Disney is incredibly popular with British tourists. How they all don't die the second they get off the plane I will never understand.
My sister is a saint amongst women. Her womb has taken another one for the team and given me a 1-2 year reprieve from demands for a grandchild. Halleilujah!
I'll probably just go to the beach and read a ton every weekend. My cousin lives here, but he and his wife have a newborn so I'm not expecting them to have much time to visit.
This could explain our foreign policy with Cuba: We used to be close and we just drifted apart. From this article: http://io9.com/heres-what-pangea-looks-like-mapped-with-modern-politi-509812695
Me and the wife put one photo of your baby up on facebook the day she was born just so everyone(her family, it is huge) could see her right away. If people want pictures we email or text them, but there was so many people it was easier to put the first one on facebook. We let our baby photographer put a link on facebook to her photo gallery. But that is all the will ever be on facebook. I will post pictures her on here once and a while but i feel that is slightly different then on facebook.
I just don't get the replacing of your photos with your child's on facebook. Do you assume that your child, above all other children, will get noticed more? The people who look at your profile are the people who know you. They know you have a kid. You aren't going to get any more kudos for being a parent than anybody else. I always looked at Facebook kid advertising as a breeding pool for vapid stage parents aka attention whoring. A while ago effinshenanigans said it best: I could not put it better myself.
The thing that bugs me the most about FB, and there are a few because I am a bitterly lonely, untrusting, ugly mutant, is that Facebook users are just not funny. My acquaintances have an international platform yet fail to bring much humor, depth, take a joke, or even be able to regurgitate funny memes in a timely manner. That really bugs me. It makes me realize that most of these people are not fun to be around. That's depressing. The whole thing has turned into a sordid diary of someone with multiple personality syndrome.
I visit Facebook maybe once or twice a week now, and rarely, if ever, post a status update. Myself and my close friends basically just use it for planning get togethers and such. On the other of the spectrum are people like my cousin, who famously posted "RIP Grandma" when our grandmother passed away. Thing was, none of the other cousins knew yet and many of us found out about her passing by his post. We're talking mere seconds after he found out because my mom called me about 10 minutes later. It was really enraging. Here's a basic summation of my best-practices: 1. I will unfollow or block anyone who posts political/religious based nonsense. You're not insightful, witty, or clever. Whatever you have to say has been said by countless other people and no one cares. 2 Anyone who consistently posts the banal minutiae of their life also gets unfollowed or blocked. My moms friend Peggy does this. "Watching Titanic." "Look at this bird outside." "Its hot out!" SHUT THE FUCK UP PEGGY. 3. I don't write on people's walls when it's their birthday nor do I post a "THANKS FOR THE BIRTHDAY WISHES!" status when its mine. I don't care about your birthday anymore than you care about my birthday, and I dont care if you took 2 seconds to write about it because the system reminded you. I can't think of anything more unthoughtful than that bullshit. 4. If you send me any request for a game, app, or something stupid, I unfriend you immediately. I unfriendly my dad because he sent me some FarmVille riff raff. 5. I do not share my of my pictures with anyone. It's all set so only I can see. Mind you're own business.
At brunch a week ago, the restaurant had an item on the menu named the Jersey Cannonball. There was no description whatsoever, so we naturally assumed it was a sex act. My buddy came up with the genius description: the Jersey Cannonball is when, during a blumpkin, the guy poops and water splashes back into the giver's face. Who said something about winning the thread? Also what the fuck, some shirtless guido high out of his mind tried to attack me on my way home from lunch today. He was bleeding from a bunch of scratches and asking for help, and I foolishly offered to call someone for him, because I wouldn't give him my phone. I called his girlfriend. She said he hit her, and she left him in the city. I told him that's what she said, that I couldn't help him any more, and he got aggressive. I walked away but after I'd covered about a block he decided he needed to fight me. The guy ran at me telling me to put my fists up. My impulsive defensive decision was to duck into a coffee shop until his crazy ass went away. So I walked into the coffee shop briskly, apologized to the guy behind the counter, and proceeded to explain that I was more or less chased inside by a guy who was high out of his mind. The shirtless, bleeding guido appeared in the window, aggressively approaching a man standing outside the shop, smoking a cigarette. The second man is a tall older man, with shaggy grey hair. The older man said a few words to the younger man, handed a cigarette to him and lit it. The guido accepts this, meanders outside the door to the store for a moment, then moves on. The older man then came inside. The first thing he said was, "I can't deal with people like that on a Sunday morning." The older man placed his coffee on the table where I was sitting, and joined me. We introduced ourselves. He said he was a generally peaceful man, but implied that he wasn't a man to be bothered. He then asked me to hold out a fist. I am not a small person. As I held my fist outstretched, the man enveloped it with mammoth hands. His hands looked like they could crush bricks. We had an excellent conversation, during part of which I learned that the guido was bleeding and bruised because his girlfriend hit him with her car. The older guy gave off the air of having been a concert security guard in the 60s. I hope to see him back at that coffee shop I am now going to frequent. Strange afternoon.
I think that sums up we of the Doesn't Give A Shit demographic of Facebook. To other people, it's life. I have heard of freiendships....RELATIONSHIPS started from people blindly meeting on Facebook. Is that what people do? Tinker around on that most overrated of sites hitting on friends of friends until one baits? Weird. And then we have instagram, which I had not heard of until we ridiculed it onehere. So that's what one billion dollars looks like. Douchbags and hipsters making their bullshit photos look retro. zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
This series by Deadspin, Why Your Children's Television Program Sucks, is hilarious. Max in a gimp suit to start you off.
Picking the most masculine and feminine players on the team. Nice work. Morgan is an absolute smokeshow and a budding star. Once Wambach finishes up, Morgan is the star of that team and with her other non-soccer "talents", she's gonna make herself some serious cash. The team as a whole is pretty damn attractive and marketable. I'm a big fan of Sydney Leroux and her relentless tattoo game. She's also got an attitude and she trolled the shit out of the Canadian fans booing her today. Spoiler
I am a fucking idiot. I'm going to fail a class that I didn't even need to take and it's is going to keep me from graduating this semester. Fuckkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkkk. Fuck it, I'm getting drunk.