Dont sweat it. It's tough to type with 1 hand and no blood flowing north of your nipples. We've all been there.
So I don't have a definitive answer to the question "how many drinks does it take to get me drunk?" but I know that it's less than I've had so far today. Progress.
Last night I was able to make progress on the question "how many drinks does it take for me to fall asleep in a chair while a frozen pizza cooks in the oven?" I woke up about two hours later to the whole house smelling of burnt pizza... Doh...
I think it'd be this reason for why Maccas don't do delivery in Australia yet. Imagine coming home ater 20 beers. You search through the fridge/cupboards etc and there's nothing to eat. You're too lazy/drunk to cook. You eat some grated cheese but that doesn't really do it for you. So you call Maccas, order 2 large triples cheeseburger meals and 20 nuggets (because your ability to eat large amounts of food is always misjudged when you're drunk), put on the TV and wait. Next thing you know you wake up 3 hours later, and some poor delivery guy has thrown it all over your car and/or house.
Did anyone else like 'Sucker Punch?' I really liked the first fantasy scene with that Samurai thing. Pretty awesome.
Farm adventure: So I've decided to be a bit more "why not" in my actions. Today I decided to randomly leap the fence and walk down to where the cows graze at night. Turns out cows can be dicks (I know many of you know this, but I'm a city boy), I just wanted to chill but one of them was all up in my shit and trying to bull rush me out. I kind of kicked her ass, but she wouldn't back down and kept bucking like crazy. Mind you she's more than double my size and could trample my dumb ass to death on a whim. Eventually I got bored of hanging out and wanted to go back in, she took this as a sign of submission and the whole way back decided to buck me so hard I was lifted off my feet several times. She was like the ghosts in Mario 3, she fucked my shit up when I wasn't looking but froze when I was back in the power seat. Fuck that bitch.
I didn't think "The Dictator" was as good as Ali G/Borat/Bruno, but the opening scene with the Kim Jong reference was hilarious. As was the masturbating scene, which is funnier than the one in "Due Date" which I didn't think could be beaten.
I wish I was home watching Empire Records rather than being where I am right now. Which is the saddest birthday party ever. Ugh. There isn't enough alcohol in the world to save this sinking ship.
I disagree. I find that after about 5 whiskey and cokes, everything is great. You should try this method.
I was at a first birthday party last weekend and there was a pinata, but the kids didn't beat it. It had a bunch of strings for the kids to pull, one at a time, and when they pulled the right one the bottom came out, spilling the candy. If it's one of those pinatas it could very well be a shitty party.