Oh-Come-All-Ye-Druuuunk-ards! Easter WDT 4/5/12

I don't think she's that hot, but damn. I'd fuck her doctor, because that's quality work.

 

Shit sign me up, be a good story.

 

Fuck it, I'll go on record as saying that as long as her vagina was in working condition, I'd bang the bejeezus out of her. I really don't care what she was born with.

 

Hahahahah. Fuckin Parker. Sorry i ruined your trap, dude.

 

Now if I remember that nip/tuck show right and some conversation on loveline, they don't naturally lubricate and feels different if there was a side by side comparison.

Yeah...fuck you Iczorro.

 

Haaaaaaaaaaaahahahhaha

 

I don't think anyone would have fallen for it, by the way you worded the question and how (s)he looks* my first thought was "that's a tranny".

*and by that I mean classically hot

 

Neovaginas also aren't nearly as deep (they usually max at about 5 inches), and have to be constantly dilated in the early going. It bear noting that they're not the same as FAB vaginas, so you might want to know that you're dealing with something that's been surgically constructed before you start jackhammerin' away.

 

Yeah my set-up is bad. But if I declared her hot, I wouldn't have been able to back out of my joke. I could have just posted the picture and said nothing, also weird.

23 minutes until I can drink at work and not be judged.

 

I would love to have a story that ends with, "And that's how I broke her vagina."

 

I'm not googling the difference between neo and FAB at work due to my computer freezing at the worst time. What's the difference?

 

Instead, you must settle for "She fell asleep on me while watching Facts Of Life."

B
ROASTED
O
M

 

On the train to work today, a crazy guy got on on my second-to-last stop, and he started pacing the car shouting "I" over and over and over again.

"I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I!"

Everyone was trying to ignore him, but I look up at one moment and realize that there's another, more incognito, crazy guy sitting across from me. He's looked really agitated. And, very quietly, he goes: "K." I think I was the only person that heard him.

Meanwhile, the guy continues with his "I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I!"

And every couple of rounds, the other guy, with a complete straight face and sitting completely still will say "K." "K." "K."

And the guy keeps going "I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I!"

And eventually the guy starts to get really upset, and he starts getting louder. "K! K! K! K! K! K!"

A couple more people start to notice, but it isn't as constant as the "I" guy so for the most part it's not too noticeable.

"I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I!"

Eventually, he pulls himself half out of his seat, his face is totally red, and he starts screaming it. So now, this is happening:

"I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I!" K! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! K! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! K! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! I! K!"

But the "I" guy is completely oblivious, so the "K" guy starts to match his consistency, but much louder. So it's just these two crazy guys battling it out, only the "I" guy continues to not notice what's happening, and the "K" guy keeps getting angrier, and I can't fucking help it. I tried to contain it. But I just start giggling like a schoolgirl, because it is just so ridiculous. And the "K" guy whirls around me and yells "ASSHOLE!"

It was a great start to my day. I can't stop laughing at the absurdity.

 

Oh, FAB = female at birth, neo is one constructed by a surgeon.

I have read and heard about the basic procedures (either they invert the skin of the penis and testicle-less scrotum, or they use a piece of colon), and I still don't really have a firm grasp on how it works.

 

My friend Katie told me this site has reduced her productivity at work by 90%. Then again she's the "hot secretary" at a major company so not like there was shit she was doing anyway.

Whatshouldwecallme?

 

Speaking of women who used to be be men, they put the filthpig Chloe Kardashian on the cover of fucking Cosmopoliton this month. A divine quest for irony, combining THAT face with THAT magazine title. She does call an important question, though: What WOULD Ron Pearlman look like if he got a sex change as a teenager?

So I ask you...Is it possible to un-masturbate to someone?

 

This just got emailed out...


Beer time.

 

Does anybody still sell grills with cast iron grates? Mine is falling apart and everything I see is that stainless steel bullshit. I'm aware of mangrates but would like to avoid going that rout if I can.