This always makes me laugh, unless you workout like shimmered I bet my weakest guy friend would take you to the cleaners in any reasonable test of strength.
For moving bookshelves and bedframes, Frank. I'm not talking hand to hand combat here. I'm sure your friends are all very macho and would make me feel like a delicate flower indeed.
Not always. My sister in law was a pretty athletic girl in H.S. and played softball (coed, mid-life style, but no shimmered style training) and she was wrestling a buddy of mine (granted he's a small guy but in good health, plays basketball all the time etc) and its was dead even.
Oh, that's right, it's always good to have a midget in the middle to support the big stuff, forgot about that.
It's 11 PM local time, and I'm waiting for non emergency police to pop over and escort me into my house. Why? Because I was an idiot and told some creepy solicitor to get off my lawn today because the homeowners (my parents) are out of town. He came back three times before I left for work. Now I'm afraid he's lurking in my bushes or waiting in my living room, in the dark. At least I know where our guns are kept.
Wrestling usually comes down to weight and stamina. As far as moving I hate putting people out for moving my shit. I borrowed a friends truck and only had one of my roommates help move my bed two different times while I moved everything else. The last time I moved I had another friend help me but I had moved 85 percent of my shit before he got there anyway. I became a minimalist doing this and only had the bare minimum. Lets hope he isn't a self appointed neighborhood watch captain.
I rolled out of bed after 3 o'clock. And then took a nap shortly after because I didn't want to deal with the hangover headache. I'm so off my game now. Fuck you guys. Y'all even made me miss seeing the Hunger Games. On that note,
Just got home a little while ago. Thanks to flaky friends, first order of business was a tall glass of bourbon. For any EDM fans, they're streaming ULTRA on youtube all weekend. Avicii's on right now
I have a theory that there is no version of the song I Heard It Through The Grapevine that I won't like.
I got drunk by the pool today and am now pink like a Frenchwoman's slapped buttocks. Your problems of personal safety do not compare!
Mars is good, but whenever I hear this, I think of myself decked out in full viking attire singlehandedly slashing and pillaging my way through some village of non-viking pussies. Having a spastic Dudamel as the conductor just makes it even that more realistic to visualize.
Fun fact: Baby deer need their mothers to lick their anus in order to begin pooping. So if their mother is dead, the baby deer will die of constipation. I like to imagine this is the way Bambi truly ended.
So, I have a bender injury. It's not my liver (time will tell on that one). My belt buckle rubs on my belly button. Too many hours sitting on a barstool. I have an open wound. It hurts. It can't heal. I will die from infection from belly button injury before liver failure. Doesn't seem right.
I got upgraded to a free suite at a hotel Friday night. Turns out Anime North is in Toronto and all the hostels / cheaper places were booked up so I phoned up a fancy place and it was a reasonable rate with my discount and made some jokes with the nice lady on the phone and when I checked in they were all "okay, we have you in a suite... ah, I see we've complimentary upgraded you" and I was all "sweet!" and then when I got in there I may have gotten lost inside. Awesome, but a shame there were no ladies to impress. Then later at the bar, some of my friend's friends were speaking really crappy French and I thought "okay nobody here is speaking French without me being involved" so I go over and say hi and the girl who was speaking French gave up and the guy who was speaking with her then engaged me in very enthusiastic conversation, and called over another guy who was actually French to speak and he was also extremely pleased to talk with me. And I thought, "what the hell is wrong with this guy that he's more happy speaking French with me than he is focusing on this girl who looks like she's about to go home with him?". But then they all hopped in a cab together anyways. And some of my friend's gay friends were there and man if you want good stories, talk to gay guys.