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Happy Cold Fold Festival (China) Drunk Thread

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Nom Chompsky, Apr 5, 2013.

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  1. VanillaGorilla

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    Creampie does have a good nicknamey ring to it, though.
     
  2. Kubla Kahn

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    Yeah, that's why there is a whole genre of it in porn and not the one where they bust in a condom and then drizzle it all over the girl.
     
  3. Binary

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    Jesus, dude.

    I just... don't know what to say here.

    You've got four kids between the two of you and neither one of you know how the baby making mechanics work?
     
  4. xrayvision

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    I have a situation I would like to run by the board. No one in my life seem to be any good at giving advice.

    A week ago yesterday, my car was stolen right off the driveway of the house that I have just moved out of. I was doing some yard work wearing athletic shorts and had no pockets so all of my things were left in the car. The person took my wallet and phone. I only saw the back of his head as I was yelling for him to stop as he drove away. I went through all the steps and cancelled my credit cards and protected my identity and whatnot.

    About 4 hours later, my car was found wrecked and brought to an impound lot.

    I cancelled my cell phone service on my phone but since its an iPhone, my apple Id was still active. I guess he didn't know this when he went messaging people on the phone. Because now I have his first name, his age, the possible name of his school, his mom or grandmother's phone number and address(through reverse lookup) and where he goes to the boys and girls club and the name and number of some little ho that he's been chatting up.

    He also took some photos and they went straight to my photo stream. I also have his face and his little brothers face. Unfortunately, there was no geotagging on the photos. But I feel I have a plethora of information to help this investigation. I told the police about it but they seem to have very little interest in figuring this out. Even though the kid took about 300 rounds of .45 acp.

    Any advice that won't land me in jail?
     
  5. Juice

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    Yeah, immediately report the stolen ammunition if you haven't already. It's a crime if you do not within a certain period of time. Look up the timeline first, and if its past it, lawyer up.

    Are these local police? If so, go to the state police. They're the ones that should be dealing with it anyway. Go directly to the precinct or barracks and explain the situation. If still nothing or they send you back to the local PD, hire that lawyer to guide you through the process of taking care of this. Them not helping you could result in a lawsuit.
     
  6. T0m88

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    Well, he's apparently now well-armed, so I wouldn't advise a confrontation.
     
  7. xrayvision

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    Its the Houston PD. I've called them a couple times to tell them what I know. I feel like I'm practically handing them this kid and it would be so easy to catch him. I just want to recoup the damages to my car. It looks to be in the thousands. They know all about the ammo.
     
  8. silway

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    Disclaimer: I am not a TX lawyer and you should consult with one. I can't give you legal advice.

    Potentially the FBI or ATF may be interested in this. Ditto Apple.
     
  9. Juice

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    Go down to the Houston PD HQ, find out which detective is handling the case, and contact them directly. There might be more going on than you realize behind the scenes and they might be on top of it. But you have a right to know at least some basic info. Otherwise, absolutely lawyer up.

    Do not go the vigilante route. You will go to prison.
     
  10. xrayvision

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    I didn't plan on going after him myself. I only meant it would be very easy for the police to catch him with all the info I acquired. Going vigilante on a minor is the fast track to the clink. They gave me a number just now to get a patrol officer to come to me so I can give him all the information I have.
     
  11. Juice

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    That's a good start, follow with them on Friday or Saturday, if no progress, then consider hiring an attorney or at the very least, contact the Houston DAs office.
     
  12. GTE

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    You'd be surprised how many guys are against that. Several of my friends and my brother are all mid-late 30's, have several kids, don't want more kids, wives don't want any more and yet they won't get snipped. I said that if/when the GF and I get married, I'm getting fixed. They all looked at me like I was nuts. They'd rather risk another kid and have their SO's on hormonal birth control than do a little out patient surgery. Selfish if you ask me.


    Edit - little late to the convo with all the PD talk going on now.
     
  13. Hoosiermess

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    I'm with you on this. If I wait much longer to get married I may go ahead and get fixed. I don't want to be sixty when my kids graduate. At my age (35) I'm likely to marry someone who already has kids (and I'm ok with that) so its not a big deal anyway.

    Full disclosure: I've never felt a real strong urge to be a parent. I like kids and get along great with them (mostly) but I fluctuate back and forth between wanting my own and not caring.
     
  14. ghettoastronaut

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    A) to paraphrase that great wordsmith of our time, Piers Morgan, what the bloody hell is wrong with you Americans? Plan B has been available without a prescription for years and only now you consider slipping it into an unsuspecting female's drink the next morning? Holy fuck. Step your clandestine medicating game up. Also stop having such a fucked up cultural relaionship with women's birth control, it's scaring me.

    B) because Plan B works by preventing ovulation and almost certainly does not operate via preventing implantation of a conceptus and absolutely does not cause an implanted fetus to miscarry, any "crime" would not be under that law about killing babies / fetuses. There may be some other law applying to medicines more directly (i.e. Similar to a law against using roofies) but just because you are more likely to hear scare stories about rapists using plan b on their victims doesn't mean much. There were a few of my classmates who said they'd refuse to dispense plan b to a man on the basis that they'd suspect him of being a rapist. God damned morons.

    C) yes, plan B has to be taken within 72 hours but ideally less than 24 hours after sex. This all depends on what phase of the cycle she's in or how many birth control pills were missed and when. A copper IUD can go in up to 5 days post unprotected sex. You need to wait ideally until the day of or after the expected period for a pregnancy test to turn back a reliable negative. Et cetera.
     
  15. Parker

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    I can't wait to get snipped. Hell I'd do it right now if I could. It is also reversible. Then I could be painting wombs with baby batter care free! O HAPPY DAY!
    Why there are dudes that are scared of it freaks me out. I've seen too many women talk about BC adding 5-10lbs to them, on top of the fact it could still fail. I rather take the hit and have it impossible for women to baby trap me.

    Edlt: ghetto's post is at once very pretentious and informative, but mostly pretentious.
     
  16. ghettoastronaut

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    Hey, Parker, the above doesn't apply to you. The waves of orgasm you induce cause the uterus to expel any and all semen, rendering the female infertile for a period of 12 hours. Not to mention the blunt force trauma intimidates the ovaries into a non-ovulatory state.
     
  17. Parker

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    Your kind words touch my soul.
     
  18. toddamus

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    I imagine dudes are more afraid of the procedure than the effects. Getting your balls snipped sounds pretty unpleasant, granted not as unpleasant as another mouth to feed for 20+ years. Hell, maybe I should get snipped. I'm sure I don't want a child because of the personal challenges I've faced, no reason to pass that on. However, at my age (27) I imagine if I told woman that I'm snipped that'd be a hard sell and a game changer for some potential SO's. I imagine it'd be a long uncomfortable conversation.
     
  19. ghettoastronaut

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    Your kind penis touches my cervix.
     
  20. FreeCorps

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    Watching the winter exhibition quarterfinals on one screen while running Euro adjustments on the other. My job isn't so bad.
    Woooooooo
     
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