I wish I was a little bit taller, wish I was a baller

I have a gigantic nose and weak chin. Godawful teeth too (thanks Dad!). I used to be pretty insecure about my appearance- especially in my teens, but I care much less today. My blonde hair is also pretty thin already and unless neck beards and wispy moustaches count I can't really grow facial hair, so I'm screwed out of having decent hair.

Alt-Focus: Nothing. I got lucky body-wise.

 

Focus: I am 6'4'' 230 lbs. I struggled with my weight from the time I was a kid all the way through high school. My peak weight was 275 lbs when I graduated high school, and my lowest weight was about 168 when I was 24 (3 years ago). I wish I was the type of person who could eat what they want and not gain weight. I also wish that I could not get cravings for junk food. My body fat percentage is fairly high, I think around 25 %, so that's another thing I need to work on.

I wear glasses, too. I was never able to get contacts into my eyes and gave up on them.

Also, my hair. I had thick hair up until about 5 years ago, then out of nowhere I started to go bald. My head is mostly still covered with hair but it is not as thick as it used to be, especially on the top. I always thought that I would be like my dad and have a full head of hair well into my 50s. But now in that regard I have gone the same route as the men on my mom's side of the family.

Alt-Focus: I guess the best part of my body is my teeth. I got my first cavity at 20, and to date it is my only cavity. I like being tall, too.

 

The gap between my big toe and other toes is huge. This helps for barefoot running, but looks freakish. I'm not fat right now but I definitely dislike my ability to rapidly put it on with a relatively minor slip up in my diet.

But that's pretty much it, all in all things could be worse.

 

I'm female, so I have a love-hate relationship with basically every single part of my body. But I hate the typically female pasttime of sitting around and talking about how much you hate your body, so I'll mostly focus on the alt-focus.

My most consistently favorite thing is my hair. It's the best. It's thick and curly and interesting and has this cool natural highlighting because my dad has black hair and my mom had red hair. I have a few gray hairs already, but I kind of like them. Whenever I go to a salon everyone gathers round to admire it. It's the only thing I'll splurge on when it comes to buying pretty-making shit. The downside is that it's a lot of work, and not everyone knows how to deal with it so I've gotten a few either disappointing or bad haircuts in my life.

I never bothered to notice my eyebrows, but people will ask me if I just had them done and where I get my eyebrows done and all that and I get to say "Oh, they're just naturally perfect" because I've never so much as tweezed a stray hair in my life. So that's cool.

I also really like my eyes and my lips, both of which are big. But big lips are hard to hold up, so I always look like I'm frowning or pouting.

I mostly like my boobs and butt/hips. But with my boobs I don't like fitting them into clothes or how my shoulders are always slumped and in pain because of them. Speaking of clothes, I apparently have very strange proportions that aren't supposed to exist. I think it's mostly because I'm very short/high-waisted. Other than that, I feel pretty normal, but it is always a struggle trying on clothes. I have SIX sizes of clothing in my wardrobe. It's really annoying. I think that is my biggest overall gripe about my physical shortcomings.

I don't think much about my feet - especially during sandal months when they are always fucking disgustingly dirty - but I always get compliments on them so I like them. I also really like my flexibility. But, I'm not very strong. I'm working on that.

 

Please, I am perfect. I am 5'10'', long legged blue eyed blonde. But that's not all it's cracked up to be either. A surprising number of people just seems to equate blonde with dumb/easy, and it gets old very quickly.

I have man leg hair. Like, full on MAN HAIR, my dad and I have the same leg shape and level of legforest. It's not blonde and fine, it's dark brown, thick and long. I wax and shave the crap out of it and curse the world.

A thing that seems to bother other people more than me is my somewhat oddly shaped nose. It's long and skinny, but I guess the cartilage is shorter than my actual nose, or there is a part missing - so when I smile, the bottom part of my nose sags. It's especially noticeable from the side. I think it's kind of funny, but my sister would get under the first scalpel if she had my nose.

I also have feet that look like Charcot Marie feet. It cracks me up, especially when my friends see them for the first time. I just wish they didn't hurt sometimes.

Alt-focus: I have beautiful hands. Long, skinny fingers, and amazing nails - I never needed fake nails, my own are healthy, shiny and strong, and they do not break (although, anything longer than 1/4 inch always felt impractical). Too bad in my work we are not allowed long nails or any kind of nail polish.

Overall, I'm pretty happy, got a reasonably good head on my shoulders, 2 arms, 2 crooked hairy legs, a pair of small boobs, and cellulite on my ass like any normal woman.

 

Recent weight gains notwithstanding, the one feature I've always wanted to change was my freckles. I was only occasionally mocked for them as child, but as you all know, that shit sticks with you. I don't just have a fetching sprinkling across the bridge of my nose and cheekbones, or a few dark freckles here and there.

I've got a lot of freckles. A LOT of freckles. I don't have red hair, I tan a little (thanks to some guinea blood) and the ones on my face have faded over time, so they aren't as stark as they once were. But it would have been nice if they weren't such a prominent feature.

 

I have a very long torso and short legs. Although this is nice because my weight is much more proportioned for someone of my height (5'10"), buying clothes is always tricky. Apparently 28/29 length in pants is not all too common in any sizes bigger than 32. It also doesn't help that my right leg is about a quarter inch shorter than my left.

My feet are kind of weird. They aren't misshapen and hobbit like, but they curve out on the outside and after a month or three my shoes start getting this crescent moon look to them. I have a pair of shoes that are about 5 years old that are shaped like a boomerang.

I've been lucky enough to be blessed with wildly curly, salt and pepper hair and a very attractive face. Piercing eyes with long lashes, dimples, straight white teeth, permanent 5 o'clock shadow. It's going to be a tragic day when my face starts to age.

 

My hair is shitty. It's curly, but not overly curly, just enough so that it looks shitty if I grow it. Also I cannot grow decent facial hair for the life of my, but the rest of my body seems to have no trouble. The chest hair I don't mind, but back and shoulders is a tad too far. What's weird is I didn't get the extra hair this bad till a couple years into my 20's.
My skin is also shitty and dry, prone to flaking. The only upside from that is I had virtually no pimples or acne as a teen.
I'm 5'10" but I don't care about that, I was short as a kid, so being on the low side of average is no biggy. I'm overweight, and it doesn't bother me too much except for my second chin. If I toned it more, my jawline is decent. Beyond that, my looks could be construed as ok if I carry myself confidently and happily.

Moving away from the physical, I just wish I could concentrate better. I like a lot about having ADD (not hyperactive at all), it's a hell of a lot of fun, but it's so easy to slip into bad habits of lax discipline. To be honest the last time I had discipline was when I was on meds, 13-17, and even then only intermittently.
I don't want to cop out and say I can't do anything without some sort of outside help, but the more I try, the more I find that I can not even fake an interest in anything outside of my own passions. I don't mean to try and excuse not doing anyting that isn't fun, but I drop the ball on the simplest shit because I barely give crap, even though it could affect me severely.
Normally, when I'm not shy I'm sociable, fun, goofy and not quite with it, but almost. On meds I'm boring and become locked into the esoteric. It's a rock and a hard place, and I'm realising that as fun as the rock is, I'm going to have to go back to the hard place.

(NB: I'm making sure the ladyfriend and the kid are taken care of, don't get me wrong. But to get into the career I'm realising I have to be in, there's no clear path, just a lot of bullshit ones that I'd suck at...)

 

I wish my hands were slightly bigger with more elegant fingers, and my feet were a size 6 so I could buy really cute shoes on sale easier.

Other than that, I love everything about me. I lucked out and got facial features that fit together, my eyes are a cool shade of brown that is either green or gold depending on the light, my hair is glossy and wavy on its own, I appreciate my butt, if my boobs were any bigger I couldn't enjoy archery, and I rather enjoy being on the smaller end of the height spectrum because I can always jump up onto surfaces to grab what I can't reach, but it's hard to make yourself small enough to be able to curl up in a plane seat and take a nap.

My favorite thing about myself is that I'm freakishly strong for a small person who doesn't lift any weights. It makes a great party trick when a 5'4" girl has other women leap into her arms and then spins them around all movie-style. Plus it's fun and a good workout when I'm drunk!

 

That is my favorite thing I have read today.

I'm 6', 180. I am as average-looking as can be, nothing oddly-proportioned or quickly-noticed. Anything I would "fix" about my appearance has nothing to do with genetics, but just requires me to put time in at the gym. I'm old though, and wish I had better knees. I love to jog and still do regularly, but I've got some bad cartilage and arthritis that's starting to get to me.

 

I'm bow-legged, and I have Osgood Schlatter in both knees. From an appearance standpoint, you'd never really notice until I sat down, at which point my knee has a prominent protruding bump. On the physical side, though, it causes me a lot of lower back problems (sacroiliac pain) so I have to keep that in check with various exercises from time to time. I've also got very skinny fingers.

The only physical feature that creates a clothing hassle is the size of my neck, which is 17". Shirts with that neck size are normally for guys who have a much larger chest, so shopping for dress shirts I need to wear a tie with results in me trying to tuck a circus tent into my pants. Thankfully, most companies have a "slim fit" line now which takes care of this problem. Since I don't wear a tie to work and can leave the top button undone, I normally buy shirts with a 15.5" neck so I've got a bigger selection and they cost a little less.

Other than that, I'm pretty happy with how I look. If you asked me a few years ago I would've given a different answer, but I think I've matured in that regard. I'm 5'9" and I fluctuate between 160-165lbs. I used to hate my receding hairline, but I've come to accept it, and looking back on pictures from a few years ago, I actually think I look better now.

 

When I was 8 and people asked me what I wanted to be when I grew up, I told them I wanted to be 5'4". Unfortunately, I never made it there, and now my boyfriend hides things from me on high shelves/tall cupboards/on top of the fridge. I also wish my hair wasn't so fine, because it's kind of humiliating and awkward when people pet your head and tell you your hair is soft like baby hair.

I lucked out in the eyelash and eyebrow lotteries, though, and I've never bought mascara or plucked my eyebrows. I think in time I will learn to love my babyface, too, when all my friends look old and haggard and I look significantly less old and haggard. I'm 23 and people still accuse me of using my older sister's ID at bars/liquor stores sometimes.

 

I wish all my toes except the big ones were webbed. I also wish my lungs and heart were about 30% bigger. Also that my muscle tissue and testosterone levels were denser and higher, respectively. Not because any of those things are currently deficient, but because I would like to be a superhero.

Other than that, i'm actually super handsome.


Edit: I would also lose the toe nails. Toe nails are fucking disgusting and stupid. I'm kind of weird about feet.

 

I hate my eyebrows. They are the only part of my anatomy that I can't keep under control. I can pluck and wax all I want, but I will never be satisfied with how they look. I'm aware that this is ridiculous. I have male and female friends who tell me there is nothing wrong with my eyebrows, but I obsess over them. If i pluck them every time I get annoyed, I end up with nothing left. If I leave them alone, they get overgrown and I feel the need to pull them out of my head every time I look in the mirror. On some level, I've accepted that I will never like them, but I'm constantly striving to be comfortable with them.

 

In general, I'm happy with my body. I'm 5'9 and very muscular for my height. I weigh 180 and look like I'm 160. Sure, I'd like to be taller, it'd help out playing hockey. Other than that I wish my stomach was a bit more stout. When I get nervous my stomach goes haywire. Nothing is as awkward as when you're on a date and you got gi issues.

 

PROS: 6'2" with an athletic build that allows me to eat like complete shit, stay just a little active and not blow up like a blimp. (pics in the TiBer thread) Pretty broad shoulders, small feet for my height (size 10) no chest/back/ass hair. But where I get compliments most is with my eyes. They are very blue with a dark gray ring around the iris. And my feet. Apparently I have nice feet.

CONS: Eyes are a little close set, nose is a little too big, hair line is a little to high but doesn't seem to be receding, due to my diet I'll never have a six-pack, hair is kinky like a copper brush if its longer than an a few inches, crooked teeth, no ass, no beard and a normal, white guy sized wang but I have been told it "looks perfect" so I'm going with quality over quantity.

 

I wish my penis was less adorable and more terrifying.

 

You should paint it black.

 

Have you ever felt so bad about yourself that you got a saline bagel injected into your forehead?


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Focus: I used to hate my wrists. They are ridiculously thin. Comically tiny. My forearms are normal, but they taper down to these sticks. I got 3 things from my mom's genes. Thin wrists, oily skin, and a less than manly chin. Thanks, mom, I look like a Picasso. Gangly and goofy is no way to go through middle school. That shit was brutal. It didn't help that my mom insisted on washing my pants in scalding water so they all shrunk up to highwaters. When she gets tossed in the home, then we'll be even.

I'm content with my body. Couple issues, physically, but I know I lucked out on the genetic lottery and my children will be Adonises with chiseled features hearkening back to the sculptures of classic antiquity.

Most of my problems are internal. When we have the "Decrepit Monkey Skeleton Thread" in about 10 years, I'll fill that sucker up.