Who is Lew and where did this guy find these apples? So Smirnoff makes a sweet tea flavored vodka. I tried it. Verdict is...pretty fucking good.
If you're following the roommates friends not getting my jokes saga, another entry: they were discussing the percentage of homosexuals. One surmised that one man in ten is gay. I paused, then disagreed. "One man in ten men isn't gay. One man in one man is gay. One man is ten men is just a showoff." ::radio silence:: Eventually one got it, but it was still awkward. Also, I stole that joke from my friend Sam Morrill, you should google him.
If that line was delivered with any sort of decency it deserves at least a chuckle. It sounds like those people are just boneheads. Put on some nickelback, quote Dane Cook, and let the good times roll.
What's with the Canadian alumni storming the trenches tonight? I gots me the scurvy real bad and can't holds mah rifle, sarge. Nice. A flasback. The colours, man! The colours!
First legal-in-this-state drink of alcohol I've had. Carriage House Apple brandy. A good way to end a day that includes your first trip to the gun range, I think. Well, it's probably better than doing that the other way around.
Gris, you fucking faggot-nigger-queer, stop spoofing my account! I SWEAR, I SWEAR, THAT ISN'T ME! I'M PROUD BALLSACK NUMBER 3!
All these sacks of balls are starting to confuse me. It's probably just regular old 'sack having a conversation with himself trying to look important.
Your picture there is undeniable proof that emo/hipster kids are gay. After a minute or two of looking at that girls boobs, I noticed there's a dude in the picture, and ridiculously stupid haircut aside, he's not looking at the bare naked chick next to him. God, this world is getting dumber.
Random musing for single guys trying to get laid: 1.) Find a wine bar restaurant combo 2.) Learn their food and wine pairings 3.) Invite girl to restaurant, pretend you've never been there and somehow accurately predict the perfect wine pairing for her food selection 4.) Get laid, HARD. If all else fails find a random hot single chick there, you will bump into at least eight on your way to the bathroom. I consider myself a faithful guy, but god damn, the chicks at wine bars are fucking hot.
I just discovered that this exists: NSFW My mind is blown. I think I have to watch this, but I don't know if I should get really drunk or really blazed or some combination of the two beforehand.
The same can be said with Martini Bars. If you're looking for 50ish MILFs with too much money, no sex, and an alcohol problem, martini bars are fish in a barrel. No shit, I went to one recently with my girlfriend and had my ass grabbed twice by women my mom's age. I felt violated and my girlfriend just laughed. Thats when I realized the reason chicks go to gay clubs. Double standard my ass.
I need to go see this dude in concert. I realized tonight that I am woefully out of shape compared to my friends, time to start hitting the weights again (it's been two years).
I picked up a quarter of nice hash today. Don't have a screen for my bowl so I am smoking it on top of kind bud. I will fall asleep easy tonight.
This was posted in the R&R thread earlier, and if you haven't seen it, it's worth checking out. The home page alone is fucking hilarious. http://www.beyondalphacoaching.com.au/ There should be a thread about this. Someone start one, I'm too lazy.
What the fuck is wrong with that one womans lips in the the pictures? So if you follow their system you get to sleep with a deformed woman.
If I had a nickel... Now that you mention it, I've changed my stance a bit on Dane Cook after recently watching Isolated Incident. Granted, it's not great, and it's certainly not the best, but it might, at the very least, be his best. I like him a little more, if only for his change in tone and delivery. He's seems to be a bit more humble, compared to 5 years ago, and it shows. I can respect that. At the very least, he can turn some negatives into positives. For that matter, I'm off of the "let's gang on Ballsack and/or his mom" routine. Dude's come around lately, so...uhh, yeah. Take that! Let's just all be friends and go back to telling harmless incest jokes. Channel-surfing thought: David Cross appearing in the live-action Alvin and the Chipmunks movie is the biggest mindfuck I've seen this side of Carlin on Thomas and Friends.
Somehow I think tonight would have been more entertaining had it been me alone with something alcoholic instead of with the girlfriend over. Somehow I think most nights would follow the same pattern.