Ya know, your dick has to be hard to get in that vagina successfully. It would be impossible to get that cotton piece in there without some help. edit: xray beat me but my comment will stay!
Must be nice to live in a state where you can buy from a package store on a Sunday. Fucking Connecticut.
From the ones Ive seen they are kind of like heavy woven or kind of like hard molded? I mean the things are denser than cotton balls right? Anyways I like to think about the pleasant days when they aren't bleeding.
So I decided to be an optimist for once and went to my parents' place to ride my motorcycle around. Not only did the weather hold up, the sun even came out. And on the topic of staring at women's breasts, a girl was jogging and her boobs were on display and, by the judge of it, preparing for nettdata's trampoline party. And you know what? They made my fucking day. Before those boobs I was within inches of physically assaulting children on the subway. After? Who gives a fuck, boobs! I should send her a thank-you card.
Is there anyone else out there watching the Gypsy Wedding show on TLC right now? For a bunch of people living in what would be English trailer parks, their women are hot. And skanky.
They are usually cotton. I know you normally think of cotton as light and fluffy, but it can be processed into something denser. I mean, you wear cotton socks and tshirts. Tampons are somewhere in the middle. It's also the reason they expand when they become damp. I'm sure you've seen the commercials.
Oh dear, what have I done? I went to go buy Coronas but the Miller High Life was on sale. The Jew inside me started shrieking about money so I went for the High Life. ewwwww Well, on the plus side, once you get past about the 2nd beer, they don't really taste like anything anymore. 1 down, 11 to go....
Man, that felt like forever ago. My trip to Walgreens took less than 10 minutes but it felt like I was gone forever. Time is strange, isn't it? I'm starting to hate going to that Walgreens. There's this enormous black man who always sees me buying booze and it makes me feel guilty. Probably because the first time I was in there buying wine, I was in my pajamas at 9pm and he told me in a kindly, fatherly voice to stay safe. Today I was walking through the store and spotted him, so I took a quick detour to the left so that he wouldn't see my beer.
On the topic of beer, the local liquor consortium has decided to carry real beer for once. There were at least four varieties of Rogue, plus some Sam Adams that wasn't the boston lager. I know what I'm doing tomorrow.
You just made me realize that our ABC stores don't really carry beer. If you want beer, you have to go to Wal Mart, a gas station, a convenience store...but not the official alcohol vendor for the state. So weird.
We have Spec's here. The one downtown is like mecca. They have beer there that I hadn't been able to find in years. Corsendonk Abbey Brown is a spectacular beverage. If you have the chance to try it, I highly recommend. Their wine selection is absurd. They have more brands than most stores have bottles.
I just saw that your location is Houston! I had a long diatribe about state alcohol control typed up earlier but I deleted it. Basically, ABC controls our alcohol here and taxes the shit out of it, so my family (ie my dad who consumes a shitton of Evan Williams) buys their liquor in Houston when we visit family, or have them bring booze when they drive over here. I've been inside Spec's...it is like Disney World for booze. I envy you.
Vodka is shit. If you mean you were going to drink vodka straight, then shame on you. The only other purpose of that stuff is to flavor juice and mixes for girly drinks. Scotch is good but I like bourbon better.
I normally take it with tonic water and some lemon juice, but after today I was kind of feeling like the most naked vehicle possible for alcohol delivery would hit the spot. In chemistry nerd news: four carbons warm your food; two carbons warm your soul.
So, I'm playing ball today and three beers deep into a shutout when an enormous front moves in from Michigan and the angels start bowling. Much to our amusement, for about five long seconds the clouds swirl into a vortex directly over top of us. Then God yells "SIKE!!!!!" Talk about making 25 adults lose their collective shit. Oh well, it was after 5 innings so it counts as a win plus I think I broke a new world record for Speed Obtained While Running For A Car.
How dare you. Scotch is miles better than bourbon. I prefer not to have the subtleties of corn in my whisky thankyouverymuch.
What, huh? Vodka is not shit madam. How dare you. Edit: Add a second slap like the one Iwantsomejuice just posted.