Re: CHRISTMAS DRUNK THREAD 2009 I don't know about you guys, but what I didn't receive for Christmas is what I'm most disturbed about. Spoiler http://www.bulletexpress.com/?gclid=CLzajfDq9J4CFQjyDAoddhBIOQ I put it in spoilers because god forbid you see it unless you're completely prepared for the rape your brain is about to receive. THE BULLET EXPRESS. I just saw a commercial for it, and apparently you can make a New York style cheesecake in less than 45 seconds. Also, you can make some type of strange looking beef casserole in the same amount of time. Then there was a bunch of other shit they showed that didn't seem like it was possible that it came out of a stupid fucking machine that just blends shit up and spits it out a chute but apparently IT'S GREAT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! GET YOUR VISA AND AMEXS READY, CUZ THESE THINGS ARE SELLING LIKE DEAD BABIES!!!!!!
Re: CHRISTMAS DRUNK THREAD 2009 I've been productive as shit today. I woke up at 7 a.m. to drive my mom to the train station and I've been at it ever since. Did laundry, returned gifts, got some work done via e-mail, solidified New Year's Eve plans and ran for 30 minutes. Time to crack a beer (or 12) and watch my hometown's bowl game (Meineke Car Care Bowl, Pittsburgh vs. UNC) on TV. I get all nostalgic whenever I see the Charlotte skyline. Need to visit soon, it's been nearly two years.
Re: CHRISTMAS DRUNK THREAD 2009 I was debating on whether or not to drink tonight. Then I realized the true debate is not if I should or should not. It's which bottle should I start with. And the winner, as usual, is whiskey.
Re: CHRISTMAS DRUNK THREAD 2009 Brother is arriving from Canada. There shall be drinking. Whoa Gregg is that you? Edit: Wait, I don't have a dog. Carry on.
Re: CHRISTMAS DRUNK THREAD 2009 I spent Christmas at my parents' house. I am an only child. My stepdad doesn't drink, and while my mom drinks wine, she's one of those one-or-two-glasses-a-day people. My parents now live in a city seven hours from where I went to high school and nine hours from where I went to college. I've been able to drink the past few days, but I couldn't achieve anything more than a minor buzz under their judgmental gaze. They're out of town for the night, and hallelujah, I'm finally drunk. Anybody else chugging beers like a freshman or am I the only alcoholic fuck getting his fix the day after Christmas?
Re: CHRISTMAS DRUNK THREAD 2009 Sounds kinda like my family. Dad quit drinking when I was in 6th grade. I'm disappointed that I never had a chance to get drunk with him, since, by all accounts, he was one of the greatest partiers that has ever walked the earth. Mom will drink occasionally (She just recently discovered Captain Morgan and apparently loves it) but gets pretty loopy after 3 beers and is totally worthless after 4. I've been pent up in a blizzard the last 2 nights with them and once we're done eating supper I'm gonna walk the 75 feet from my parent's house to the bar and belly up for the night with some good friends. Then, assuming the interstate will be open and in good driving condition, I'll head back home and shovel the 2 feet of snow out of my driveway. woohoo
Re: CHRISTMAS DRUNK THREAD 2009 As a UF fan, the news about Urban Meyer has just accelerated my drinking exponentially.
Re: CHRISTMAS DRUNK THREAD 2009 Fuck YES get to it. That's like telling your kid you're taking him to McDonald's and then you pull into the parking lot for Sunday school.
Re: CHRISTMAS DRUNK THREAD 2009 Oh, you know, the usual awkward silence that tends to follow a drunken night full of foolish decisions.
Re: CHRISTMAS DRUNK THREAD 2009 I'll tell you what you didn't miss: Breakylegg being a contributing member of TiB.
Re: CHRISTMAS DRUNK THREAD 2009 You're lucky if you only have awkward silence to deal with after most drunken nights of foolish decisions. Do you know how hard it is to dig a grave in this frozen ground during a blizzard? Even if you only have half a hooker to bury, it's still quite an undertaking.
Re: CHRISTMAS DRUNK THREAD 2009 Lye or barrels of acid. If you are a chubby chaser, you may have to do a bit more chopping up to make it fit.
Re: CHRISTMAS DRUNK THREAD 2009 You misunderstood. Yes, lye and acid will destroy the body, but you need another option if you're just storing it for later. Women age like fine wine.
Re: CHRISTMAS DRUNK THREAD 2009 Have you considered a deep freezer, disguised in a barn or something of the like? Hmmm, how many times can you microwave a corpse and still be able to fuck it? Do you use cooking oil? For lube?
Re: CHRISTMAS DRUNK THREAD 2009 God, I'll never forget the first time I had sex wearing a nose plug. Magic.
Re: CHRISTMAS DRUNK THREAD 2009 [/quote] A blowtorch up the vag for a few seconds does the trick. No need to warm up the parts you ain't gonna use.
Re: CHRISTMAS DRUNK THREAD 2009 Do you bleach away the pieces of her flesh that adhere to you? Or chew on them?
Re: CHRISTMAS DRUNK THREAD 2009 A blowtorch up the vag for a few seconds does the trick. No need to warm up the parts you ain't gonna use.[/quote] You like crispy crotch?