Patron is the most over-rated tequila there is. You could feed shots of Jose to just about anyone and tell them it's Patron, and they'll fall for it. I'm not saying I dislike Patron by any means, but I'd rather save my money and drink Jose. I'm not feeling quite as thrifty this weekend: And keeping up with the theme: Spoiler
Broken link from before (apologies): NSFW Patron is overrated "Hey look at me" designer tequila. It probably wouldn't even beat Cuervo in a blind taste test. As far as tequila goes, it was the very first alcohol I ever got drunk off of (Sauza assured that I was a magical asshole that night) so I spare a special bond with it despite the fact that many-a-time it has scorched the inside of my body like the airshaft fireball from Judge Dredd. My recent favourite came thanks to a sweet deal at the Duty Free shop in Port Huron: ...it's good stuff. Smooth, with a buzz that will make you climb walls faster than the Speed Of Fear. Worst tequila in the world by far: ...I loved her in Pumpkinhead. Pardon me whilst I throw up into my hands.
I'm partial to Corralejo. Real smooth, good flavor. $26 down here. Tastes just as good as Cabo and several bucks cheaper. Not fond of shooting tequila, but I'll search out a well made margarita. I use a fresh lime and a teaspoon of agave syrup in mine. Takes the bite off the lime without making it cloying. My first liquor drunk was on Cuervo. That shit is prison rape. I must have vomited 6 different times until dawn. My insides were on fire, there was a chunk of hotdog stuck in my nose, and the room was spinning fast as shit. I've had better nights drinking bathtub gin. Tonight is absinthe night. Got some Lucid left. "They're the Assfuck Twins. Why would you call them The Naughty Twins when they get fucked in the ass all the time? " NSFW Obligatory: NSFW
All I have to say now is fuck tequila for the moment. I went through 10 bottles over the past week + and am glad to be back where there is whiskey. MMMMM bourbon.
Shots are a waste of even mid-range tequilas. Cuervo is fine for margaritas, but anything better should be over rocks, with a lime twist, maybe a splash of club soda. If you're shooting tequila, it had better be off of or out of something attached to an attractive woman.
Stuck in Utah for the next 4-5 days. Pros- Every woman is blonde. I have a 12 pack of Budweiser with nothing to do. Cons- The salt lake is a shithole full of horse flies, monster mosquitoes, and maybe two boat docks. And that's considered SLC's major attraction. I suppose I could go gawk at the Mormon Temple, but that'll cover half a day and I'm back to drinking my sins away.
Ah, payday. In lieu of my typical case of Natty Ice, I opted for some finer beers. I have not yet lost my resentment towards el jugo del diablo. Sorry fellas, but I'd rather drop some money on a pile of beer or a good scotch or bourbon. Brau Bros. Scotch Ale (peat smoked malt!) and Cream Stout, Schell Hopfenmalz, and a Boulevard Dark Truth Stout- I sampled some of this beast at the liquor store (I love Surdyk's) and it is a very complex and inky dark stout. Good stuff.
The general progression of Lethal Weapon 3 has gone like this: Worst James Bond credit scene ripoff ever -> Best action scene guitar riffs ever
I mean Ontario. Come to think of it there are more than those three brands (Jim Beam and Wild Turkey come to mind) but as a general rule the LCBO is crap for selection of anything exotic, although their beer selection has improved by leaps and bounds in the last few years. I mean, if you go to any American source of wine reviews (winelibrarytv.com, for example) you won't find half of the bottles they review are even carried by the store, let alone available at your local franchise. Hell, I went into an SAQ Signature in Montreal the other week (read: liquor stores that carry 10L, $2500 bottles of champagne on the shelves) and I doubt there were more than 3 brands of bourbon in the entire store. I also have to ask the obvious - what kind of seriously fucked up shit has to happen that a pair of twins will do porn together? It's like the Perfect Storm of issues coalesces onto two people such that they agree to market their bodies together. Christ.
I hate to break up everyone tequila talk but... Scotch, scotch scotch. I love scotch. Can't get drunk though. Gotta wake up early and wait in line at the DMV. Last thing I needs is a hangover to make that shit even more unbearable.
My sisters are twins. No they do not do porn. My apologies to those here who are a twin, but in my personal experience, they will appear perfectly normal on the outside and batshit crazy on the inside. It's like all of the common sense, emotional stability, and self-control that a person would normally possess got split up between two people.
No, you silly bastards, the shots I put up earlier were not goddamn kiddie porn. It's the Milton Twins. Google 'em. They don't ever touch each other in a sexual way, unfortunately. Even when they're using strap ons on each other. And I suppose this post will be used as further proof in that one dude's theory that I'm the horniest man on this board. If you saw my rant and rave last night, I think this whole Job-going-away situation is gonna give me a fucking ulcer. It's been a difficult year, financially, and I'm really not in a place where I can go on unemployment for any amount of time. Which is why I got fall down drunk last night.
I am fucking lit and have quite a bit o' the alcohol in me. Already got laid once. Might go for twice. Hot little black female friend is on here way over with friends. Never fucked a black chick yet. Result to follow! / (I'm not gonna remember posting this...)
So no black girl after all. I'm a sad panda. .. Breaking Bad season 3 is a fucking roller coaster. 5 episodes in, and I'm emotionally spent. What the cunt?
I wanna green you for being such an adorable drunk. But I can't. Everyone tells me how good Breaking Bad is. Is it on Netflix? Is it gonna be a Dexter-like moment where I say, "Holy shit. Why haven't I been watching this?"
Don't you just want to put him in your purse and take him with you? Not that I have a purse... DON'T JUDGE ME! It really sucks being rejected by every girl you've ever talked to. Sometimes I wonder why I even try.