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Fuck it, the TiB Weekly Drunk Thread [06/18/2010]

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by CharlesJohnson, Jun 18, 2010.

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  1. Nitwit

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    On a more serious note, whenever I cum in the morning and then pee at lunch? I think it's the dried semen in my whatever it is that Ghetto calls it that causes my stream to split and splash my trousers.
     
  2. zyron

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    Did you ever wake up and piss and it goes at like a 45 degree angle of where it should?
     
  3. hotwheelz

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    Once they get past that line, they're no longer controllable.
     

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  4. Stimpson J Cat

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    How did we get so far off topic?

    Halle Berry anyone?
    [​IMG]
    Pulls the short hair look off better than any other celebrity.
     
  5. MoreCowbell

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    Just saw Jonah Hex. It wasn't that much of an improvement of the original version of it. You know, Wild Wild West.

    Raises hand. Like he didn't already feel old.


    Alternative statement: there is always an excuse for Creedance.

     
    #105 MoreCowbell, Jun 19, 2010
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  6. Nitwit

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    Yup. That's exactly why I head out to the deck.

    Plus, those angles always keep the cat guessing.

    Well, mostly it's just nice to pull my dick out and piss to the sunrise, but freaking out the cat is a bonus.

    It's gotten to where I see him tense up and wait..................he just knows; game on. Bring it Master!

    Mostly, He runs but I have seen him on occasion kick back between two streams and mock me, though. The shake always sends his ass to the bushes; little fucker.
     
  7. Crown Royal

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    That's not really flattering the film. Santa Claus Conquers the Martians was better than Wild Wild West.

    Hollywood really flushed their blockbuster season into Septicville this summer as far as blockbuster movies go. The A Team, Robin Hood, Jonah Hex have been panned by pretty much everyone I've talked to (I saw Robin Hood and it's as exciting as a Merchant-Ivory film). Are we gonna get some good ones again, or are we going to continue to let assholes that direct shitty music videos (David Fincher aside) helm 100 million dollar films? I mean, does it take a diamond-tipped stake through the heart to kill off Michael Bay, this unholy grotesque apparition? Where the hell is old-school John McTiernan and middle-school Paul Verhoeven when you need them?
     
  8. Nitwit

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    Posted this on a suggestion thread that never made it. In my opinion, nothing else needs to be said ever about men and woman. Greatest scene in television history.

     

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  9. Nitwit

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    I'm so drunk I can't even not post double nice tits with intriguing dialogue.

    Fuck it.

    Just ban me.
     
  10. MoreCowbell

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    Exactly my point.
     
  11. jennitalia

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    What's the female equivalent of blue balls?
     
  12. hotwheelz

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    Purple clit?
     
  13. pincinelly

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    Been drinking for a few hours and in a good mood because I got a job this week. About to go out with some friends and watch the All Blacks smash the Welsh, drink myself into oblivion and forget about the dissertation that is due in a month that I have to do until tomorrow.
     
  14. Sleeves

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    Wow...Did i ever get bitch slapped off my high horse these past two weeks. I've applied for about 20 jobs, had 3 interviews and didn't get any of them. The worst part is that two of them were hiring two people and at one of the two they interviewed only three people. Back to the nursing home from hell it is. I fucking suck. I always thought I was a nice, clean cut, well rounded person, but I might have to look in the mirror and re-evaluate my place in society.
    Damn.. At least tommorow I am getting completely blasted since this whole summer I've drank heavily only twice... And I call myself a man. The more I read through this post the more I realize that i'm a complete failure so im just going to end it here.
     
  15. ghettoastronaut

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    I have reached the stage of my life where everyone I know is getting married. And because I'm 21, it's also the phase where everyone getting married are a bunch of fucking retards. Let me go through the list:

    -girl, 20, cheats on her fiance and only wants to get married because they are both in the military and might as well reap some of the short term financial benefits. Also, wants to get married now because that way by the time they divorce she's still young and do-able. Doesn't that just inspire confidence as a military officer and reflect well on women in the Canadian Forces. Thinks $12,000 is "not a lot" to spend on a ring.

    -girl, 22, has a fiance 10 years her senior and is going to spend about $12,000 on the ring. Upon being questioned about this ridiculous sum to spend on a piece of jewelry that is only supposed to symbolise something that is already there, she responds that she isn't good with words and should ask our other married friend; suggests that society dictates that how serious a male is about marriage is proportional to the amount spent on the ring relative to his overall income. She didn't explicitly say that she believes this but she sure is looking forward to benefitting from it. Also, her fiance-to-be has the idea that he wants to buy a Canadian diamond because he has the slightly ridiculous notion that a blood diamond is a bad omen. This girl's reason for objection to this? "I'm like, 'whofuckingcares?'", said in a note that rapidly approaches manic desperation. Also, says that getting married will actually ensure they stay together for the rest of their lives because she doesn't believe in divorce. Says the fiance is willing to wait for 4 years while she goes off and does her obligatory service to the military and then comes back. Also, this is the only serious relationship she's ever had and made some noises about ignorance being bliss regarding anyone else's sexual performance because then your husband is the best you've ever had.

    There are others that are getting married but other than the fact that they're all 23 and under they aren't quite as stupid. Why, one girl suggested that $12,000 was an order of magnitude above what she considers a reasonable limit for an engagement ring and her entire wedding budget - ring, dress, church, reception - was half of what this other girl's ring is going to cost.

    In unrelated news, I am really liking this whole business of drinking on weeknights. I sure do like spending time with friends away from school.
     
  16. Frank

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    Jesus fucking Christ, where did you find these people? How can you be 21 and know several peers that are getting married? Hell, I'm 26 and not a single one of my core friends from high school is even engaged yet, and trust me it's not because they can't find anyone.

    You need new friends man, the last thing you need is to be peer pressured into starting a family in the next two years because "everyone else is doing it"

    Trust me, it happens.

    Also, I'm willing to wager that your first friend already planning divorce is not going to find the "right time" to pull the trigger anytime soon it and will wind up in a 10 year marriage filled with deceit, unhappiness and pain for all involved.
     
  17. ghettoastronaut

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    Where do I find these people? I did mention they were in the military, didn't I? It's pretty much the biggest stereotype that people in the military get married way too young, though do know some people who are married young and not in the military. There was a nice discussion of it in the GBTM thread, but the reasons boil down to the following:

    -the military provides powerful financial incentives to get married, especially if both of you are in the military and you have any chance of being posted away from each other. For the first girl, marriage means getting a lot of separation pay
    -the want for something solid and non-variable in life despite the inevitable fact that you're going to be moving around, moving away, and potentially getting deployed
    -joining the military is often the first grown-up decision that people make; they often haven't even lived away from their parents when they go out to basic training. So, in for a penny, in for a pound, and people think that suddenly they have enough life experience to commit to someone for the rest of their lives.

    This is in accompaniment to the standard reasons: afraid of being alone, because they can't live together while they're unmarried because their parents will disapprove, because they are in true love, because they are smarter and different than the 50% of couples who divorce, because they are incredibly mature for their age, because it's a twelve fucking thousand dollar ring, you know.

    Also, don't worry about peer pressure to get married and start a family in the next two years. It's not my scene.

    EDIT: Funny story, another buddy of mine got married the day before shipping out to basic training. His honeymoon was five weeks of being confined to barracks and then ten weeks of only seeing her on weekends.
     
  18. Dread

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    Well... He was right about the sociopath thing.
     
  19. taste_my_rainbow

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    My parents went on vacation and left their dog with me. That little bastard sleeps under the covers and brought mother fucking ticks with him. I've found seven on me and two were stuck. Gross. I'm going to end up with Rocky Mountain Spotted Fever or Lyme Disease and I am not ok with that. I also gave him an awesome bath yesterday and he promptly went outside and found shit* to roll in.


    *It might not have been actual fecal matter, could have been something dead. All I know is that he stunk.
     
  20. Fernanthonies

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    Shazam!

    Now its time to get another hour or two of sleep before I have to go eat with my step-dad and then prepare for our cookout tonight.
     
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