My mom is taking me out to brunch for Mother's Day. Hey she's fed me as a child growing up, might as well let her do what she loves today!
I remember a time not so long ago when I had respect for Sean-a-Paul. Seriously? Simple Fucking Plan? You did a teamup with Simple Fucking Plan? Sean-a-Paul, you are so dead to me. Doing a barbecue dinner for mom tonight. Ribs, burgers, corn on the cob and garden salad, to be finished off with those chocolate peanut butter cupcakes. Aw yeah.
I have a couple of those, but they always leak. The screw on top never aligns just right and then I stand up after having my purse on my lap and my wallet and iPod are soaked and I have a huge wet spot on the crotch of my shorts. If you have a non-screw-top aluminum water bottle to recommend, please do. I drink a million gallons of water a day in the summer. Sorry, most boring Drunk Thread slash any time topic. Here's something cute:
I can't believe they had to stop the car so that I could puke. We were so close to making it home, too.
I'm assuming you have Siggs? I had trouble with those lids too. I use Klean Kanttens now, they're not as easy to drink out of as Siggs, but much better than Nalgenes and the cap seals well every time. Additional benefit is that it's all stainless steel and they don't have whatever the hell that inner lining in a Sigg is, so they wash out perfectly and don't leave residual flavor from booze and/or soap. Plus, style points.
Thank you. In other news, how did the term "Toss salad" come to mean what it can mean? The act of tossing salad, sexually, has absolutely nothing in common with tossing salad, normally.
Apparently the term originated in prisons, where inmates would coerce peers of lower standing to lick their assholes. The lower inmates would mask the taste by taking salad dressing from their meals and keeping it on their tongues as they performed the task. Hence, "tossing salad". I laughed really hard writing that. The internet ruins everything for me.
With jelly or without jelly. Some people use syrup. I had no idea that "most all gays" like guys to suck their ass. Toss my salad, let him eat me and we straight! As for Girls, I've seen good reviews of in a number of sources and finally dove in last night. I laughed like a maniac but also had some genuine WTF moments. The woodworking,weightlifting hook-up who began to describe his partner as an eleven year old junkie with a cabbage patch lunchbox before finishing on her, for example. I will confess to watching Sex in The City heavily from ages 12-15 and remember one of girls hooking up with a guy who had a similar pre-orgasm outburst of insults and it brings me to wonder - anybody here have a similar experience. By this I mean true insults and deviant shit as described above. Everyone has at least once said something cringe-worthy in bed except for prudes and mormons and such.
Oh and the Euro girl's cousin Shoshana(?) is a fucking riot. I was watching on my laptop smoking a joint in the nude when my laughter brought the girlfriend in to investigate. When Shoshanna revealed that her baggage, from low to high severity, included irritable bowel syndrome, not loving her grandmother whatsoever, and being a virgin at 21 I just lost it and revealed myself as a giant pussy. Today the girlfriend has mercilessly teased me about this offering a pedi/mani date and to watch all the reality tv I want. Fuck her, I know I'll be taking my Sex in the City knowledge to the grave.
You're welcome. <a class="postlink" href="http://suicidegirls.com/girls/Missy/albums/site/25866/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;">http://suicidegirls.com/girls/Missy/albums/site/25866/</a>
And I'm moving up in the world. Just won a tournament with 159 entrants. Made $460, so not huge money, but not bad for a $12 investment. I think I'll need to make a run to the liquor store later to celebrate. Kampf is getting his skill back kiddos. Oh yeah. Are we still talking about hot old women? Not sure if Sharon Stone has been mentioned. She's 54, but this picture is 7 years old. Too lazy to find the most recent. Edit: I have no idea why that's showing up twice. --- whatever
Odd. My post disappeared . . . I'll try again. Speaking of wider mouthed drinking - new Miller Lite punch top can. Thoughts? "Drink responsibly." Or, you know, shotgun them with the built in carburetor.
WHOA! I hate Miller Light, but I'm gonna buy some just so I can try that. EDIT: Just got back from the store, and they didn't have them yet. However, I had a weird little minute with this guy who works for my dad. My dad is really well know and well liked around here, and it's common for people to bring us food/beer/etc. When I was at the store, one of his employees was there, drunk. He came over to me and shook my hand, then pulled me in for a hug... Okay, there's nothing wrong with a man-hug... But he was holding on way too long! He was just there babbling to me in spanish. Then he put his arm around me (By "around me," I mean my waist. He's only about 5 feet tall) and went around the store telling everyone in Spanish that I was his son by other parents. He insisted on paying for my beer, and he had his arm around me the whole time. Creeped out doesn't even begin to describe how I felt. I feel dirty. (The bad kind of dirty)
Im surprised Coors light didn't come up with this, they are the king of can gimmicks. But their vented can mouth thing sucks. Coors light is still my go to party beer.
I was interviewed for a video podcast today but I immediately forgot the name of it and I'm so sad. This was just on my newsfeed:
Is anybody watching Sherlock on PBS? I'm not about to start a discussion on it, really, but it is a fantastic piece of TV. Just watched the first episode of season 2. It's a mix of the Downey movies and a more modern take of the classic character. I have not been this rapt by a program since I started watching House. This is a huge compliment because I get either frustrated or bored halfway through an episode of anything. It is the only serial I am involved in. Tonight they're doing "Hound of The Baskervilles." Cumberpatch is my new hero. Why are the best actors always Brits? Must be something in the water that causes exceptional snootiness.