Adult Content Warning

This community may contain adult content that is not suitable for minors. By closing this dialog box or continuing to navigate this site, you certify that you are 18 years of age and consent to view adult content.

Holiday Drunk Thread

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Nom Chompsky, Dec 6, 2013.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. Parker

    Parker
    Expand Collapse
    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    90
    Joined:
    Jan 18, 2010
    Messages:
    5,831
    Location:
    Chicago, IL
    Its funny that this comes up and now I heard a commercial (on a podcast or something) for One Wipe Charlies. Dollar Shave Club is selling adult moistened ass wipes. This is a thing now. Here is the video, because its actually kinda funny.

     
    #1721 Parker, Dec 27, 2013
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 27, 2015
  2. Trakiel

    Trakiel
    Expand Collapse
    Call me Caitlyn. Got any cake?

    Reputation:
    245
    Joined:
    Nov 3, 2009
    Messages:
    3,167
    Location:
    St. Paul, MN
    Nah, Parker's black, so he'd feel comfortably unwelcome here.

    Then again, he's educated, so your point may still stand. It really would depend on how high he rated on the blackness scale.
     
  3. Parker

    Parker
    Expand Collapse
    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    90
    Joined:
    Jan 18, 2010
    Messages:
    5,831
    Location:
    Chicago, IL
    Hey he was talking to Crown Royal. I have no problem with really nice white people. They actually like me. "Oh honey, children, look! A non-threatening, non-presidential, black person! Oops, I hope he's okay with me calling him black and not African-American! Do we have any watermelon to offer him? Look, here, you can have my chubby daughter, we know you like them!"

    For the record whiteys, I don't buy this African-American shit. I wasn't born in Africa, I don't know any family members from Africa. Fuck that noise. And for the record, most Africans don't even like their dark American counterparts. And seriously if fucking Durbanite's white ass moved to America and became a citizen, he'd be African-American, how does that make sense?
     
  4. Trakiel

    Trakiel
    Expand Collapse
    Call me Caitlyn. Got any cake?

    Reputation:
    245
    Joined:
    Nov 3, 2009
    Messages:
    3,167
    Location:
    St. Paul, MN
    Ah shit, that's what I get for skimming the thread.
     
  5. Juice

    Juice
    Expand Collapse
    Moderately Gender Fluid

    Reputation:
    1,452
    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2009
    Messages:
    13,970
    Location:
    Boston
    Quiet Trayvon, some of us have jobs.
     
  6. Parker

    Parker
    Expand Collapse
    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    90
    Joined:
    Jan 18, 2010
    Messages:
    5,831
    Location:
    Chicago, IL
    Double post somehow.
     
  7. Parker

    Parker
    Expand Collapse
    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    90
    Joined:
    Jan 18, 2010
    Messages:
    5,831
    Location:
    Chicago, IL
    I could be offended at this, but I'm more upset that my thought process was "Hey, fuck you, I have a job. Shit, I'm at that job. WHY THE FUCK AM I AT WORK?!?!? This is bullshit."

    I don't have a boss that sucks as much as Kubla, but my boss fucking sucks. Dude is a spaz, and wants to be the shopper marketing version of Steve Jobs. Also, no fear of my company recording any of this, they're too cheap to do that. The only goddamn agency that is open from the 24th to the 2nd. Completely and utter bullshit. I can barely contain my contempt for this place.
     
  8. toddamus

    toddamus
    Expand Collapse
    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    396
    Joined:
    Oct 21, 2009
    Messages:
    5,312
    Location:
    Somewhere west of New York
    Somewhere there's an old bastard reading that thinking, "They pay you to work, not to fuck around at home". Remember, people are machines, and machines never take a vacation.

    [​IMG]
     
  9. Parker

    Parker
    Expand Collapse
    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    90
    Joined:
    Jan 18, 2010
    Messages:
    5,831
    Location:
    Chicago, IL
    The whole point of me going into advertising is so I wouldn't have to work over holiday breaks because my clients wouldn't be either! They're not now, so why the fuck am I in the office? Oh right, this company is disorganized as fuck, led by a dude who doesn't cover all his bases, and I have to do basic shit that should have been established the first year of the company opening.

    Yet there are things like this being made in the world that make me laugh.
    <a class="postlink" href="https://www.behance.net/gallery/Rio/13376813" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;">https://www.behance.net/gallery/Rio/13376813</a>
    <a class="postlink" href="http://www.askmen.com/dating/love_tip/a-kunyara-primer.html" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;">http://www.askmen.com/dating/love_tip/a ... rimer.html</a>
     
    #1729 Parker, Dec 27, 2013
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 27, 2015
  10. ghettoastronaut

    ghettoastronaut
    Expand Collapse
    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    70
    Joined:
    Oct 22, 2009
    Messages:
    4,917
    Say what you will about gentleman-Americans of African descent bitching about their jobs, at least it's better than white people's existential angst about theirs.
     
  11. Flat_Rate

    Flat_Rate
    Expand Collapse
    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    132
    Joined:
    Apr 26, 2010
    Messages:
    2,494
    I gotta work my normal shift next Tuesday ( 1 PM to 1130 ) t

    I have to work my regular shift on New Years Eve, 1 to 1130, then turn around and be back in at 6 am Wednesday.

    Happy fucking new year.
     
  12. happyfunball

    happyfunball
    Expand Collapse
    overly defenCive stuffed cougar

    Reputation:
    46
    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2009
    Messages:
    2,113
    Re: I gotta work my normal shift next Tuesday ( 1 PM to 1130 ) t

    Thanks! We're going to a friend's house where I believe I committed to playing beer pong with friend against our other friend and his partner, who's a crotchety fart who has labeled his coworkers "cunty McCunterson", "fat moley bitch" and "Amish fag". I hope we win as I imagine he will get really nasty then.

    Wait, you were being sarcastic, weren't you?
     
  13. Parker

    Parker
    Expand Collapse
    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    90
    Joined:
    Jan 18, 2010
    Messages:
    5,831
    Location:
    Chicago, IL
    Re: I gotta work my normal shift next Tuesday ( 1 PM to 1130 ) t

    You're friends with Ballsack?
     
  14. katokoch

    katokoch
    Expand Collapse
    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    477
    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2009
    Messages:
    4,631
    Location:
    Minneapolis
    Step One:
    [​IMG]
    Step Two: ?????

    Step Three: Profit!

    I didn't see any Jew references there...
     
  15. iczorro

    iczorro
    Expand Collapse
    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    107
    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2009
    Messages:
    3,541
    Location:
    The Island
    I think it was supposed to be "Fat Moley Bitch-stein"
     
  16. The Village Idiot

    The Village Idiot
    Expand Collapse
    Porn Worthy, Bitches

    Reputation:
    274
    Joined:
    Nov 23, 2009
    Messages:
    3,267
    Location:
    Where angels never dare
    Professional Pet Sitter Tip #3,267:

    If you have a cat that gets angry that you go away, make sure to not leave your suede Ugg boots somewhere that they can pee on.
     
  17. katokoch

    katokoch
    Expand Collapse
    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    477
    Joined:
    Oct 19, 2009
    Messages:
    4,631
    Location:
    Minneapolis
    Better, more 'Sack-y.
     
  18. happyfunball

    happyfunball
    Expand Collapse
    overly defenCive stuffed cougar

    Reputation:
    46
    Joined:
    Nov 6, 2009
    Messages:
    2,113
    Re: I gotta work my normal shift next Tuesday ( 1 PM to 1130 ) t

    If Sack is a gay man from Las Vegas, then...I think I just might be.
     
  19. Parker

    Parker
    Expand Collapse
    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    90
    Joined:
    Jan 18, 2010
    Messages:
    5,831
    Location:
    Chicago, IL
    Re: I gotta work my normal shift next Tuesday ( 1 PM to 1130 ) t

    There is a joke here but I can't exactly pinpoint it.
     
  20. JoeCanada

    JoeCanada
    Expand Collapse
    Emotionally Jaded

    Reputation:
    79
    Joined:
    Oct 20, 2009
    Messages:
    1,373
    Location:
    Edmonton, AB
    I've been playing Grand Theft Auto for the last two days, this woodpecker picked the wrong house to fuck with.
     
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.