be fair, it wasn't a hail-mary submission. A good Blue could sub Chael, and Anderson had broken ribs before the fight) Just to elaborate on Wrestling. I've been training MMA, BJJ and Muay Thai for 2 years now, fought twice. There's nothing worse than grappling against an excellent wrestler. Because they feel damn near impossible to move/sweep. Their base is second-to-none, and it gives you an appreciation for guys fighting against superior wrestlers in MMA. It sucks. Right now I want to train my Boxing and Wrestling for a while, because they're the weakest part of my skill-set. Australia has a pretty decent Boxing scene (our Muay Thai scene is world-class) but we don't have collegiate or high-school wrestling programs. Which sucks.
Without derailing this into hail mary or no- It still took Anderson 4 1/2 rounds to pull of his magic. Right now in the heavyweight division you have Brock Lesnar and Cain Velasquez, two very successful Division I wrestlers that made the jump to MMA. Phil Davis (a former All American Penn St. wrestler) is set to become the next sliced bread, and Georges St. Pierre is still grinding his way through the cream of the welterweight crop.
I was never a martial artist, but I've always respected the talent and discipline that goes into almost any martial art. However, I hate the ones that use bullshit mysticism that any idiot can see through. Take Kiai, the Mormons of martial arts. Why didn't the old asshole in the video below just use his chi to fly to the ceiling and rain down magical music dragons on his opponent? Did he honestly believe his yelling would stop an expert at bone-on-bone contact? I wonder if his cosmic powers will repair that broken face:
So, is it wrong that the idea of having 2 asian women beat the crap out of me is a bit intriguing? And I'd never have a chance at beating them anyway, as my one an only sure-fire move has been rendered useless.
Wrestling is very good for MMA, with extension/alteration (that means adding strikes, submissions and other things that may be missing). It's not everything, but it's a good basis. They're not unbeatable though. We don't have wrestling available at a school/college level in any discernible form, as pointed out. If we did, I've have been all over it. One of my guys is an ex-collegiate wrestler who went to an American school in the Philippines. I'm not claiming he's top notch, but he's had a lot more experience and grounding in it than I have. We've only gone against each other once in tournament, and I choked him out. That's because he doesn't have the grounding in what to do what to do to finish a fight. That's the essence of MMA, take what you have and add what you need. Don't forget that things like UFC are a sport. They have rules, and those rules are going to mean someone gets favoured. I'm not arguing against the rules, because they're there for valid reasons. In a streetfight, if I had to, those rules are gone. Also, if a guy is walked down the street wearing a pair of trunks and nothing else, I'm not messing with him. It's not the real world, and it's not a "real" fight. It's close, but it's not exact. To be honest, as well, I've seen very few impressive strikers in these comps from a technical standpoint. What I have seen is very, very good grapplers and wrestlers. It all adds up. Chumps like this give martial arts a bad name. Nerve strikes and hits work. Claiming you can do them from across the room with the power of suggestion is just begging to get your ass kicked, as evidenced. Change it to "Monkey tears down the beef curtains" and it will work. Not as effective, but it will get their attention.
I've wrestled since Grade 9 (fresstle or Grco-Roman), but much less after high school. It's not in any way a martial art, but none the less a great defensive training. Like Judo and Aikido it's all about countering, leverage and using your opponent's weight to your own adavantage. I've always loved it and suffered through many-a-gay jokes for it.
This has everything to do with the rules of MMA changing, and PRIDE no longer being around, and nothing to do with some evolution in fighting ability. Without the ability to kick or knee a "downed" opponent as one could in PRIDE, or the ability to punch or elbow the back of the head, like the early SEG days of the UFC, the wrestler becomes completely unstoppable. Basically, all he has to do is shoot takedowns again and again. If he gets stuffed, then just stall against the cage, wait to be separated, or pushed off, and then try again. It's an unbeatable strategy, especially since he can latch onto the hips or legs, put a knee on the ground, and the opponent can't do a damn thing to defend. This is why every top MMA guy has to be an elite grappler nowadays. Only then can they even begin to use their advantage in the stand-up. Chael Sonnen is a great fighter who has improved his game vastly and even showed solid boxing against Silva, but dude, it would be a different fight with blows to the back of head, or even the PRIDE ruleset. Chael himself would approach the match very differently. I've seen female wrestlers too, but you're really mis-characterizing their abilities. First of all, these girls invariably compete at the lowest weights, from 103 to 119 (rare) pounds. Secondly, they do so in high school, usually in the first few years, around the age of 14, when the physical strength difference between guys and girls is nowhere near as vast as it becomes by the age of 22. Also, let's not forget that these girls are among the strongest in their gender, and can barely hold their own against some weak, skinny guy in the matches I have seen. And it doesn't even have an application to this situation, since these Chinese girls are versed in kung fu, not grappling. Focus- I did TKD and karate when I was a kid for several years, then amateur boxing for two years in high school, and have done BJJ (albeit very lazily) for the past couple of years. Physically, I'm weaker than most guys my age that train seriously in a combat sport, although I have insanely long limbs (and I'm 6' 5") and have fast hands. Technically, I can do some things well, and am completely useless at others. Overall, I'm a filthy amateur. Alt Focus, Part 2- I have to admit; I would find it the height of amusing if some violent Chinese psycho entered the "fighting tournament" with the sole intention of hurting those two frail female midgets, took them on at the same time, and rewarded them with broken bones and concussions. (In fact, this reminds me of the plot to a number of Asian films...except without the rape) On a more serious note, no one is that much of a badass fighter these days. Fedor Emelianenko can be stopped cold by a teenager with a small caliber handgun. A tough, dedicated female who has spent her entire life practicing real martial arts for hand-to-hand combat, and not some kung fu crap would STILL get mauled by a guy who just happens to be twice her size, uses 40% of his muscles instead of her 35%, has naturally superior agility and speed, and can repeat techniques faster, easier, and more correctly. And there's nothing more amusing than people living in a fantasy world being doused with cold, sobering reality. (Although, once again, I think it's just a pathetic publicity stunt)
This is because Martial Arts in general has gotten dumbed down over the years. There are so many bullshit fighting styles now, a lot of people have no idea what one they're doing. The funniest one is Capoeira. If someone says they practice Capoeira, then they've never been in a real fight because they'll get their ass kicked. Also a lot of people go the MMA route instead of traditional martial arts. That's fine; personally I love MMA, but traditional styles fall by the wayside.
What?? Are you claiming there is some mystical style through which its practitioners can defeat someone with a FUCKING GUN? How do you intend to do that? Shoot chi energy balls at them? It's incredible the fantasy world some people live in.
No, that's not what I meant. I'm talking about the fighters no longer being the badasses they used to be. I never mentioned guns anywhere in my post. I just got lazy when narrowing down the quote. Why are you bringing up firearms in a discussion about fighting anyway? So you can state the obvious?
Have you ever actually come across someone that claims Capoeira is self-defense besides Eddie from Tekken? Also, I don't see your point in regards to MMA. Are you saying an MMA fighter is a dumbed down version of a black belt in Taekwando? I'll tell you what, put any MMA fighter against a 5th degree black belt and see what happens. . MMA may not teach parables and give out fancy belts, but the hybrid sport will clean the floor with that point bullshit.