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Fuck it, the Drunk Thread

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Nettdata, Jun 23, 2011.

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  1. Blue Dog

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    No, I don't think I ever posted it here... Mostly 'cause I don't remember much about meeting her. Ha!
    Spoilered for those who don't care:
    Shes an American citizen (Dad was American, but had family in Spain, Mexico, Honduras, and US), but was raised in Cuernavaca, Mexico and Honduras. She came to the US for college not knowing a word of English, and was taught American culture by her family here, who are all a bunch of Italians (Yay Diversity!). We actually met while we were both walking (or in my case- stumbling) home from the bar on night- I was going to my house, and she was walking with some of her friends to an apartment close by (coincidentally, the same apartment where I fell from the balcony). I was wearing a Southern Tide polo, which caught their eyes. The conversation went like this (as told by her friend, as I don't really remember this):

    Friend: HEY TALL BOY! WE LIKE YOUR SHIRT!
    Me: (Stumbling over to them)............ HEY! Doo yall like beerses? I have beerses! At MY HOUSE! Les' go DRINK 'EM!
    The Wife: (Just as drunk as I am) Ahahahaha! He eess adorable!

    The didn't come over, and I don't know how it happened, but somehow we exchanged numbers, and the next morning I had a text from her. I honestly had NO idea who it was from, and didn't recognize the name. But when I got up and made myself a white russian for breakfast (good hangover cure, by the way, and an excellent buffer to help transition from "feel-like-shit" mode to "drink-all-day" mode) because I was going tubing down the river with some buddies that day, I replied back to her asking if she wanted to go. You know, because even though I didn't know her... Why not? I must have liked something about her if I gave her my number. She declined, but asked me to meet her later that evening for drinks.

    If any of you have ever gone tubing, then you have some idea of the shape I was in when I met her for drinks that night. The good news was that she liked to drink just a much as I did, and thought drunk me was hilarious. We ended up have a great time, went our separate ways after a small kiss, and everything just built from there. Things were sped up a little bit by the pregnancy, obviously, but I can honestly say that she and the baby are the best things to ever happen to me, and I do it the same way again if I had a choice.

    So that's my mushy story- muchos gracias, yo soy El Nino, all that good stuff.

    The best part, though, is that she inspired me to start my new hobby! SOY OBSESSED-O!
    [​IMG]
     
    #21 Blue Dog, Jun 23, 2011
  2. Blue Dog

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    To be fair- EVERYTHING is better when put into Taco-terms. I'm not the weird one for liking tacos- anybody who DOESN'T like tacos is the weird one.

    And I wanna say that 10 tacos or 5 mole' enchiladas will rent you a burro for an hour, but I'll have to confirm. I normally eat my Mexican money before I can haggle a good deal...
     
    #22 Blue Dog, Jun 23, 2011
  3. effinshenanigans

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    Well, you know what they say: attaining wealth isn't the hard part, it's hanging onto it that's tough.
     
    #23 effinshenanigans, Jun 23, 2011
  4. hooker

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    I took tomorrow off to drink and go fuck myself. Summer is officially here, so I feel kind of obligated to do it outdoors.

    Two long weekends in a row. Thank God. Cheers.
     
    #24 hooker, Jun 23, 2011
  5. Jimmy James

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    I'm getting a long weekend too. And it will be awesome. However, I did not have an awesome morning. I had a fake boner when I woke up. My girlfriend had stayed the night, and wanting to get my Thursday off to a great start, we decided to get busy. Only problem was that my morning wood was caused not by naked titties, but the fact that I had to take a racehorse whiz. I didn't realize this until about ten minutes of fruitless thrusting.

    And then my front tire blew out on the freeway. Yay, Thursday.
     
    #25 Jimmy James, Jun 23, 2011
  6. Nettdata

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    It's pissing down rain today, and is expected to off and on for the next week. Joy.

    So, got all domestic this morning and made some home made bread and a stew. House smells fucking awesome.

    Then got pissed at my shower this morning, and bailed half way through to grab the Dremel tool. 10 minutes later, with bits of plastic and metal shavings everywhere, I now have at least triple the flow and pressure. Hell yeah.

    "But, what about water conservation?"

    FUCK THAT.

    I live in a rain forest, and my water comes from a well. Nuff said.
     
    #26 Nettdata, Jun 23, 2011
  7. effinshenanigans

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    So you peed inside her?
     
    #27 effinshenanigans, Jun 23, 2011
  8. Nettdata

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    And "cheers".

    Here's to Polar Bears. (I make them half hot chocolate, half coffee, shot of peppermint schnapps, and a splash of Frangelico).
     
    #28 Nettdata, Jun 23, 2011
  9. MoreCowbell

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    He went to Tijuana and woke up handcuffed to her in the back of his pickup truck. With wedding rings and a camouflage tuxedo. She wouldn't leave.

    I don't care if that isn't the real story. It should be.
     
    #29 MoreCowbell, Jun 23, 2011
  10. Nettdata

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    And he was handcuffed to a well-manicured donkey.
     
    #30 Nettdata, Jun 23, 2011
  11. MoreCowbell

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    What a rude thing to say about his wife.
     
    #31 MoreCowbell, Jun 23, 2011
  12. Blue Dog

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    For real. Its called a fucking "burro". Show some respect and get it right, ya goddamn Nanook.
     
    #32 Blue Dog, Jun 23, 2011
  13. ssycko

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    He didn't even have to be 471st post in this thread? Lame.
     
    #33 ssycko, Jun 23, 2011
  14. Nettdata

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    "burro show" doesn't have the same ring to it.
     
    #34 Nettdata, Jun 23, 2011
  15. Devils Advocate

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    Sounds like the redneck version of The Hangover.
     
    #35 Devils Advocate, Jun 23, 2011
  16. Nettdata

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    Well, they did have a naked Asian dude in the trunk, so it had some similarities...
     
    #36 Nettdata, Jun 23, 2011
  17. Jimmy James

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    I'm never drinking tequila again.
     
    #37 Jimmy James, Jun 23, 2011
  18. Devils Advocate

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    What's wrong with tequila?
     
    #38 Devils Advocate, Jun 23, 2011
  19. Nettdata

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    The naked Asian dudes in the trunk of your car... aren't you paying attention?
     
    #39 Nettdata, Jun 23, 2011
  20. effinshenanigans

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    I think he was insinuating that he was the naked Asian dude.
     
    #40 effinshenanigans, Jun 23, 2011
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