MTV's Jersey Shore (was "Jersey without my hair gel")

That video would be great even if it was just 3 seconds long and all you heard was, "I ain't in love with you cousin, I'm not George Michael Bluth." Awesome.

And @whoever was talking about Vinny: Fuck, I wish he would be shown more on the show, the guy is genuinely hilarious (and unlike everyone else, is actually trying to be funny, instead of unintentional retarded.) I feel like he's the most down to earth guy and therefore doesn't do enough stupid shit for the producers to put him on over Snooki showing her gaping asshole to as many people as possible.

 

WoW...The Situation and Snookie on Conan was amazing, captivating television. I could watch The Situation in any setting and be absolutely completely invested, cant get enough of him. This is television history in the making!!!!

"Sometimes it's "Situation", it is also "The Situation", and yeah I gues it could also be "Sitch""...Bravo sir, Bravo!

 

I suspect that she was attacked by the LBS monster between that video and the show, cause she is way more roly-poly now. Like Jacoby said on the BS Report, she is built like an exercise ball. And she has an old woman face.

"Tommy, we were just battling to the beat!" J-Wow's excuses were priceless. My roommates and I spent most of the weekend making references to beating the beat back. Unfortunately, I wouldn't be caught dead smacking my hands on a bar floor, so my beating back of the beat was a bit weak.

 

I can't believe we haven't been discussing the fight. Come on guys.

So, when the 3 second .gif of the punch came out I think most people watched that thing carefully. We were discussing it at the bar Friday night, and when I mentioned that I had "analyzed that thing like the Zapruder film" not only did a friend agree, but actually had been using the same Zapruder line in other conversations.

SO, even if MTV didn't show the punch in real time, we've all seen it. That was the Oswald punch right?

So, the argument at the bar basically became "how do the guys in the bar NOT immediately kill the puncher." My argument is that they tried, but MTV wouldn't let them. We see how fast that the "bouncers" (who probably worked for the show" hustled the puncher outside, and i doubt it's a coincidence that there was a cop waiting right there.

My belief is that MTV is totally prepared for this outcome. They have people on hand to break up any and all fights, and a cop always waiting outside in case someone assaults one of the cast members. And lets not kid each other, we've seen it with The Real World. The house members are always the object of ridicule and threats due to the MTV camera crews constantly up their butts, so MTV knows what they're doing in this regard.

However, there is one critical element that has yet to be explained. If the preview clip was the Zapruder film, and the initial punch was Oswald, then the second blackout is the second gunman on the grassy knoll. We all saw on the internet what happens during the first blackout, but what happens during the second? We see some shots of chaos, we even see Jwoww (JWoww?) land a few lefts to the dude's head. But we're missing something crucial, something so violent it ALSO had to be blacked out.

My assumption is that either Pauly or The Situation landed a solid shot on the guy. But could it also be another girl getting hit? Could it be something else? Something worse? Or could it just be a shot of Snooki? Perhaps injured enough to make MTV feel they shouldn't show it.

WHAT HAPPENED IN THE SECOND BLACK OUT!

 

I think you're forgetting something huge here, it's not cheating if you're dancing with a guy to house music, that's "battling" (but for them it looked like uncontrollable siezures). Now, if it were R&B, that would be completely different because you'd be "grinding".

Ugh.

There probably is a lot of things they didn't show. Sherwood, I think you've officially taken on the responsibility of searching through reality TV blogs and forums to get to the bottom of this.

 

In the NY Daily News the other day they actually had an almost full page article on the hair of Pauly D (I think that's the one, the guy with the Sonic the Hedgehog hair). It takes him 25-30 minutes a day just to do his hair. I prefer the 2 seconds it takes to dry off my shaved head.

 

Your hair doesn't get you nearly as much snatch/cooch/puss-ay as Pauly D's, loser.

 

Oh, I get it now. Getting hit in the face shows that you love your friends/"family" because you got their backs. The more you know...

 

I absolutely hate Ronnie. Not that anyone on the show is better than the other, but what did he expect the situation to do after Snookie got hit? I'm sure every guy was appalled by that punch just like I was, but everything happened so quickly I don't think anyone had time to react.

Also when everyone was on the boat why was it up to Ronnie to decide when to leave? He threw poor Snookie in the water when she was trying to get a guys number, god knows she just got cracked in the jaw give her a little time!!

Oh my god I think i just posted on the jersey shore board.....I'm going to bathe with a toaster!

 

I think I see a relative resemblence:


separated at birth?

she'd probably want him to "Fuckin' ass fuck me. RIGHT NOW." anyways.

 

This haircut is called a "Blowout."

I have been trying to do it to annoy my wife but I can't seem to get that extreme spike.

 

It no doubt "blows", but looking like the tool I clean my daughter's formula bottles out with isn't cool, it makes you look like a complete fucking tool. Honestly, you WANT to look like the Gotti kids: Fredo, Fredo and Fredo? For shame.

 

See, I think his gripe was that while the other 3 guys were seeing if Snookie was ok, talking to the police, running around looking to beat some ass in retaliation, The Situation was creeping around looking to bring girls home. Paulie is just as much of a snatch hound as The Situation, but he was more concerned with what was going on at that point.

As for the boat thing, Idk, maybe dude was just cranky and wanted to go home. Its not like Snookie hadn't acted like a spoiled brat before, and thats just what we've seen.

Ronnie, despite being a bitch sometimes about Sam, is probably my favorite. Seems like a pretty loyal dude, and he delivers some quality lines. Pounding it out is great, but his line about if a girl cheated on him, he wouldn't send her flowers, he would send her a picture of his cock and some gum and say "Chew on this"? That is fucking comedy gold. And I also appreciate him calling out The Situation for being a clown.

Glad to see Vinnie got some camera time this week.

 

I nearly swollowed my fucking tongue when stupid bitch number 3 (they have no names to me)says:

"I am the Kim Kardashian* of Staten Island."

Excuse me for a second....

A HA HA HA HAHA HAH AH!!!!! (repeat for ten minutes)

I don't know about you, but as far as bragging goes, in my world that's about as respectable as saying:

"I am the Adolph Hitler of the Fifth Ring Of Hell."





*-I hope somebody pulls a fucking Menendez on this shithole family, and SOON.

 

Exactly if you notice Ronnie was just blaming the Situation to make himself look better. This is why his girl was rubbing his back and saying "because your a better friend than him"

We really have no idea how long after the punch The Situation asked those girls to come home with him it could have been longer than the show lead us to believe. What I was really pointing out was Ronnie blaming T.S for buying the shots, that was ridiculous, and it didn't cause the guy to punch Snookie, (Snookie screaming in the guys ear got her hit...of course we all know what a cowardly, sickly move that was to punch a girl like that in the face..but that's why she got hit not because the situation bought shot's....) Also please understand I don't think any of them are model friends but I doubt anything the Situation did caused that scene. Ronnie accused him of antagonizing the guys as well, I just didn't see it.

None of them are loyal you will see that in the future when they go on talk shows, do tabloid interviews, ect....and trash each other. Bet on it.

 

I'm not sure, but...I think the thread is over.

 

I posted before that I hated Ronnie, I take that back all my hatred is reserved for his girlfriend Sammi. I would rather bang a man that looked like Snookie than go on one date with her. She pick's a fight and then makes him apologize pretty much every show. I agree he should not have pushed her or put his hands on her but she was antagonizing that bald idiot.

I was stunned how well those guys handled themselves with that guy, I don't know if it was because camera's were on them or what, but they did their best to avoid that fight and then Ronnie unloaded on the guy.

I'm sure that local guy hates seeing his beachtown (or hometown) invaded by guys with blowouts and fake tans but he was still a total dickbag and deserved to get in a fight.

I also wouldn't mind eating at Vinnie's house...............