Hi, I'd like you to meet my son. His name is Blayde.

And I'm sure you got sterling customer service during your time with this company.

I was talking to my friend yesterday who was a New York City public school teacher. One of his coworkers had a student named Shadynasty. After attempting to hesitantly pronounce it "Shady-nasty", he was told it was "Sha-dynasty."

 

My parents were ridiculously lazy when naming me. Both of my grandfathers, one of my grandmothers, and one of my great grandfathers share my name. I was going to be a Joe if I came out a boy or a girl.
I've always loved the name Jasper for some reason. Old school enough to be unusual, but somewhat cool sounding to not seem totally out of place in the present.
I have the idea that I want to name my daughter, if I have one, Helena Troy (lastname). However, that might be setting her up for a shitty life sucking dick for rent money

 

My fiance works for CYFD and had a list of ridiculous names she'd heard. The one that sticks out most in my memory is Shithead (shi-thay-ed). So that must be nice for the kid. Also, a guy I work with has a step-grand son with the first name "King David."
Awesome.

I'm not really sure why my parents chose my name, I think it comes from some far removed family on my Dad's side. Although, I'm pretty sure it's because it was at the first one in the name book.

 

I'm named after my great grandfather, as is my father and oldest son. Because it skipped my grandfather's generation my Dad is the II, I am the III and my son is the IV - I wonder if the dynasty will live on?

My four oldest children have very traditional names. My oldest daughter is named after her great grandmothers - Jennifer Ann, my second daughter is named after my wife and mother-in-law - Elizabeth Jane, my oldest son is named after me - Joseph (no middle name), my second son is named Matthew Robert - his first name means "a gift from God" since he was the best mistake I ever made and his middle name is after my father-in-law. My two youngest children are adopted from Korea and we kept their given first names. Their middle names are my maternal grandparent's surname to give them a family connection.

So we have a mixed bag of names - the four oldest very New England/Waspy and the two youngest very Asian and they all have a Swedish last name! Such is life...

 

Focus: One of my sister's students a couple years ago was named La-a, pronounced "Ladasha." My mom had a couple students from one family with great names. Hunter, then Fisher, and they had a younger brother named Trapper.

Alt-Focus: My name isn't anything exceptional, aside from having a last name practically everyone mispronounces (one of those fun German ones). My middle name is my father's first.

 

Come on now, thats widely know to be an urban legend.

<a class="postlink" href="http://www.snopes.com/racial/language/le-a.asp" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;">http://www.snopes.com/racial/language/le-a.asp</a>

This one too. Both of those names are always "a friend's sister is a teacher" or "someone I know at social services". Nobody has ever ran into either. But I guess that says something about naming trends if urban legends can develop about ridiculous names.

 

No BS man, real story. She taught at a public charter school in North Minneapolis for a couple of years and came across some interesting names there but that one was the winner.

 

Roxanne is an old Persian name that means the first star of the morning. I asked them if they were planning to go with Lucifer if I were a boy, but there was no comment.

I also maintain that given my birth in the 80s, and my mom's love affair with The Police, that there is no way in God's fiery hell that they didn't name me after the song and set me up for a life of trying to resist the sweet siren call of prostitution.

 

The biggest problem I have with names is if they are a retarded variation. I know someone mention Bryce, but I don't hate that name as much as I hate Sahrah, Tonee, Kristynah, or Mishell. But I'm tired of knowing 4 dudes name John, 3 guys named Mike, 5 guys named Tim, 2 guys named Mark, and another 4 guys named Matt, who all hangout. Then we have to go by their super fucking annoying Anglo last names. I'll take a Bryce over a Mike/Matt/Mark any goddamn day.

 

My wife has taught in a fairly ghetto school for the last few years, but the best Bad Baby Name she brought home was from teaching in a rural county an hour north.

Shadiamond Pimpshay (insert last name).

Ho-lee-shizzlesticks, that is awful. AND, she had a sister named Sercaydes (think Mercedes).

As for my name, my mom wanted me to be a Jr, but dear old dad wanted me to be my own man. They compromised, so my first name is her grandfather's middle name, and my middle name is my dad's first name. I've got a bit more ego than my dad, so if I ever have a son, he'll be a Jr, since I already have the wife's blessing.

 

I've been in a number of relationships with black girls, so there are some weird ones I have come across. For instance, one girl had a sister named "Paris". It's weird, but nothing too bizarre, right? Well, I later found out it wasn't spelled "Paris". It was actually "Parees".

I'm also slightly confused/uncomfortable with girls named "Precious", of which I have met a couple of. Every time you call them by their first name, it also doubles as a term of endearment.

 

Since D'Brickashaw is already taken I'm all out of ideas.

 

When I was still on the phones at work, I scheduled an abortion for L-shnay. (Ledashenay.) Apparently this is an old joke, so maybe she was lying, but it happened.

 

A good friend of mine just had a son and named him Kylan Leander. When he told me what he planned to name the kid, I kept a straight face because I wasn't sure if he was fucking with me or not.

And then there is a cousin that is about to pop out her second kid and, surprise surprise, is naming him Bryce. Gotta have another unique and trendy name to go along with his brother, Braxton. There is a reason we rarely speak to each other.

 

You've convinced me to name my kids Rum, Tequila, Vodka, Gin, and Triple Sec. Then move the brood to Long Island.

White people do some stupid fucking shit. My co-worker's nephew is named Raylin... Raylin. Yeah, did I mention it's a boy?

She said, "It's a cross between my name and our brother's name, Ryan!" I looked at her a beat too long before saying how cute that is. Hint: I lied.

I understand the adding of syllables to names like Shawn, Wallace, Lewis. DeShawn, DaWallace, ShaLewis. They're trying to make the name stand out, make it powerful, beautiful. It does make it stand out, for the wrong reason, and does the exact opposite for the other attributes. There will never, NEVER, be a Supreme Court Justice DeShawn no matter the accomplishments of the individual. Just like President Raylin and Senate Majority Leader Camden-Bryce James is nothing but a fallacious daydream from the mind of the sick pervert that dreamed up that shit stain of a name.

 

If I have a son there's even odds that his name will be either [silway] jr. or Diocletian.

 

I played basketball against Scientific Mapp and God Shammgod (when he was still Shammgod Wells) in high school.

Scientific had a brother named Majestic Mapp, who was also a very good player.

My favorite urban legend names are, spelled phonetically, "FE-mal-eh" and her brother "MAL-eh." The story goes that the woman had twins, but hadn't yet made up her mind, and she liked the names the hospital picked.

 

Same as with me and my father, his father, his father, and on back to right around the 1830's if I recall. I just happened to luck out and have a Areosmith fan for a mother. The jokes and comments get a little old, but it is a pretty bitching name.

 

I met a huge black guy in the IT department of a local Hospital named Bacardi. I did a double take when he told me his name but I didn't have time to ask him how it was spelled. He didn't seem very bright to be working in IT either. Kinda reminded me of that big dumb security guard from the movie Employee of the Month. I bet he had a sister named Coke.

 

This just reminded me - and this is true, no urban legend. My father-in-law is very Italian - his parents were off the boat Italian. His mother was a twin - her name was Prima (first) and her younger twin sister was Secunda (second). My father-in-law is in his early eighties so that means his mother was born at least 100 or so years ago. I guess stupid names have been around for a really, really long time!