Out of curiosity, are you into gargling the lemonade or just like a good spritz on your tits? Are there any dietary restrictions you make your candidates go through before the act? No asparagus, no chicken wings, must drink a quart of mineral water? Do you start grinding your teeth around the men's bathroom? Also, is it a turn-on for someone to say "I want to pee in your gape"?
I'm back on Facebook and am greatly amused by a friend's confidence in naming her pictures of herself "Young and Beautiful." I'm not saying she's ugly but she's definitely over confident. Also, handwriting is important. I have good handwriting, not bubbly but it has artistic flair. I shudder watching young people write. If something happens to our technology and no keyboard is available, what are you going to do? Be illiterate.
I don't know about you, but I'm going to use my typewriter. Problem solved. And you all thought it was useless hipster nostalgia.
I write in block all caps just like my Army parents and the Air Force taught me to. Hell I cent remember how to write half of the cursive alphabet because despite what the evil bitch nun told me, I have NEVER needed to use cursive.
My handwriting was decent in high school due to an interest in fountain pens. I also enjoy the physical act of writing, so it hasn't degenerated too badly. Unfortunately, I don't get to do it very often anymore thanks to computers and block-print logbooks. It's legible but could hardly be described as beautiful. I really should practice it more, as I love good handwriting more than most art. I wish I could make stuff like this with everyday writing. My brother's friends are... interesting. One of them has gone really, really far down the road of drugs and was boasting to the rest of us about injecting methadone and driving home on acid. I was not impressed. I like the vast majority of them, but he hangs out with his fair share of stoners who have crossed the line into druggies.
The last few pages of this thread have been golden. You guys are on fire. In other news, I've shown these puny Canadians the power of American bowels, needed my toilet attended to. I chanted USA USA USA while they got it back in order.
FACE. If it wasn't for our larger capacity bowls we're allowed in this country (look it up), you would be screaming for a Canadian janitor to save you. And they would be a married, gay athiest in the union.
Most of my schooling was in private Baptist schools in a tiny farming town. We had a class, an entire fucking class as I remember it, during a few of those years, especially for, and titled, Penmanship. We had sheets of paper upon which we traced letters, circles, up-and-down motions that could have passed for ballsack's EKG readout after a few long lines. Every. Day. I did more damage to my wrist tracing what I hope were somehow secretly Satanic symbols of crop death rituals in those few years than I have in a decade of beating it like it's a marketable skill. I hated that school and the miserable old fucks who ran it. It was ran like boot camp, but with the yelling and PT replaced by daily Bible readings, a Puritan dress code, and the insane rantings of a miserably obese Canadian teacher with an equally massive temper, whose desk area always smelled of what I later realized were probably tampons that should have been changed years prior. What I'm trying to say, in a highly roundabout way, is fuck cursive.
There's another messageboard that I used to post on where saying that would probably get several dozen extremely angry letters. Impeccably written, of course. Then again, the average age of the people on that forum is somewhere in the mid-fifties. It's probably the only widely popular place where AARP members hang out. Cursive is no longer a practical method of communication compared to writing. It's an artform, and I think it belongs in art class. I do think that penmanship is important, mostly because we still do a lot of writing, but cursive is not. It's on the same lines as photography replacing an artist painting a portrait. Can people still paint beautiful lifelike portraits? Yes, and they do. But it no longer serves the purpose of archiving the way it did four hundred years ago.
As a teacher with a history of poor penmanship, I'm proud that I've finally mastered writing in large letters on the white-board. But anything on a small scale is still illegible. Two more days until this gets to my doorstep:
My boss, who is brilliant and attractive in every respect, has to have the absolute worst handwriting in the world. It looks like a teenaged boy's writing - not all the letters are of consistent size, she can't spell to save her life, she even holds her pen in a way I've never seen before (she grips it with her entire fist like a toddler about to gnaw on a crayon). It's baffling.
That seems like it would be horribly uncomfortable. I wonder if its because there is someone in the office she really hates and every time she writes she is imagining stabbing the pen in old boys jugular.
Up until high school, I held the pen sandwiched between my middle and ring finger, with my thumb and index finger resting on top. One day I looked around and saw that everyone else was holding it between their thumbs and index finger and decided to switch. It took about two weeks to really make the transition, and suddenly I was writing much, much better. What amazed me was that no teacher, even in grade school, ever mentioned that this was a weird and hamhanded way of writing.
Yeah I am back too since about a month ago. I really missed seeing the pictures of BABIES that my sisters post, or pictures of whatever they're doing. I started a new account so I really only have the people I want to see updates from on there. It really is much more bearable this way. Edit: And it feels so good that the friend request from my mother in law has sat in its tray for a couple weeks now. NOT NOW, NOT EVER.
Serious question, why do people post inane, pointless, random photos of their kids doing something unspectacular? I don't give a shit your kid ate pasta and made a mess, I don't give a shit your kid smiled and crapped themselves at the same time. Why do people feel compelled to share these moments on facebook? It seems like single mothers do this more than most. Are they trying to get attention? Also, nothing makes a woman more attractive that posting up pictures of her kids doing something stupid. Nothing turns a guy on like photos of kids he'll have to take care of if he gets involved. Also, these photos will comeback to bite the kids in the future.