IIIII'M Pickin'-Out-A-Drunk-Thread, FOR YOU! 8/5/11

My eyes are crossed.

 

Sex that good?

 

Beer.

 

I think I'm too drunk to cum.


And that's really fucking dunrk fr me

 

All the whores working the beer booths liked my nails. But my husband thinks they look white trash.

 

Sometimes it's fun to be a little trashy. Rock the ghetto nail!

 

I don't mind. Trashy or not, the nails are cute.

 

So, if you have to ask what white trash nails look like, does that mean you are likely white trash?

 

I think I'd have to go liquor. You know how assholes are with wine? That's me with beer. I could talk about beer (and specifically beer pairings) for hours. But liquor, it's just damn versatile.

Try to smuggle in beer in a water bottle to an inappropriate setting (like church). Try to drink beer when you've had a killer meal and you are just-too-fuckin'-full. Try to drink beer in as a dessert. Try to drink it as a breakfast drink (though this is debatable). Try to dilute it.

True, after a long day of working in the yard, nothing tastes as good as a nice pale ale, but a vodka club is pretty damn close.

If I was stuck with one, I'd have to go liquor.

Specifically, gin. Though vodka would be second, with tequila close behind.

 

hooker, after considering all the evidence....I mean this in the nicest way possible (which admittedly may not seem very nice at all), since I'm sure you care dearly for him....



It seems like your husband is a fucking boring buzzkill.

 

I have been thinking the same thing for weeks but didn't want to be the one to say it.

 

I am renown worldwide for my sense of tact.

 

I think I'd pick wine, the only major thing I see wrong with this scenario is that backbacking trips would become a sober experience, too much weight to carry that long unless we have a base camp, scotch is the only suitable drink for backpacking with new locations for each campsite.

Edit: if you add the stipulation that you can't even cook with the other types of alcohol this becomes a no brainer.

Nom, how did you like Fenway Paahk?

 

It's nicer than Yankee Stadium, even though it feels really small. I had a sausage outside that was pretty disappointing though.

 

I would pick wine too, simply because I am the picture of classiness, but I feel like I need to argue on this.

Beer you can use for lots of cooking, it is good in stews, in barbeques, in chili, etc.
Booze can also be used. Vodka pasta sauces, whiskey for smoking/grilling/glazing. Tequila when paired with lime is awesome for marinades and sauces. I am sure there are many more examples but off the top of my head.....

 

I'm considering him to be more of a tempering influence; otherwise we all know that hooker's time on this planet would end far too soon and in a trashy, drunken, sunburnt, boob-filled blaze of glory.

...actually, I've decided that's how I plan to leave this planet as well. Hooker, teach me?

 

And what would be wrong with that? Sheiiiiiit, who doesn't want to go down in a blaze of boobies?

 

I would have listened to more Bon Jovi if that was the line in the song.

In other news, hi. Fuckers.

 

Yeah, after that I stared at the computer for about an hour before passing out.
Oh well, I can join now instead of studying for my LSAT. Seems like a good idea.

And to the what drink would you choose discussion, would have to go with liquor. You can mix it if you want to take it slower, but if you want/need to get drunk quickly, it's much easier to do it with liquor than anything else.