Today I felt like an asshole when I couldn't understand a guy from New Zealand who came in to buy some strings and picks. Usually, you hear an accent, and your brain automatically starts to translate it, so that it makes sense to you. But he was soft-spoken, and I couldn't tell at all. Me: Will that be all today, man? NZ: Do you have any pick gods? Me: I'm sorry? NZ: Pick gods, do you carry them here? Me: ….Pick Gods? Haven't heard of it. (thinking it was some lesson DVD or new accessory I've never heard of). NZ: I'm sorry, pick GAARRRRDS. I always forget my accent is weird here. I apologized, because I really couldn't tell that he wasn't from the US, and didn't mean to make him feel like a pirate.
I just realized something. The drunk thread is where we tell our inebriated yarns. Spoiler (like wordplay)
I need to take a video of my dog dreaming sometime. It's pretty jarring (and hilarious) when he seamlessly goes from sleeping at your feet to growling and pawing at nothing for a few seconds, then back to sleep. I'm really glad hipsters latched onto PBR and not Hamm's. It's cheap but not too cheap, like you don't regret being seen with it and there isn't a sad aftertaste.
You realize that your upbringing isn't a common one, right? Like, not every child gets tricked into searching their father's asshole for treats? Mmkay, good talk.
I think it's because most Americans probably never travel outside of the country and if they do it isn't usually for a significant amount of time. When you get the tourist experience it really is like people from other countries are on a different planet sometimes. Kind of actually looking forward to going to work today to get my mind off shit.
I've not spent much time in Europe outside of London, which seems to be where a lot of the negative treatment originates (or maybe it's just that Europe is a more popular travel destination hence more stories?). Various parts of South and Central America and my time in Tanzania this year have all been very pleasant with not a single instance of being treated like an unwanted tourist or a "stupid American." We've done some "touristy" stuff, of course, where people treat you well because they want money. On the other hand, we have also spent a fair amount of time in local villages, anonymous city wandering, bars or small restaurants, or other off-the-beaten-path excursions. We were actually warned specifically about an older bar in Lima, that it would be very "local" and maybe not for visitors. We found it to be quite pleasant. I continue to believe that, while I'm sure there are cases or areas where being an American gets you treated badly, the vast majority of the time you get treated in accordance with how you act.
Eva Green is a dangerous woman. She reminds me of Sharon Stone in Basic Instinct. Minus the psychopathy. Spoiler She also gets naked a lot: NSFW BEEEEEWBS!
Saying she gets naked a lot is an injustice. My fraternity brother Bucky got naked a lot, and it was never pretty, usually involving drunkeness and duct tape. Eva Green gets naked a lot and you can't take your eyes off the screen. Spoiler She's the only reason "Camelot" wasn't cancelled after two episodes.
I really like her necklace, except maybe in silver. I know, that's what you all were checking out also. And that last picture is what I had to look at in the shower after my old ladies water aerobics class that I taught. Sans boob tattoos. If I dream about saggy shower boobs tonight, I'm blaming you CJ. Which means nothing, but I'll still be doing it.
Now that you've called attention to it, I also like her necklace. In fact it made me realize that the chain plunging into her fantastic cleavage aesthetic is really fucking hot.
I think the real question hasn't been asked. How much would someone have to pay you to have sex with the person in the second picture?