And now to combine two unrelated sentences: Yeah, when are they going to start the 'dead babies in commercials are funny' craze?
I'd take talking babies--hell, rapping babies--over that dogshit Kayak commercial with the douche bag dancing in the hotel lobby with his twat wife. I don't know why it makes me so irrationally angry, but those 30 seconds of television are completely intolerable. Every time I see the commerical, I secretly hope that it'll be like those GE refrigerator spots where it looks like a movie trailer until the person smashes into a stainless steel side-by-side. Except I want it to be a commercial for GE locomotives, featuring how they're strong enough to plow through a hotel and keep on going.
Why all the enmity, all this snark? Can we please remember what brought us together? Drinking and graphic nudity. NSFW Instead of anything classy you get a woman getting a fuck-swirlie from a dumpy guy. MErry Christmas, bitches. Since it's my day off I'm barbecuing and drinking gin. Picked up a smoked beer for dinner too, from Aecht. Smoked Marzen style. Haven't had these guys in a long, long time. She's beautiful. My first born won't look that wonderful.
You know shit just got real when you have to pick up the jumperoo and put it in the hallway so that the toddler will stop climbing up into it and getting stuck. Then the toddler, of course, starts dragging all the books from the bookshelf that was behind the jumperoo and tossing them onto the furniture. That's when you have to move her toy organizer in front of the bookshelf to deter her. It's days like today that I'm seriously wondering what we were thinking getting pregnant again. Everybody have a drink for me tonight and let's hope tomorrow is a good day.
At the risk of getting carried away - I fucking love that beer. It is a manly beer, redolent of burning logs, the great outdoors, and the smokehouse out behind pappy's woodshed. It's like vacation in a bottle. One sip and I'm miles away from civilization, a roaring fire in front of me and the stars overhead. It tastes like bacon and a campfire made sweet love in your mouth. Without the resulting third degree burns. I fucking love that beer.
Dear Diary, Today, the internet taught me the phrase fuck-swirlie. Then, I wondered if the participants in CJ's gif had a fetish or were trying to be funny. R-o-M
You got halfway through that post and came, didn't you? On another note, if someone posts before you do as you're writing yours, and it shows you what they wrote before you post your response, any NSFW tags no longer function--meaning that in the preview window above your text, there's a guy pounding a chick with her head in the toilet. Real great for the office.
So far my wife and I have gated off between the dinning room/living room and the hallway. We also move her toy chest in front of the other hallway to keep her out. We take the cushions off the couch to keep her from crawling under the end tables (where she ALWAYS bumps her head and then cries) and to keep her from grabbing the cords behind the entertainment center, because cords are her FAVORITE. Every day it looks like a fucking tornado went through Toys'R'Us and dropped all the shit in our house, and every night once she goes to bed, we clean it all up so that we can do it again the next day. Mind you, she barely plays with ANY of her toys. She'd rather try to find a way, any way, to get over the gates or behind the cushions to the places she knows she shouldn't go to. To top it all off, she now knows how to stand (and almost walk), but she hasn't figured out how to get back down. So she'll pull herself up in her crib when she is supposed to be napping, but she can't figure out how to sit down, so she just screams for us until we come in and get her. She has literally stood there and screamed for two hours while we waited for her to just fall down and fall asleep. We finally gave in and went in and put her down, and she immediately went out. So no, I'm not looking forward to our next kid. Maybe in a couple of years I'll look forward to it, but I'm doubtful.
Re: Re: Is It Friday? Drink Posting Meeting Place. Fuck that, few sips of beer and some nyquil and that kid will be down for a solid 6 hours.
Been there. She has deleted the background on my PS3 multiple times. I have no idea how she does it. It's driving me nuts. Edit: have you tried Dora the Explorer? We play 1 episode for her a day, and she LOVES it. 2 episodes if she is having an especially bad day.
She really doesn't care if about the tv, other than trying to break it apparently. She might watch for a minute then she goes about her business. We don't watch Dora in this house, my niece was obsessed with Dora so I got burnt out on her before I ever had a kid. I would like to report that she's currently playing quietly by herself, so we might survive this day after all.
I just want to let ya'll know that it doesn't get better. My kids are 6 and 7 and still don't play with their toys, well other than covering their bedroom floor with them. I keep telling myself that I should donate them to kids who will appreciate them(the toys, not the boys). On the bright side, my kids don't climb cabinets or walls or chew on cords. The spray bottle of bleach cured that real quick. They do like to leap onto my furniture from other pieces of furniture, despite attempts to halt such shenanigans. They know not to do so in front of me, but every time I leave the room they rush to get some flying time in. And thanks, CJ. Thing Two chose the exact moment I opened that tag to come over and take a peek. He missed the actual concept (since he's only six) and thinks someone thought they had to stick their head into the toilet to puke. Hysterical stuff to his kind. Now I'm in trouble for not showing Thing One the hilarious picture. I need a beer.