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Holiday Drunk Thread

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Nom Chompsky, Dec 6, 2013.

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  1. Binary

    Binary
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    You're really missing out on a golden opportunity to screw with people.

    For instance, a laxative and habanero pepper diet.

    Taco bell and blocks of cheese.

    Asparagus and cranberry juice.
     
    #2601 Binary, Jan 7, 2014
  2. shimmered

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    Asparagus and cranberry juice is my new answer.


    4 12 oz glasses of cranberry juice a day. Unlimited water. 1 serving of asparagus for dinner.
     
    #2602 shimmered, Jan 7, 2014
  3. Kubla Kahn

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    Did I just shit myself?

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    But that one dude on Netflix lost 50 lbs and stopped taking allergy medicine because he juiced vegetables for a month. EXPLAIN THAT ONE TO ME MISS PALEO CAVEWOMAN!
     
    #2603 Kubla Kahn, Jan 7, 2014
  4. Binary

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    I just hope you don't have to use the same bathroom as the clients at your gym.
     
    #2604 Binary, Jan 7, 2014
  5. shimmered

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    I actually wouldn't doubt that.
    Without devolving into a foodligion discussion, removing processed/false foods and added sugar from a diet goes A LONG WAY to improving overall health. I'm not even talking about gluten, I'm talking about the shit that goes with gluten. And sugar. Sugar is the goddamn devil.
     
    #2605 shimmered, Jan 7, 2014
  6. Rush-O-Matic

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    Step 1. Write an inspiring introduction about your life, getting to this point: Something something lessons, something something beautiful children, something something a bunch of references to quotes like "journey of a thousand miles begins with the first step" (Chapters 1-7)

    Chapter 8:
    Step 2. Creative photo of asparagus and cranberry juice for cover

    Step 3: Profit

    You can have the next diet best-seller.
     
    #2606 Rush-O-Matic, Jan 7, 2014
  7. shimmered

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    #2607 shimmered, Jan 7, 2014
  8. Binary

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    shimmered, if you make a million dollars off this diet, I demand royalties.
     
    #2608 Binary, Jan 7, 2014
  9. D26

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    And there is the call, tomorrow off too. I'll be drinking myself stupid and playing Assassin's Creed IV multiplayer til 1 am again!
     
    #2609 D26, Jan 7, 2014
  10. jdoogie

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    Don't forget the "recommended" supplementary pills that will somehow magically remove all the toxins from your body as well as helping with the odor side-effects from aforementioned diet.
     
    #2610 jdoogie, Jan 7, 2014
  11. JWags

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    My friends are still stuck in West Lafayette since Sunday night. Supposedly I-65 just opened back up but they are recommending emergency vehicles only.
     
    #2611 JWags, Jan 7, 2014
  12. Currer Bell

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    What's funny about the diet brainstorming session here is that on another message board we have been brainstorming how to make the bacon bowl even more heart-attacky.

    When you think about it, this is the perfect corporate long term diversification plan. One subdivision introduces a new Denny's Pancake Bacon Bowl Blitz and then six months later another subdivision publishes the Aspara-Berry Cleanse book. Meanwhile the clothing subdivision makes a steady fortune off the customers increasing and decreasing in size.
     
    #2612 Currer Bell, Jan 7, 2014
  13. Crown Royal

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    Just call me Topher

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    Don't forget to give it a slick name, like Provasic or Dietease or Horseshit.
     
    #2613 Crown Royal, Jan 7, 2014
  14. Atoq

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    Fun fact from a lurker: The origin of the word "Parana" comes from a combination of an indigenous amazonian language and Portuguese, and means "River". The Parana River means: The River River.

    Carry on.
     
    #2614 Atoq, Jan 7, 2014
  15. shimmered

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    The fraidy cat white girl in me does not care about your bilingual logic. The FCWG in me says "IT'S PARANA. PA RA NA. FUCK NO."



    AsparaBerry is the perfect name.
     
    #2615 shimmered, Jan 7, 2014
  16. CharlesJohnson

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    I've been watching Supersize Vs. Superskinny on BBC. A doctor gets a horribly underweight person and a considerably overweight person to switch meal plans. The beginning of the show each person's diet is jettisoned down a tube so they can see exactly what they eat. Blows my mind how these people don't realize 4 candy bars and a lettuce leaf is not a healthy day's intake. "Well, I have no idea why I'm sickly and have no energy." Blows my mind even more when the guy intaking 11,000 calories of processed garbage and cola never realized his problem.

     
    #2616 CharlesJohnson, Jan 7, 2014
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 27, 2015
  17. D26

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    They did reopen 65, but a Semi (apparently) just slid off around exit 230 or 240, and its not closed, but it is still very shitty and way, way backed up behind that Semi.

    I also know that 26 and 52 going towards Illinois from West Lafayette are closed still, so that route isn't an option either. Long story short: They're still fucked for another day or two. I guess Lafayette got hit harder than we did up in "the region."
     
    #2617 D26, Jan 7, 2014
  18. Rush-O-Matic

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    Hmm, that sounds too much like a syndrome. Might better go with Cranagus. Ooh, or New Cranagus!
     
    #2618 Rush-O-Matic, Jan 7, 2014
  19. Rush-O-Matic

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    Wait, wait. New Cranagus 8 Day Diet.
     
    #2619 Rush-O-Matic, Jan 7, 2014
  20. shimmered

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    For some reason that makes me think of anal. Which...no.
     
    #2620 shimmered, Jan 7, 2014
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