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Holiday Drunk Thread

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Nom Chompsky, Dec 6, 2013.

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  1. Parker

    Parker
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    Emotionally Jaded

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    Dated this girl who called squirting "swirling." Cue to this meeting about a food product where "swirl" is being used every five seconds. I am fighting getting a boner and giggling like a school girl every time its said.
     
  2. Bundy Bear

    Bundy Bear
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    Have a look at the rest of his video stream, that group of kids has some awesome stuff on there, crazy drum solos, Ozzy, Malmsteen and Maiden to name a few other videos on there.
     
    #1682 Bundy Bear, Dec 26, 2013
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 27, 2015
  3. katokoch

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    My brother-in-law got me a bottle of Bulleit bourbon for Christmas. A good start, I say.
     
  4. Frank

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    Yes, even when dead sober. Hasn't happened for a couple years, but it use to be somewhat frequent.
     
  5. Rush-O-Matic

    Rush-O-Matic
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    That is a good start. If you need any wine and rum recommendations, 'wildered may be able to suggest something when she wakes up from her hangover.

    I think zorro is probably right, however

    you never know.
     
  6. Crown Royal

    Crown Royal
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    Just call me Topher

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    My wife is this way and she's only sober. I call it "sleep amnesia" because she has entire gaps in her memory while being tired. She wakes up and it freaks her shit because she forgot how she ended up there. It must feel like you were abducted for a split second because the scenery changes unknowingly.
     
  7. iczorro

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    The group that did "Cowboys from hell" had a kid playing a (I think) PRS that could absolutely shred.
     
    #1687 iczorro, Dec 26, 2013
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 27, 2015
  8. Trakiel

    Trakiel
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    Call me Caitlyn. Got any cake?

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    I asked my mother what to get her husband for Christmas, and she said to give him a nice bottle of scotch. Knowing just about nothing about scotch, and it being 4pm on Chistmas Eve, I had go with my gut and what was available at the liquor stores that were open. I ended up getting him this:

    [​IMG]

    He thanked me for the gift, but I hope I made a good choice.
     
  9. Kubla Kahn

    Kubla Kahn
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    Did I just shit myself?

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    Man, I really fucking hate the owner of my company. Like burning white hot hatred. I honestly did not know I could hate a person to the degree I hate her. Ive watched my dad die of cancer and my grandmother die of Alzheimer's and swore I'd never wish either on anybody. I wish she got both immediately. My only real release would be finding another job (luck has not been on my side yet) or just walking out, hell I'd probably take being fired at this point. Her partner that came in when she bought the company left last week because he couldn't stand working with her any more. I've never seen someone make every single woman she works with on a regular basis cry consistently each week, hell almost every interaction she has with the female staff ends in tears. A true cunt of a woman. No wonder she's unmarried in her 40's.



    Merry Fucking Christmas.
     
  10. Gravy

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    I hope when you find another job you burn that bridge with some sort of glorious revenge act that can be put up on youtube.
     
  11. Kubla Kahn

    Kubla Kahn
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    Did I just shit myself?

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    I mean I spend my days fantasying about Office Space/American Psycho-esque ways of leaving the company. I feel Ill puss out on a "fuck you, fuck you, you're cool, fuck you Im out!" situation and just tell her how unprofessional she treats her underlings and not try and burn the bridge while doing it. Being the longest and most professional job, in the industry I have my degree in, I don't want her poisoning the well if future employers call. Im just a spineless idiot who'll end up in middle management hating my job.
     
  12. whathasbeenseen

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    What do you do and where are you? There has got to be one of us that can help. Life is too short for mindless suffering associated with a job. Fuck. That. Shit.

    Beyond finding an elsewhere, lets brainstorm on fucking her life up. I'll go get my whiskey. It make me smarter.
     
  13. Cult

    Cult
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    My neighbors have been playing "Down Under" by Men at Work for the last 30 minutes nonstop on blast. Just out of curiosity I opened my rolladens to see what was going on in their backyard and saw what appeared to be a 70+ year old woman doing a keg stand, but her ankle length skirt was not being held thus exposing her granny panties.

    Part of my wants to just watch from afar, but the other part wants to go over and get smashed with those people. All I know is that the guy that owns the house is like 80 and the only English he knows is "come over, drink beer"

    Fuck it, I'm going down there.
     
  14. Kubla Kahn

    Kubla Kahn
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    Did I just shit myself?

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    Im not sure how much I should say here since I surf this site at work when I can and Im sure my efforts to delete my trail aren't full proof on our servers. I have internet explorer erase history and cache on exit and have it set up not to remember passwords/log ins. They've never had the tech people look at our server for the purpose to see internet use (we use the internet very very little). We each have our own log in now to the system so tracking wouldn't be too hard for the right people. Im at home typing this now not sure if they'd even to figure out whose handle is mine aside for what Im typing right now (yeesh).


    Ill say I have a degree in marketing and 2+ years experience in market research with a year and a half of that as office supervisor. Unfortunately my job isn't on the project management side of the business so I don't have much in the ways of client interaction or simple project managing (setting up bids, executing jobs as a manager, follow up etc). I think this is what kills 99% of my job applications.
     
  15. Danger Boy

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  16. Currer Bell

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    Are you in Germany? I have never heard anyone refer to those outside of when we lived in Germany for 3 yrs when my dad was stationed there. We lived off-base and our townhouse had them. I freaking loved them. I wish we had those in the U.S.

    Fun fact: until I saw what you wrote, I never knew how it was spelled because I never saw the word in print when I was there.
     
  17. Sicnevol

    Sicnevol
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    Disturbed

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    So I just got done working a 12 hr shift of tech support and did the same yesterday. I just got to my gifts which everyone dropped off to me while i was working.

    So I got $200 cash and s sweet ring form Tiffany's. ( No i'm not engaged, its not that kind of ring.) I need to go get it sized at some point because it is WAAAAY to big.
     
  18. Angel_1756

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    The Big Four-Oh

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    My brother in law got some interesting presents from his grandma this year for Christmas. For a one-sentence backstory on this woman, she's a manager for a pyramid scheme company that tries to cure every single illness from gingivitis to erectile dysfunction through the consumption of a universal "smoothie" and told my sister that grommets on jeans cause cancer.

    Her gifts to my brother in law - diabetic socks (he is not diabetic), a homemade bottle of white wine in a bottle hand labeled as "rat poison", and a battery for a Motorola cell phone - the one the size and weight of a brick. It will not fit his iPhone, we have tried.
     
  19. Juice

    Juice
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    A woman was in a coma. She had been in it for months. Nurses were in her room giving her a sponge bath. One of them was washing her private area and noticed that there was a slight response on the monitor when she touched her.
    They tried it again and sure enough there was definite movement. They went to her husband and explained what happened, telling him, "As crazy as this sounds, maybe a little oral sex will do the trick and bring her out of the coma."
    The husband was skeptical, but they assured him that they'd close the curtains for privacy. The husband finally agreed and went into his wife's room.
    After a few minutes the woman's monitor flat lined, no pulse, no heart rate. The nurses run back into the room. "What happened!?" they cried. The husband said, "I'm not sure - I think maybe she choked."
     
  20. The Village Idiot

    The Village Idiot
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    Porn Worthy, Bitches

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    Those socks are the tits. Seriously. If you have to do a lot of standing, they are great. No punch line coming, they're just really good.
     
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