I've been nursing a hangover for the majority of the day after a great night out. I have "Gridiron" aka law-prom tonight which is exactly what it sounds like. Absolutely stupid. I'm going to pour myself a white russian, throw on a suit, and watch the drama unfold.
You guys wanna see a picture of a really dirty, filthy hoe? NSFW Spoiler Seriously, you people. It's "ho". This bothers me a lot more than it probably should.
Apologies if this has already been posted... http://www.wral.com/bad-fresh-prince-rap-triggers-pa-lockdown/12172658/ Really?
So I was filling out the stupid long application for a teaching job, with all kinds of "what is important as a teacher?" and "how would you use technology" and "how do you want your students to view you?" I get done and click "next," and of course it says "your session is timed out." All the long, well-thought-out answers I had typed were gone. Then I damn near lost my shit and broke my fucking computer, because fuck.
Lazarus Form Recovery I'm not sure if there is anything similar for Firefox, and I'm too lazy to look. And if you are using IE, I don't want you educating today's students anyway.
You like that one? This'n here from today will give you hemorrhoids. Teen suspended for stopping armed student on bus. School system is a fucking joke. Zero tolerance, folks. Amazingly effective. Remember it is illegal to defend yourself until you're 18. you should probably be white too, just to be safe. But, wait, there's MORE! Another kid suspended for chewing his pop tart into a gun shape, sort of, maybe. They suspended a kid for fucking around with a POP TART. What chafes my anus is the teacher reportedly got "visibly mad." I hope someone sets her on fire. And just for kicks, because we're not fucking with our kids enough, An Indonesian mother kills her son because he had a small penis. Her 9 year old son. THE ARISTOCRATS! That's it, I'm done. Out. These are all just from today.
She could have at least waited another year until he was 10, the age where the penis stops growing. That's when it stopped for everyone else too, right? Nothing like staying home on Saturday night and making self-depricating penis jokes on the internet. High five Misanthropic!
Dear everyone, You are hereby put on notice that, when you are in the presence of two tall people, referring to them as "the twin towers" isn't funny. It's not that it's offensive or tasteless or insensitive, though a good argument could be made that it is all of those things. It's that simply fails to meet the criteria of the word "joke". Sincerely, A tall person
Sorry, I can't hear you from way the fuck down there. I'll be up here, reading shitty magazine articles about the myriad of positive correlations associated with eight.
Let's look at history's important tall people: Abraham Lincoln, Edward I, Peter the Great, Andre the Giant. Now look at history's short people: Napoleon, Tom Cruise, and George Costanza.