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Covert Assholes

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by downndirty, May 12, 2012.

  1. PIMPTRESS

    PIMPTRESS
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    Emotionally Jaded

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    John Elway is a drunk, arrogant fuck. I met him at a bar here in Denver over a decade ago, with a friend that is a rabid Broncos fan. We were all ready to go clubbing, we were all cute and giddy and she wanted his autograph so very bad. We walk up to him, she blurts out that she's a fan, and he rolled his eyes and asked what she was "willing to do for it." She is shocked, doesn't know what to say and flushes crimson. I state that we would keep cheering for our home team and I maybe would go to his dealership to buy my next car. He rolls his eyes and says "Next."

    Never one to be insulted in my youth I replied "If you were Troy Aikman I'd have fucked you, but then he's got talent." I realize this statement is easily challenged and debated, but it seemed to have the desired effect. He was shrieking some statistics when we walked away. I was laughing, but the entire exchange made my friend cry.

    Therefore, fuck John Elway. It would've been easy to sign a goddamn napkin and move on.
     
  2. lostalldoubt86

    lostalldoubt86
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    My 11th grade Am. History teacher is still fully aware that teenage girls think he's hot and is apparently under the impression that it is something to base his personality around. I used to hang around after class because I was having trouble in his class. To see all those teenage girls swooning over him and giving me the stink eye because I was talking to him was hysterical. My cousin works with him now, and she told me he bases his self-esteem around the fact that teenage girls swoon.
     
  3. Crown Royal

    Crown Royal
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    Just call me Topher

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    He's a twat in real life, I don't give a shit about his acting style.

    Focus: Travis Meeks. This guy, what an incredible musical talent and has true original vision, but he' a complete asshole (thanks in part to meth). From the beginning, he treats every interview with utter contempt, fires bandmates without provocation, and when he was the original choice for lead singer of Velvet Revolver (before Weiland) he demanded total creative control of the music! Because we all know Duff, Slash, and Matt Sorum have no issues with singers stealing the credit for a band or anythin, right?.

    Maybe he's different now that he's clean. I hope so, because he was born to make music.
     
  4. gtg2k

    gtg2k
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    Everyone out there, no matter how saintly their image, has someone that thinks they are an asshole and/or cunt. For example, Susan G. Komen: Yes, she died of a terrible disease; yes, her foundation is doing "good things"; yes, they put out such "an inspirational message". Having said that, I guarantee there are multiple people that think she's a cunt. Guarantee it.

    Focus

    George Washington

    The "Father of Our Country" was a money/power/status hungry spendthrift. He was a probable adulterer and extremely vain; cared more about his image and obtaining titles than serving his country; married Martha Custis pretty much for her land and money; and was, according to the writings of his stepson, a real dick (though to be fair, the stepson was a bit of a worthless douche). Most of this can be found in Ron Chernow's epic biography Washington: A Life

    Billy Graham

    Absentee and emotionally abusive father; anti-Semite; asshole for making his poor wife linger in pain for months before her death; was wishy-washy on segregation because he didn't want to alienate his audience (not the only one guilty of it in the 50's, I know); homophobe.

    Martin Luther King (and his family)

    Serial philanderer; plagiarized a significant portion of his dissertation; his children have commercialized his legacy for their immense profit; he left many of his constituents out to dry on daily matters; as far as Memphis goes, he saw the sanitation workers strike as a way to further his own agenda, paving the way for such assholes like Jesse Jackson and Al Sharpton.

    Tim Tebow

    I work at a golf course that hosts a PGA tour event, and Tebow played one of the pro-ams last year. A real jerk to the service staff. Rude to security and the tournament organizers. In fact, anyone that's a jerk to service staff in any field, especially for no reason, is a real asshole. Plus, he knows what he's doing with this media hype. He's not this "gracious, Godly man" seen on TV. Mark my words: His fall, when it comes, will be epic.

    Also, for wrestling fans:

    Owen Hart

    Never apologized to "Stone Cold" Steve Austin for legitimately breaking his neck in an accident. This injury was the catalyst that ended Austin's career, and has left him with severe, crippling neck pain. Would take advantage of fans' generosity and use them for anything & everything. One of these fans had to pay thousands of dollars in auto repair bills when Owen pulled the guy's emergency brake while the guy was doing 70 on the highway.
     
  5. Allord

    Allord
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    Disturbed

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    That's not even the best reason why Edison was a douche, ever wonder how he came to invent such an inhuman number of inventions in one lifetime? He didn't invent them, he had a team of skilled inventors do the work for him while he paid them factory wages and took all the credit.

    Focus: God.

    Now I know we're not supposed to bring religion into this, but I'm treading the fine line of saying that I'm not speaking about religion itself, just a convergent concept that just happens to be held by many of them.

    Every religion I've ever heard of that includes God(s) inevitably includes some acts by the God(s) being incredibly douchey for any and all reasons. Maybe that's why Buddhists are all so relaxed, the douchiest thing the object of their worship ever did was sit under a tree for so long that he inevitably caused whatever grass he happened to be sitting on to wilt and die. Buddha never attempted to drown the entire world or threatened the wilting of the harvest if not sated with still-beating hearts, he was just a chill dude who happened to eat more rice than he should have without getting the requisite amount of necessary physical exercise. Hell, Buddha sounds like he'd make a great Hawaiian.
     
  6. BL1Y

    BL1Y
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    NASA.

    They got fucking giddy when the Space X Dragon capsule had a launch delay. They basically hate everyone else in the world who does space flight, and especially hate it when private American companies are doing it.

    Plus, they kill a lot of astronauts. That's not cool.
     
  7. Omegaham

    Omegaham
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    "We're mediocre at space flight, and Goddamn it if we aren't proud of it."
     
  8. FreeCorps

    FreeCorps
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    #1 Internet Boo

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    #28 FreeCorps, May 27, 2012
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 27, 2015
  9. mav_ian

    mav_ian
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    Blah blah blah