Did you think I was kidding when I said I had Asian relatives? There were approximately 4 Asians in Mississippi when I lived there. I was related to all of them. I visited my sister today and we all sat around staring at a tomato. My niece looked at me and said "We have the most boring pets. Ever." Actually it was a big tortoise, but it was about as interesting as a tomato. I'm surprised they haven't eaten it yet.
For some reason, I read this out loud in a dirty Russian accent and it seemed to also fit. Minus the rice field stuff.
I don't really get the appeal of taking a shower when you're drunk. I feel like it's a thing that people like to do while drunk, but so far I've done it three times and it's always ended poorly. Once was drunk shower sex and that was just dangerous. The second time was with the same guy who picked me up and threw me in the shower to try and calm me down because I was drunk and feisty and that was just alarming. And the third time was just now because I had to to prepare for a weekend trip yet still succumbed to the siren song of getting drinks with my coworkers after work, and it just ended up with twice as much shampoo in my eye and about eight times more cuts while shaving. Shrug.
You tell me. This is either ballsy, or this guy is the biggest douchebag I've ever seen in person. We weren't even at the club. He showed up to an improv show in these. Yes those are newspaper print pants. Spoiler
You've got it all wrong. You should be drinking while taking a bath, not drinking then getting in the shower.
Because that's dangerous. If I had nickel for every time I drunkenly hurt myself in the shower I'd have like $1.35. (That's 27 times for those of you bad at math.) I tend to inadvertently injure myself much more often then mere chance would dictate.
Good husbands encourage their wives to be great people and work to reach their dreams. Meanwhile I encourage my wife to flash the commuter trains passing our picnic spot.
I want to party with this chick. Kind of want a beer now. Time to start up my smoker. There's pork to be had today with homemade chipotle bbq sauce. Sex.
Jenny12Many can 'talk' to me all she wants. Wow. The ladies (all of them) are absolutely killing it in the boobie thread. Ladies, thank you. More importantly, my 'thank you' takes the form of not posting any pictures of myself. Believe me, this is about as big a thank you as any person could ever receive from me.
Well, fresh off the news I don't have a job next school year, I'm totally going out and dropping a hefty sum on a Mother's Day gift today. Ahh jewelry. Unrelated note: been watching Looney Toons all morning with the kid. She loves it and its like I'm watching Saturday morning cartoons again.
Shower sex in general is just a mess. Sure foreplay works well in there, but I havent really done it since college, and even then was a last resort since the roommate was hanging around. When you have your own place and you live with your partner, theres no point in risking a nasty painful slip.
Couldn't disagree more. I like having a tile lined space to clean up after sex. Plus I don't have to carry the whole body from some other room to begin disposal procedures. Or is it just me?
Agreed 100%. Shower foreplay is great, but shower sex, no dice. The last time I tried shower sex was years ago while on a college spring break cruise. If you've been on a cruise, you know how tiny the showers are. I am not sure what possessed me to think that sex in one of those coffins made any sense. After the girl and I finally worked ourselves into a manageable position, I accidentally bumped the temperature control with my elbow and the water instantly went from comfortable to oh-my-god-it's-fucking-scalding-I'm-throwing-you-across-the-undersized-bathroom hot.
As soon as it cools in the refrigerator for half an hour, I'm going to enjoy some home made guacomole. Its silly how excited I am for this.
...and you initial ninja reaction when you slip is to grab the hollow shower curtain rod which has an approximate zero weight limit so what started as a simple, peaceful concussion turns into a slapstick shitshow and you better PRAY your friends aren't in the same house with their cellphone cameras when the ruckus occurs. Shower sex only looks good in movies. But then again, movies have bedroom sex with 600 lit candles and that looks good, instead of blistering hot which is what is would actually be. Shower sex in real life results in contusions, near-drownings, awkwardness and death. Sexual Chocolate: try mango Guac some time. It's heaven.
I notice Nitwit doesn't post as much since the whole come-down on the videos. Did he kill himself or something?