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Oh Say Can You Seeeee! Weeklong 4th of July Drunk Thread '12

Discussion in 'General Discussion' started by Blue Dog, Jun 28, 2012.

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  1. The Village Idiot

    The Village Idiot
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    Porn Worthy, Bitches

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    It's funny, when I was younger (I think we're about the same age) I would have done the same. Wild plans, good times, be a 'bachelor' again (without the banging random chicks). When my wife went away earlier this year? Here was my daily schedule:

    Wake up at 6:15. Walk dog for 45 minutes.
    Cup of coffee. Hit gym.
    Shower, go to diner, negate all health affects of earlier gym workout.
    Go home, watch tv. Fall asleep.
    Wake up, have cup of coffee. Walk dog.
    Read.
    Play video games, get annoyed, stop playing video games.
    Read.
    Make dinner. Watch tv. Read.
    Lay in bed, watch tv, read. Fall asleep.

    And the sad part? I was like 'WOW that was an awesome day.'
     
  2. Nom Chompsky

    Nom Chompsky
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    Honorary TiBette

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    Her game is so tight. I love it.
     
  3. DannyMac

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    Disturbed

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    Swing through Hartsfield on a Friday afternoon during vacation season and you're pretty much ready to slap a baby in the mouth by the time you get to your gate. I have done both regularly and I would still give it to Hartsfield hands down.

    The one that surprises me as not being the busiest airport is Schipol in Amsterdam. I have been there all hours of the day and it's always packed.
     
  4. Angel_1756

    Angel_1756
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    The Big Four-Oh

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    You know that feeling when the alarm goes off at 5:30, and you roll out of bed, blink a few times, realize it's a holiday, crawl back into bed and sleep until 9?

    Yeah, it's an awesome feeling.

    Anyone want a late breakfast? Bacon, eggs and hashbrowns at Angel's house.
     
  5. Juice

    Juice
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    Moderately Gender Fluid

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    Yes please, I fucking need it. I was all set to buy a new car today and sign the papers when the dealership comes back and says my 1.9% rate has magically turned into a 7.29% rate because not enough established credit or some shit, regardless of a 740 credit score. Fucking assholes, they can take that car and shove it up their asses.
     
  6. Backroom

    Backroom
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    MERRICA.

     
    #266 Backroom, Jul 2, 2012
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 27, 2015
  7. shimmered

    shimmered
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    One of my favorite songs. That, and Pledge Allegiance to the Hag (which, by the way, is NOT a country love song) both make me smile.


    His whole Chief album is really good.
     
    #267 shimmered, Jul 2, 2012
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 27, 2015
  8. CharlesJohnson

    CharlesJohnson
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    This dude is brain damaged. His normal speaking voice quavers, perpetual DTs. Also, I fucking gagged. Two habaneros and a tube of Icy Hot.





    Oh good, he has a kid.
     
    #268 CharlesJohnson, Jul 2, 2012
    Last edited by a moderator: Mar 27, 2015
  9. ghettoastronaut

    ghettoastronaut
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    Those eyes. Oh my god, those eyes. They're penetrating my soul from across the internet.
     
  10. Pussy Galore

    Pussy Galore
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    Go through Hartsfield Jackson on any Friday, period, and it sucks. Mondays, too. It doesn't help that we have three security gates serving six terminals (I think the international terminal now has its own checkpoints). Sky Harbor in Phoenix has more available checkpoints serving fewer terminals. Fuck the Atlanta airport. Miami is worse, though - what moron decided that I have to go through security to get to a connecting flight? Whoever designed the Miami airport, that's who.
     
  11. Kubla Kahn

    Kubla Kahn
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    I think I laughed the hardest when he said, "I don't know why I don't blink," just how he said it randomly and you could tell he was responding to commenters. Had be busting up. If they ever revived The Man Show I'd give this guy a weekly spot to eat what ever people suggested.
     
  12. Noland

    Noland
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    Are we going to get an update every time something inconsequential happens on your honeymoon?
     
  13. lust4life

    lust4life
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    Isn't that what Twitter is for?
     
  14. Nicole

    Nicole
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    I predict photos of sunsets, 2 pairs of feet propped up on lounge chairs, crabs in the sand, a tableful of empty foo-foo drinks, a blurry reggae band, crazy sunburnt shoulders, the view from the balcony, someone's ass snorkelling, a decent shot of a turtle underwater, and black dudes fishing off of a pier.

    If I get 5 of these, I call Bingo.
     
  15. Angel_1756

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    Update #14: Drank too much tequila. Couldn't get it up. Had first married fight. Have procured divorce papers. Stand by for Update #15, "the demise of my marriage and the birth of FormerWife".
     
  16. ghettoastronaut

    ghettoastronaut
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    Update #240(a): Son born last night. Doctors say he has Tay-Sachs. Wife's genetic background now in question.

    Update #240(b): Son born last night. Skin turns out to be black. Wife claiming it's a genetic anomaly. Not so sure.
     
  17. katokoch

    katokoch
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    You're getting ahead of yourself. I'm just gonna envision 'Sack like this guy all week:

    [​IMG]

    "Off to find the mythical clitoris!"
     
  18. lhprop1

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    I didn't realize Ellen Degeneres was a member of TiB. Welcome Ellen. Feel free to browse the boobie thread, but please don't post.
     
  19. Parker

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    Nom stop drinking that haterade. Stop it now. I wasn't gamed, I've been learning and getting better. She didn't do the above the first time, but its been growing more and more as I figure out what she likes. I am her first black guy and she did say I was her biggest D. I just never hooked up with a girl that liked the spanking, choking and hairpulling so now that I've learned how to do more things with one hand, she's fucking loving it. She's flexible so doing missionary with while I'm holding her right leg up above her head and using that same hand to reach under her and pull her hair AND keeping a good pace/position going is definitely an acquired skill.

    Stop hating.
     
  20. bewildered

    bewildered
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    Aw, you're getting better at sex. It's cute.
     
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