In other news, an Oklahoma man died after receiving an atomic wedgie from his 33-year-old step-son. There are a lot of really crappy ways to die, but slowly suffocating while observing ones' own skidmarks has to be amongst the crappiest. See what I did there?
It's nice to know I live in a city that's at least 25% mentally challenged. This, I swear on my child, is an ACTUAL POLL from the front page of our paper: That's it, I am outta here. It's impossible for that many people to be so stupid.
Just for clarification, when you say stupid people, are you referring to the 26% who believe in bigfoot or the 74% who don't believe in bigfoot? Both numbers are "at least 25%".
I'm referring to the morons who believe that a mythological humanoid is roaming around in the wilderness, waiting to be recorded in blurry images by schizo kooks. What next? Gryphons? Unicorns? Maybe the Hellbat from Jeepers Creepers?