My wife and I adopted an African American boy this past week and have felt a little bit of friction among old family friends. The birth mother has also felt a little criticism for adopting to a white couple. A few friends even offered to adopt the child. Is it in the best interest of a child to be adopted within its own race?
Dude... seriously? Asking TiB for advice on this? That should disqualify you from parenthood of any sort right there. But really, don't go down that road. Fuck your "friends", fuck the birth mother, and only give a shit about providing a loving and nurturing environment for your new kid. That is ALL that matters, and nobody else is anywhere near "qualified" to say otherwise. Parenthood is hard enough as it is, don't let that petty shit cause any additional problems. If anyone gives you grief, tell them to shut the fuck up and cut them out of your life. They don't matter. Only your SON does.
Dude, you and your wife just did a wonderful thing. If your friends want to be like that, then seriously, fuck them. Is the kid going to experience some friction being raised by a white family? Maybe. But are you and your wife going to provide better for this child than it's birth parents could have? Are you prepared to be parents? Will you do all you can for this kid? If so, then then the benefit far outweighs the negative. Lastly, if you hold with the idea that a child should be raised within it's own race, you're tacitly agreeing with segregation. Maybe a bit of a stretch, but if you really believe that everyone is equal then it shouldn't matter what color your skin is or what color your kid's skin is.
I like where your hearts are but saying "fuck it, I don't care if every single person in this child's life hates him, it doesn't matter as long as he has his parents' love" is extremely self serving. Like it or not, raising a black child in a racist white town can seriously alter their development in a negative way (my adopted cousins found this out the hard way). As for the actual question, it's hard to gauge how heavy the friction is without you going over actual conversations you have had, but you're in Atlanta, right? I haven't spent a lot of time there, but from what I understand it's a fairly heterogeneous city, so I don't see any issues in your specific case.
I would honestly probably never speak again to any of my friends or relatives who tried to argue that a caucasian family adopting a negroid child was 'wrong' without more context. Fuck that noise and fuck those people. But the local environment where you're raising the kid makes a big fucking difference. I don't know Atlanta well enough to know the local politics - but if you're in an area with racial tensions, a black kid who doesn't have any association with the local black community because his parents are crackers, could well have some pretty nasty issues. Talk about being stuck on the boundaries. If you think that ethnic divisions where you live aren't going to be an issue, I don't see any problem. If you do see ethnic divisions as being a problem - I still don't see any problem with the adoption - I do see a case for you to consider moving somewhere else to raise your kid. Also - Anyone? I've read just enough to think that I have a handle on this topic - but no practical experience and don't want to waste money on crap through misunderstanding. Specifically, I'm looking into using it as an antibacterial treatment for leather and suede products. I know you can buy huge and stupidly expensive units for cleaning up after entire baseball teams - but I think if I can find a 2g/h output generator and come up with some kind of roughly sealed space so that the output dissipates at a reasonable speed and not just immediately, I can just do the same thing in my garage. Am I being an idiot and missing something or is that entirely reasonable? Also, my understanding is that on a standard 10 amp domestic circuit, getting 2 grams per hour of output is reasonable and achievable from standard ambient atmosphere input - and that if I run it off tanked oxygen, I'll get about 5 times that output. But one of the vendors I'm talking to is talking about 10 grams per hour for a price point that's comparable to the other vendors I talked too who's units are rated for 2 grams per hour. Should I just assume that he's rated his unit using tanked oxygen, or is it actually possible?
My two youngest children are adopted from Korea and we were concerned how some of our old school Italian relatives were going to handle it. My wife and I decided to rise above any questions or criticisms and quite frankly not acknowledge them. What we ended up with is two beautiful children that are widely accepted by the entire family. We do continue to face racist questions by strangers all the time - it is amazing how bold people in a grocery store can be! Again - rise above it and be proud of what you are doing. You have given this child a better opportunity in life - give him the love an nurturing that you would of any child and it will pay back in spades! Good Luck and Godspeed.
Looking for some quick assistance on an "extra credit" question that will increase the grade on my Microeconomics exam from a B to an A. It should take no more than five minutes, I've done half of it but want to be sure on the rest. It involves budget constraints and drawing indifference curves based on the price of two goods and consumer preferences and finally, sketching a demand curve based on the indifference curve points. I can do everything with 100% certainty except for the drawing of the indifference curves. I have a scan of the assignment to send to anyone that wishes to help me. It's due Wednesday morning.
Is it ironic or funny that it WAS done with a program called Gimp? *edit* except that I'm too stupid to know how to actually use the program correctly.
If the child receives the love and nurturing that he needs to thrive, then he's ahead of 95% of the world's population. Certainly, there will be instances in life where both you and he receive friction as a result of your differences. The results lie largely with your reaction to this friction. If you and your wife can find ways to react with grace and humor, that will go a long way toward teaching your child to do the same. Life goes much easier for a "different" kid who can laugh at his situation rather than insisting on fighting back at every chance. Having some frank discussions with your wife now about how to react appropriately when these situations arise will make life infinitely easier for your son moving forward.
So for spring break we're thinking of going to Penasco Del Sol Hotel in Rocky Point. Anyone have any feedback on it?
Does anyone know of any good, cheap sites/places to order glassware from? I'm planning my fraternity's formal, and each year we give out some kind of glassware - last year I did old fashioned glasses, in the past we've done shot glasses, pilsner glasses, etc. Cost is the big thing here. Money's pretty tight this year, but I don't want to cut them out. We usually get 75-125 glasses. Any suggestions? Thanks guys
I'm flying into LaGuardia tonight, and spending the weekend in NYC. My hotel is in Times Square. My question is- is there a better way than taking a taxi cab to get from the airport to the hotel? (and from hotel to airport on Sunday) I'm not confident enough to navigate the subway by myself at night (I know, Im a pussy). How much will a cab cost? Thanks for any advice.